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Steve Guttenberg Beats Randy Couture

Rear NakedFeb 16, 2009

I'm always dubious when fighters try their hand at acting. It reminds me of someone like Wild Bill Hickok.

He was one of the best gunfighters in the west. Everyone was terrified of the guy, except when he sat down at a poker table.

For some reason, he believed he could be a successful gambler. His gunfighting mystique should help him at the tables, but you only get one calling, and poker was not his.

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In the end, he was shot in the back of the head...while playing poker.

You might be thinking this post is nothing more than another opportunity for me to pimp Deadwood, which in some ways it is.

In others it's about the ridiculousness of fighters acting. Let's take the case of Randy Couture. Along with Chuck Liddell, he's the most recognizable MMA fighter alive.

You would think his in-cage presence could translate well to the big screen, much like Wild Bill's gunfighting mystique should translate to the poker table. Like Wild Bill, he believes he has a second calling. And like Wild Bill, he is completely wrong.

Ladies and gentlemen, Randy Couture has less Hollywood bankability than Steve Guttenberg. Yes, the Steve Guttenberg from the "Police Academy" movies.

Yes, the Steve Guttenberg who hasn't been seen in a major film for the last 46 years. Yes, that Steve Guttenberg. But, wait. There's more.

Other people with more bankability than Randy Couture:

Tara Reid
Beverly D'Angelo
Billy Dee Williams
Stephen Baldwin
Daniel Baldwin

Actually, Couture did not get one single vote from any of the members of the "global entertainment industry." Think about that. Not one vote.

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