50 Pictures of Athletes Living Way Better Than You
It's no secret that the worst professional athlete in most major sports is probably living far better than you could ever imagine. Which is fine, they have special skills and most of them really do earn their money.
But after spending the entire day peering in on their glorious lives of splendor, it's going to be really hard for me to feel for someone in a contract dispute! I'm just having a little bit of a fun—I really don't begrudge anyone for being successful.
I actually enjoyed the research and love that Twitter gives us all a creepy view into the once private lives of famous people. I know, I'm a creeper…whatever.
Let's take a look at 50 pictures of athletes who are living way better than most of us.
50. Jimmy Clausen, Carolina Panthers
Notre Dame bust Jimmy Clausen gets paid first round (pre-rookie salary cap) money to hold Cam Newton's helmet in the time between when he scores and has to go back out on the field.
Apparently his feet are tired after long days of doing nothing.
49. Jason Heyward, Atlanta Braves
Sure Braves right fielder Jason Heyward is living better than all of us, that makes sense.
The fact that his dog is living considerably better, that hurts a little.
48. Chris Kluwe, Minnesota Vikings
Vikings punter Chris Kluwe is living the life every nerd dreams of. He's (sort of) a professional athlete, he's got a *ton* of Magic the Gathering card things, classic video games in his house and he's creative enough to make his own drinks.
This mix right here is called the White Irishman…I suspect it was disgusting.
47. Carmelo Anthony, New York Knicks
Well, we can all agree that things probably haven't gone exactly according to plan for Carmelo Anthony since being traded to the New York Knicks.
Melo can take solace in the fact that even when things are looking down, he still gets to hang with ESPN's Hannah Storm.
46. Antonio Brown, Pittsburgh Steelers
Cars and such are fine and good, but there's nothing I'm more jealous of than the opportunities that professional athletes get to hang with seriously awesome animals.
Steelers wide receiver Antonio Brown looks kinda happy, but he's not cherishing the moment nearly as much as I would.
45. Ricky Romero, Toronto Blue Jays
44. Vernon Davis, San Francisco 49ers
Suddenly a superstar tight end for the 49ers, Vernon Davis is coming off his breakout year in the NFL, following his first five relatively disappointing seasons.
Though, judging by his Twitter gallery, Davis has always known how to live like a superstar. Fast cars, custom designed sneaks and the occasion jaunt to Las Vegas is just how he rolls.
43. Santonio Holmes, New York Jets
I'm not going to pretend like I have any idea what "Grind Time" means to the kids these days. It's probably something along the lines of "Swaggin," but who knows.
Jets wide receiver Santonio Holmes is definitely living way better than you and, despite not knowing what it means, I'm pretty sure this photo is proof of it.
42. Jared Dudley, Phoenix Suns
Suns forward Jared Dudley takes full advantage of the NBA offseason, by jaunting all over Europe with the family. He just recently returned from an extended tour of Paris and London.
I'm jealous. I would be doing exactly the same thing.
41. Takeo Spikes, San Diego Chargers
Doesn't it seem like massive necked linebacker Takeo Spikes has been playing football since…forever ago? The average NFL career is about 3.5 years and Spikes has bested that by 12.
Perhaps the key to his career longevity is working out with that ridiculous ocean view in Hawaii. The Aloha State does a body good.
40. DuJuan Harris, Jacksonville Jaguars
Jaguars running back DuJuan Harris obviously rules. Those are some of the coolest shoes I've ever seen in my life.
39. Coco Ho, Surfer
Coco Ho is a professional surfer and the niece of legendary Hawaiian entertainer Don Ho. And trust me, I used to live in Hawaii, Don Ho is a huge deal there. Mean Ms. Coco Ho is a huge deal there as well.
Tis the life of and island princess.
38. Ryan Newman, NASCAR
I'm not really into NASCAR, but I used to absolutely love The Dukes of Hazzard when I was little. Naturally I'm talking about the goofy television show and not that cinematic monstrosity starring Jessica Simpson.
I would freaking kill (a bug or something) for the chance to spend the day cruising around in the General Lee. Although, I'm pretty sure I'd fall in and out of the car window every time.
37. Vontae Davis, Miami Dolphins
Niners PICs Vontae Davis and Vernon Davis are just resting up on luxury water crafts before trying to make another run for the Super Bowl.
My money is on the Niners.
36. Rob Drydek, Skateboarder
Seriously!? A donkey! How do athletes have unlimited access to awesome animals?
