30 Hilarious Photos of Athletes in Their Rookie Year

1 of 33

J.D. Cuban/Getty Images
Andy Lyons/Getty Images

Scooped up from their little ponds and dumped in the deep, wide ocean, rookies often don't know where to swim first. While many of these young fishies are focused on proving their chops, they become vulnerable to other predators lurking out there, the most sinister of which is the sports photographer.

Rookies—especially those who didn't play ball for a widely covered college team—aren't exactly camera savvy. Takes them a while to get accustomed to all those eyes in the sky and on the wall and in the stands and in the locker rooms...

Now, let's relish all those hysterical shots of our once naive goofy, pimply, awkward, clueless heroes of the court, the diamond, the rink, the track and the field.

Click on and let the silliness begin.

Honorable Mention: Chris Kaman, 2003

Robert Laberge/Getty Images

Chris Kaman's Rookie Year Salary: $2,394,600

Bottle of hair gel suitable for athletic use: $23.99

Failure to use aforementioned gel: Priceless

30. Austin Rivers, 2012

Source: houseofhighlights.com

Rivers cleverly diverts any rookie mockery that might be directed his way and has a little fun at Anthony Davis' expense.

Unibrow accessory by Ralph Lauren.

29. Phil Kessel, 2006

Dave Sandford/Getty Images

All work and no play makes Phil a dull boy.

Mwah mwah mwah!

28. Madison Bumgarner, 2010

Doug Pensinger/Getty Images

It's all fun and games until someone loses an eye, Madison.

27. Brett Favre, 1991

Source: pigskindoctors.com

Might wanna step back 'fore I spit this wad'a tabacky juice on them there purty shoes you got on.

26. Tim Tebow, 2010

Photo: Hector Acevedo/ZUMApress

The Lord, He doth shine upon Tebow's blessed, bare pate.

25. Al Alburquerque, 2011

Photo: Rick Osentoski-US PRESSWIRE

Wearing the little girly backpack—a true rite of passage in MLB rookie-hood.

24. Kevin Barnes and Robert Henson, 2009

Photo: AP

Barnes and Henson enjoyed hanging around after practice during their rookie year.

23. Krys Barch, 2006

Source: chicagonow.com

"I decided as long as I was going to hell, I might as well do it thoroughly."

- Edward Cullen

22. Phil Dawson, 1999

Scott Halleran/Getty Images

Blue Mooooon...

You saw me standing alooooone...

Without a dream in my heart

Without a love of my ooooown...

21. Jed Lowrie, 2008

Nick Laham/Getty Images

Not sure what happened here exactly. Is the tongue part of some sort of Jedi mind trick? Is this an attempt to be cool, to be like Mike?

My take is that he just flubbed a smile.

Future rookies, do yourselves a favor and study these instructions before your first player portrait.

20. Tony Hawk, 1986

Photo: Stacy Peralta

OK, so Hawk never really had a rookie year. The guy was pulling 900s before he was out of diapers.

But this picture is just too good to remain lost and obscure in cyberspace.

19. Dan Carter, 2003

Cooperation between national space programs at its grandest.

Pictured here: a Kiwi propels a Frenchman into orbit.

18. Tom Brady, 2000

Source: checkoutmycards.com

Someday I'll get bumped up to third-string quarterback; I just know it.

17. Brock Lesnar, 2000

Source: examiner.com

Official photo senior year at University of Minnesota. Taken shortly before this Goldy Gopher became The Next Big Thing.

16. LeBron James, 2003

Stretching is good. Stretching helps. But when it makes you look like you have a nasty bulge of groin fat... not so flattering.

15. Lance Armstrong, 1991

Joe Patronite/Getty Images

The future ex-winner of seven Tour De France titles.

14. Travis Ivey, 2010

Photo: Steve Mitchell/US PRESSWIRE

If all those scary cameras and mics are too much for Travis, he can just pop his head back inside his shell.

13. Danica Patrick, 2005

Darrell Ingham/Getty Images

The pouty, plain Jane you see in the first picture caught on to the whole camera culture lightning fast.

Here she is just a year later:

Danica Patrick at ESPY Awards Red Carpet 2006

12. Michael Phelps, 2001

Source: rookiereview.com

Lost member of ZZ Top?

11. David Beckham, 1992

Source: celebrity9.com

Disgruntled NKOTB reject.

10. Tiger Woods, 1996

J.D. Cuban/Getty Images

Those spangled bras a little more than you can handle, young Tiger?

Guess so. Note his strategic positioning of the trophy for this photo op.

9. Venus Williams, 1994

Al Bello/Getty Images

Could this knobbly kneed awkward little lass really grow up to be our Venus?

8. Brayden Schenn, 2009

Bruce Bennett/Getty Images

Stupefy!

Lumos!

Reducto!

Wingardium Levosia!

7. Evan Scribner, 2011

Source: deadspin.com

Now here's a rookie-hazing accessory that actually has some thematic resonance. Rookies are like Luke Skywalker—talented young prodigies with great potential. But they need more training and experience before they do battle against the cunning veterans.

Please note the absence of any inverted Yoda speech in this slide.

Thank me later, you will.