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10 Things to Watch in the Buffalo Bills Preseason Finale

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10 Things to Watch in the Buffalo Bills Preseason Finale
Christian Petersen/Getty Images
Tarvaris Jackson, the newest Bill to tread into the team's quarterback nightmares.

Before touching on the entertainment value (zero) of watching the NFL preseason game No. 4, it might be useful to contemplate the week that was for the Bills at the quarterback position, which every good viewer of NFL and ESPN talk shows will readily tell you, IS THE MOST IMPORTANT POSITION IN SPORTS, EVER, IN THE HISTORY OF SPORTS.

Here's the timeline:

  1. The Buffalo Bills announce that Vince Young will play significant minutes ahead of last year's No. 2 QB Tyler Thigpen, all but assuring the universe that Vince Young had won the backup job. The Bills' expert beat reporter for the Buffalo News,Tim Graham, wrote that Young had a "rear naked choke on the backup gig."

  2. Coach Chan Gailey goes on record saying he's committed to having gadget QB/WR Brad Smith as the team's third-string quarterback, all but assuring, in combination with development No. 1, that Tyler Thigpen would be sent packing to the pigpen.

  3. Ryan Fitzpatrick comes out against the Steelers and proves the he's Ryan Fitzpatrick: brilliant, erratic, dangerous, inaccurate. Fitzpatrick had two passes that were batted down by the Pittsburgh defensive line and faced a steady diet of five-man blitzes that threw him off-rhythm and gave the Bills' 2012 opponents a snapshot of a gameplan.

  4. Vince Young, who was mediocre in his first go in preseason game No. 1 and slightly better in game No. 2, came out and threw an awful interception (that could have easily been returned for a pick six), and never looked back. VY's second pick, a bizarre carbon copy of his first, was returned down the sideline to the Bills' 8-yard-line.

  5. The very next day, the Bills cut Vince Young and traded for the Seattle Seahawks' Tarvaris Jackson, who with the trade was officially tagged with the “journeyman” label.

  6. With about two weeks until the Bills open their season in New York against those blustery Jets, Bills GM Buddy Nix and Chan Gailey both separately tell reporters they have no idea whether they might have to carry four quarterbacks on the roster into the season, as the Bills may need Thigpen until Jackson is settled in.

So going into the last preseason game, it should be no wonder that the quarterback position will be one of intense scrutiny.

Not that that alone will make the game any more watchable. The No. 1 units will play about five minutes until giving way to the 20 or so players at the bottom of their rosters while the announcers on TV blather on about the intricacies of hobby rockets.

The only possible entertainment one might derive from this game is forming a drinking game around the events for 1) when a replacement official makes a dumb call, 2) when an announcer gets a guy's name wrong, 3) whenever you can't remember what down they're on, and 4) whenever they show a really good football player (like Mario Williams or Calvin Johnson) after the first quarter who is standing on the sidelines smiling, without any potential of actually playing because, you know, it's preseason.

Feel free to add more ideas in the comments.

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