"My Wrestling Soapbox": The Champ Is Here!!!

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(Photo by Gaye Gerard/Getty Images)

Well, folks, welcome to another exciting edition of "The Soapbox," where I love to rant and rave about the world that is wrestling. 

Today, I'll rant about wrestling and a couple more things as well.

 

The Champ Is Here

No, I'm not talking about John Cena.  I'm talking about yours truly, D. Stokes. 

I will now and forever be known as the 2009 March Madness pop shot champion in my office!! 

32 competitors came and 31 fell.  For my efforts, I won $50 and the right to take the basketball setup home with me. 

What can I say?  I got a hell of a jumpshot! 

Enough about me....

 

Love is In The Air

Do you think Ryan Michael likes Randy Orton more than Gilligan likes Joe Burgett??  Things that make you go HMMMMMM.....

Speaking of like (or love), would you like to hear my Wrestlemania predictions?  You would?  Good! 

Listen to this past week's "Hit The Ropes Radio" and you'll hear my predictions as well as Shane and Daris. 

There are enough predictions on this site to last me a lifetime. 

Just wait until after Wrestlemania is over.  We get to read 357 recaps of the show.  Oh Brother!!

 

Mr. Wrestlemania

Call me a "mark," but I can't help but be excited about Wrestlemania.  It has become a tradition for me, like watching the Super Bowl. 

Most people feel that the Shawn Michaels vs. Undertaker match will be the highlight of the show. 

I agree and make the argument that it should be the last match on the card.  I know this is unlikely, but we can wish can't we?

The promos/vignettes for the feud have been great in my opinion. 

This week on RAW, we thought Taker was finally going to get his hands on HBK.  To everyone's surprise (not really) Michaels was under the casket and planted yet another superkick on the Undertaker. 

The coolest promo of the whole feud was Shawn Michaels' promo from last week's Smackdown where he came out as the "Overtaker."

The holy music, the white smoke that was pretty cool.  Can't wait for this match. 

 

A Match 50 Years In The Making

What better way to celebrate Wrestlemania weekend then to talk some TNA.  Please don't "boo" I'm trying to be unbiased here.

For those of you that have listened to HTR the past couple of weeks you may be familiar with a listener from Dallas named "Dap".

Dap loves TNA like the Hardy's love Jack Russell Terriers.  He thinks they are the best thing since sliced bread, the bees knees, the...you get the point.  He likes them a lot!

So much so that he said that Lockdown would be better than Wrestlemania. 

Now I appreciate Dap calling in and showing the show some love but what exactly do they smoke in Dallas?  Or at least what is Dap smoking? 

I've been waiting my whole life to see an out-of-shape Mick Foley go against a past-his-prime Sting.  So has Dap apparently. 

I respect both men for what they've done, but give me a break! 

This is the best main event TNA could come up with?  

Makes you wonder why TNA has a man who ran WCW into the ground booking its show.  I know!  They want to be just like WCW.

Keep it up, TNA.  You're well on your way. 

 

12 Rounds

Did you know that the WWE film "12 Rounds" is in theaters right now? 

Do you know Danny Fisher?  How about the evil and diabolicle Miles? 

Did you know that Miles has a twin brother named Moe who has a gimpy leg? 

Did you know that Danny Fisher's mom graduated college top of her class? 

Did the WWE know that there exists this thing called OVERKILL and they are guilty as charged? 

Coming Soon....Elf II starring Hornswoggle. 

 

Divas, Divas and More Divas

As JLB cringes, Kelly Kelly is my sleeper pick to win the diva battle royal and be crowned Ms. Wrestlemania. 

Sure there are others like Gail Kim, Beth Phoenix, and Michelle McCool who have a shot.  Then you have legends like Trish Stratus and Torrie Wilson who could win. 

Forgive me for going out on a limb just a bit. 

Wouldn't it be hilarious if Santino won?  Wouldn't it be cool if Chyna were in the battle royal?  Just some random thoughts.   

Daris calls this match the "bathroom break."

Daris you are married.  I've never met you in person but I'm almost certain you aren't blind! 

Bathroom break?  Please!!  Who would want to miss all this eye candy?  

When Mae Young comes out make a quick dash to the toilet, handle your business and then come back to see the hotness that is the WWE divas! 

 

One Night With Shane 

Check the HTR archives as Shane was on a quest to find a lady friend but was "checked" by his "boo" Jen Preston. 

Shane, you got some 'splaining to do!!

A few tips for my fellow HTR co-host. 

  • After ragging on you for watching 90210 and crying at the end of "Marley and Me," I realize that chicks might actually dig this, as you are showing your sensitive side.  Keep up the good work!  
  • There are a minority of women who actually like wrestling.  You may want to keep that a secret for a while, if you want to get past first base.  Or if all else fails, you have Jen who loves wrestling!   
  • So help me understand, Shane, you have a computer and the internet but you still use a VCR?  You probably still have those extra large cell phones that we used in the early 90s, don't you?  The word of the day is D-V-D Player!  Chicks dig technology.  Welcome to the 21st century, Mr. Howard.   

Shane Howard has never openly admitted to crying at the end of "Marley and Me".  Since he watches 90210 and Gossip Girl, it is assumed that he did. 

Well the soapbox is now closed.  My city is hosting the Final Four and I will be partaking in some of the activities!  I would say Go Michigan State, but I'd be lying.

Go Tar Heels!!  Stokes...out. 

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