35. DeJuan Blair, San Antonio Spurs
Spurs forward DeJuan Blair was born and raised in Pittsburgh and plays ball in the desert. Obviously that's not where he's been buying real estate though.
Looks like he has his sets on San Francisco.
34. Dane Fletcher, New England Patriots
Patriots linebacker Dane Fletcher looks like he's been taking some lessons from teammate Rob Gronkowski on how to party like an awesome bro.
Dude's a natural.
33. Jimmie Johnson, NASCAR
I'm not sure how popular Jimmie Johnson is in the NASCAR world. The fact that I know his name probably means that he's pretty famous, but I get the sense that he might not be very well liked.
I know I certainly don't like him after clicking through his braggy Twitter gallery, where he just posts about how awesome his life is.
Chad Ochocinco, New England Patriots
Soon to be former Patriots wide receiver Chad Johnson lives quite the sweet life. We know this because he documents every second of it and posts it all on Twitter for the world to roll their eyes at.
He recently fled south for awhile, insisting "life is so much better in Mexico." Yeah, I guess it is better if your okay with daily mass murders and decapitated bodies hanging from every bridge in Juarez.
You like it so much, just stay bro.
31. Larry Fitzgerald, Arizona Cardinals
Cardinals superstar wide receiver Larry Fitzgerald is a humanitarian and global traveler during the NFL offseason.
He's also recently been charged with holding up the the Tower of Pisa in Italy. Which, naturally he rules at.
30. Amar'e Stoudemire, New York Knicks
Amar'e Stoudemire may be the New York Knick with the knee problems and the reputation for beating up fire extinguishers, but you're crazy if you think that's going to stop him from grindin…or whatever.
That is one sharp dressed man right there. Dude's closet is probably the size of your first floor.
29. Justin Verlander, Detroit Tigers
Well, apparently while the rest of us are limited to go-karts and bumper cars, professional athletes are given access to actual race cars on the weekend.
28. Shaquille O'Neal, Retired NBA
I used to be shocked when I'd see Shaquille O'Neal alongside people I had absolutely no clue that he knew. But, I've since learned, that Shaq knows pretty much everyone on the planet.
27. Lance Armstrong, Retired Cyclist
I have no idea if this venue is a vacation destination for retired cyclist Lance Armstrong or if it's just where he lives. Either way, it's making me grumble about my basement apartment right now.
26. Nyjer Morgan, Milwaukee Brewers
The Brewers resident eccentric weirdo Nyjer Morgan doesn't seem to be one to sit at home and chillax during his time off.
More likely to find him jaunting off to the beach for a surf or dressing up like a cowboy for no reason at all. Pretty awesome, either way.
25. Kevin Love, Minnesota Timberwolves
Just because Timberwolves superstar forward Kevin Love plays basketball in Minnesota, that doesn't mean he has to spend his offseason there.
Love is a California boy who calls this palatial palace (or condo) home on the off season. L.A. isn't my thing, but DAG that's a killer view.
24. LaRon Landry, New York Jets
Jets safety LaRon Landry played the first five seasons of his NFL career for the Redskins and probably had plenty of good times cruising the DC Metro area in this sweet ride.
And this was the first car he bought after being drafted, he's probably upgraded to something even sweeter recently. New team, New York, new car…that sounds like professional athlete logic.
23. Matt Kemp, Los Angeles Dodgers
Before going down with injury, the Dodgers Matt Kemp was the toast of the MLB in 2012. Sadly, it was a short reign at the top.
But don't feel too bad for Kemp, it's not like he's recuperating in his parent's basement or anything. Being on the disabled list never looked so glorious.
22. Deron Williams, Brooklyn Nets
Soon to be not the Nets point guard, superstar Deron Williams is expected to be one of the most coveted free agents of the NBA offseason.
Oh, and it looks like he has a few friends in very high places.
21. Alana Blanchard, Surfer
Oh, it's just another day at the office for sexy surfer Alana Blanchard. Looks just like your office, huh?
20. CM Punk, WWE
WWE Champion CM Punk is a straight up rockstar and, on a personal note, my favorite wrestler of all time. Not to mention being smoking hot.
Seriously, you have to be pretty legit to get some face time with The Iron Sheik! Dude is the greatest Iranian entertainer of all time, or so he says on Twitter!
19. Jeremy Ross, Indianapolis Colts
Colts wide receiver Jeremy Ross might be old enough to play in the NFL, but he's not too old to play with toys. This is his "Black Rambo" look—which rules.
