Stop Following Me WWE

David BowstonCorrespondent IMarch 8, 2009

Okay, first off I will explain about the Kelly Kelly picture with three simple words...look at her, plus there weren't any pictures I thought went with this subject. Secondly, I'm not really sure how to start this off so I'll begin from my childhood


Attitude Era

So I'm nine or ten years old sitting in my house in a small town in Northern Ireland (where I am originally from) playing with Mighty Morphin' Power Rangers when this advert comes on for a program called Sunday Night Heat. Immediately I become addicted. I mean come on, I'm a 10 year old boy, obviously I'm going to love love fighting.

But problems arose, because this was from America and the time differences and my mother being strict, well it was on past my bed time. So I told my mum that it was just a normal kids program, no swearing, no violence it is only on late because there is always a movie before hand.

So after weeks of begging, my mum comes to me with a VHS Video Tape with the words "Sunday Heat" scribbled on it, she told me she taped it for me and I could watch it before school if I got up early on Mondays.

So I sprint to our front room, throw it in the VHS and I am glued to these huge men, the athleticism and the story lines. Obviously I didn't know what some of the story lines meant at such a young age, but I loved the fighting.

During Heat there was replays of Raw and SmackDown on Sky TV (which is UK's version of cable) but my family didn't have cable, not because we couldn't afford it but it just wasn't necessary.

Then I realized my best friend had cable, so I would go to his house every Friday and Saturday when Raw and SmackDown were on, and then he would come to my house after school on Mondays to watch Heat, and we were completely sucked in.

Just as we started really getting into collecting stickers, buying the books and magazines, buying the old VHS tapes and asking our parents or older friends about wrestling's history.

The first thing I remember seeing was D-X backstage, Triple H, Shawn Michaels, B.A. Billy Gunn, X-Pac and Road Dogg. Like almost every other wrestling fan in the world, we fell in love with D-X.

In the playground in school, our class used to make up rosters and matches at every recess and the girls in the class would sing the theme songs and cheer for us as we walked down to the playground.

I was X-Pac and my best friend was Road Dogg and we were just as rowdy and obnoxious as the real D-X were. Our storylines were unrealistic, for example I used to be able to beat The Rock, Kane and Stone Cold in handicap matches with ease.

We were the best in the business (school) and nobody wanted to wrestle us because they kept losing so we ended up losing to others in purpose to keep them happy. Until walking home from school one day we had a brilliant idea for our last day of Primary School before going to "Big Kid" School.

We heard once you went to middle school only nerds and losers with no friends watched wrestling so we knew we needed one big final event. We gathered up everybody in our class about a month before our final day, we sat them down and told them we would have our own WrestleMania on the last day, and what was the main event? X-Pac versus Road Dogg, Me versus my best friend, David vs. Neil, Hogan vs. Warrior, Rock vs. Austin, HBK vs. The Hitman.

The reception our idea got was phenomenal, people made posters, girls in our class asked for autographs and as the guys started training, the girls made a ring rather than four jackets for turnbuckles, and set up about five seats.

It came to the big day, everything had ran smoothly and it was the main event. James had even brought a CD player with all the WWF's theme songs to make it authentic. I entered first to a great ovation as I was the baby face, my friend entered with the typical bad guy, cocky strut and we got the match under way.

For two 11 year olds, we put on a great display and eventually I went for the X-Factor but to my horror it was countered by a low blow and as the (imaginary) referee warned my opponent I was struck with a steel chair (pillow) from behind, I was pinned and defeated. That was the day I put the VHS tapes away, sold the magazines and stopped watching Heat and in other words, that was the day I grew up.


Fast forward to 2006

I had a PS2 and was going through the typical teenager phase of not liking or caring about anything, I was in a video game store with Neil who was still my best friend from Primary School, this was three or four years later and our friendship was still strong. We looked through the games and saw SmackDown vs. Raw, we bought it for a laugh and got it home and looked through the roster.

"No X-Pac, no Road Dogg, no Rock, no Stone Cold. What the f**k?" So we played a few games, I was Rey Mysterio my friend was RVD. We went on the WWE website and looked up the roster and were sickened by the lack of our favorites. One night my friend rings me and tells me that he is watching Raw and it's actually pretty good, so I go over and we get caught up with wrestling again.

I was convinced I wanted to be a professional wrestler, but I was a tiny 5"4 7st kid so I went out, bought a second hand weight set and started trying to get big. A year down the line I'm still the same weight, nothing but skin and bones, I sent away tapes of me wrestling but got rejected by all the companies so I think screw it, I'm giving up.

Now it's Armageddon 2008, I'm up late one night and I think "Yeah I'll watch this for old time's sake." So I flick it on and I see Jeff Hardy vs. MVP and I love every minute of Jeff Hardy and I think "Well yea he's big but look at him compared to the rest he isn't that big."

At this point I'm doing a sports course at University (which is College in America I think) so I'm pretty fit. I go to my sports coach who is this old guy that nobody knows much about and I ask him could I use the sports hall after class because I want to practice some wrestling moves, he tells me he used to wrestle and almost made it big. He tells me all these great stories about guys he wrestled with in independent circuits and I'm captivated.

I watched Royal Rumble 2008, No Way Out, WrestleMania XXIV then I think again I still have no reason to pursue this, I'm never going to make it.

Then I move to London in order to pursue a job in sports coaching and moved in a small flat by myself, I was lonely, missing home, I couldn't sleep at night so while I was up I watched ECW and I saw Kofi Kingston & Evan Bourne vs. Mike Knox & Shelton Benjamin and I thought to myself, "That guy Evan Bourne looks like someone I know, dark spiky hair, small, not the biggest guy in the bunch, looks fast, takes to the sky a lot...who is it? Oh yea it's me!"

So I got right back into wrestling and here we are, I'm full blow addicted. I'm on B/R everyday looking at the latest news, and to be honest I only came to B/R to get the latest, I mean I am no writer as you can probably tell and while we're on the subject sorry for the length of this article.

I'm also on YouTube looking up classic matches, watching DVDs (I just finished HBK's DVD, I would recommend it.) I'm hitting the gym trying to get big and training with guys twice my size and kicking their asses week in and week out.

I feel like I just can't escape from WWE and I blame you guys for your great articles! A lot of you have shared your wrestling histories and experiences and I thought I'd throw mine out there so I get it off my chest. I better wrap this up, its long enough already. Peace.

Oh and also, after seeing Kelly Kelly, how could I not watch WWE?