Counting Chickens: 2009 Florida Gator Schedule

Old Aesop knew a thing or two about life lessons. 

He taught me that slow and steady wins the race, that greed can ruin a perfect situation, and how no act of kindness, no matter how small, is ever wasted. His stories make sense and can be applied to everyday life, so why am I not heeding the fable of “The Milkmaid and her Pail?”

The story goes that Patty, a farmer's daughter, is daydreaming as she walks to town with a pail of milk balanced on her head. Her thoughts:

"The milk in this pail will provide me with cream, which I will make into butter, which I will sell in the market, and buy a dozen eggs, which will hatch into chickens, which will lay more eggs, and soon I shall have a large poultry yard. I'll sell some of the fowls and buy myself a handsome new gown and go to the fair, and when the young fellows try to make love to me, I'll toss my head and pass them by."

At that moment, Patty tossed her head and lost the pail full of milk. Her mother admonished, "Do not count your chickens before they are hatched."

When you have Mr. Heisman (not of the Sam Bradford type) returning for a senior year, things look good.  When you are also returning 11 starters on defense, things are looking great. 

Mix in a little Urban Meyer and a dash of Charlie Strong and you have the beginning of a pretty unbelievable recipe (I hope it calls for asiago cheese).  Also throw in the fact that Florida will likely be No. 1 in the polls (oh, how I hate preseason polls, another rant for another time). 

Oh, I still haven’t gotten to the kicker yet, have I? Florida’s schedule is extremely favorable. 

How favorable?  Take a look for yourself:

Sat. Sept. 5 Charleston Southern

Sat. Sept. 12 Troy

Sat. Sept. 19 Tennessee

Sat. Sept. 26 at Kentucky (Lexington, KY)

Sat. Oct. 10 at LSU (Baton Rouge, LA)

Sat. Oct. 17 Arkansas (Homecoming)

Sat. Oct. 24 at Mississippi State (Starkville, MS)

Sat. Oct. 31 Georgia (Jacksonville, FL)

Sat. Nov. 7 Vanderbilt

Sat. Nov. 14 at South Carolina (Columbia, SC)

Sat. Nov. 21 Florida International

Sat. Nov. 28 Florida State

The upside: No Bama or Ole Miss

The downside: One game, just one small miscue, one daydreaming Saturday afternoon will send Florida from L.A. to LA. 

Troy is a tricky team.  (I just heard representatives from LSU and Florida State say AMEN.) WLOCP will be slightly less exciting with two first-rounders gone. Florida State could finally show signs of life next year, but the biggest test will come from the school of jacking cell phone numbers. 

LSU will certainly have Oct. 10 circled in Sharpie (or their favorite generic brand permanent marker). Why? Because LSU wants to play spoiler and improve their odds. 

2006 National Champion: Florida

2007 National Champion: LSU

2008 National Champion: Florida

LSU just figures it’s their turn again. I’m sure most LSU and Florida fans would love to alternate national championships, but I’m too busy counting chickens. 

I hope I’m right and that my chickens don’t come home to roost. I’m going to run to Chick-Fil-A and get me an eight-piece with a sweet tea now. Then go home and watch Armageddon and hope that “Chick” gets to see his son again. 

Okay, I better end this before the sky starts falling.