18. Jeremy Ross, Indianapolis Colts
And again! When he's not going to battle with the sweetest toys I've ever seen, he's riding around looking gangsta as hell on a horseback—no small achievement.
17. Mike Wallace, Pittsburgh Steelers
Steelers wide receiver Mike Wallace might be holding out for that big new money contract because he's already out of all the old money. I have no idea how much money he's got laid out on the table, but something tells me it's more than a game check's worth.
Dude is sure living large today. But before we get jealous, let's check back in with him about five years after he leaves the league.
16. John Wall, Washington Wizards
It's probably been a bit of an adjustment for John Wall to go from superstar Kentucky standout to an often criticized star on one of the worst franchises in sports.
Although, he does have piles of money to cheer him up and these two hot broads who made (well, provided in some way) him a birthday cake in the shape of an ass.
15. Silje Norendal, Norwegian Snowboarder
Extreme athletes with sponsorships lead some of the most ridiculously awesome lives out there. Case in point...
14. Rob Gronkowski, New England Patriots
Like you need me to tell you that the Patriots superstud tight end Rob Gronkowski is living the good life. You've seen enough of his antics to know that already.
What I'm wondering is if he and teammate Dane Fletcher are bro roomies, since Gronk said "we" in regards to that hot tub installation. If they are roomies, I bet they throw some killer parties.
13. Paul Bissonnette, Phoenix Coyotes
Paul Bissonnette plays forward for the Phoenix Coyotes and sure knows how to take full advantage of all that warm weather.
Biz Nasty described this scene as just another "above average day at the pool."
Paul Pierce, Boston Celtics
If the Celtics don't manage to upset the Heat in the Eastern Conference Finals, Celts forward Paul Pierce probably won't spend too much time in Boston sulking about his misfortunes.
And that's The Truth.
Pierce has got an adorable family to join him as he beebops around the globe in the offseason. Last year it was Disneyland and the Great Wall of China, who knows what it'll be this year.
11. Eric Decker, Denver Broncos
Something tells me that things are just beginning to get exciting for Broncos wide receiver Eric Decker. Not only is he trading in his hooptie quarterback for a luxury model, he's also dating this lovely lady, Ms. Jessie James (@TheJessicaJames).
10. LeBron James, Miami Heat
Are you surprised to learn this is the view from Heat superstar LeBron James' front porch? You shouldn't be, because he's crazy rich.
9. Steve Jackson, St. Louis Rams
Looks like Rams running back Steven Jackson gets VIP access in Las Vegas. Something tells me this isn't his first time in Sin City. Vegas, baby!
8. Dwyane Wade, Miami Heat
Heat superstar Dwyane Wade already has a championship ring, so even if the Big Three never come through, nobody will doubt D-Wade's legacy. Nor will they ever question the overwhelming hotness of girlfriend Gabrielle Union.
7. Darnell Dockett, Arizona Cardinals
Darnell Dockett recently celebrated a birthday and woke up to this pile of loot, courtesy of his brother. Couple of insanely expensive looking watches and between $15-20,000 in cash.
What did you get for your last birthday?
6. Darnell Dockett's Son
That's right, even Darnell Dockett's son is living larger than you ever will.
5. Andre Iguodala, Philadelphia 76ers
It doesn't get much fancier than drinking afternoon champagne in a fancy suit with your pinky finger up, now does it?
4. Kevin Durant, Oklahoma City Thunder
As if Thunder superstar Kevin Durant didn't already have enough going for him. Hello! He could be on his way to an NBA Championship at the ripe old age of 23. LeBron would kill for that.
All that and he and teammate James Harden get to hang out with super hot Sports Illustrated model Kate Upton? Some people have all the luck…sheesh.
3. Evan Longoria, Tampa Bay Rays
Rays star Evan Longoria is suited up for some flying and a photoshoot in his private plane. Add that to the fact that he's dating Playboy Playmate Jaime Edmondson and he's definitely living way better than you.
2. Dez Bryant, Dallas Cowboys
Cowboys wide receiver Dez Bryant might not be able to learn the playbook, but he sure as hell knows how to spend his paychecks. Cars: check! Jewelry: check! Thousands of pairs of sneakers: check check!
1. C.J. Wilson, L.A. Angels of Anaheim
Angels ace C.J. Wilson has got all the goods: A Bentley, a sweet pool, kick ass crib and a gigantic pile of money. Straightedge is probably more fun when you're rich as hell.