Attention All Bandwagon Jumpers: You Are Here By on Report

B MacCorrespondent IJanuary 26, 2009

Attention bandwagon jumpers! You call yourselves "true" fans, but you're really just hopping onto whatever team is hot at the moment.

Case in point: How to spot a bandwagon jumper and how to discern one from a real fan. I, like the rest of society, am sick of you people; calling yourselves true fans, HA!

Bandwagon jumpers most likely know absolutely nothing about their team that they are supporting. To see one is a bandwagon jumper ask simple and easy roster questions first.

"Who is the everyday second baseman for the Philadelphia Phillies?" Answer: Chase "The Man" Utley

If they can't answer that, then you know that they are a bandwagon jumper. If they answer the easy questions, start asking progressively harder questions, involve stats.

For example: "Can you name the only former Philadelphia Phillies pitcher to throw two no-hitters, one in both leagues? Answer: Jim Bunning (Father's Day 1964 Phillies uniform, Tigers uniform years earlier.)

Or "Can you name me two Hall of Fame pitchers on the Philadelphia Phillies 1915 World Series roster?" Answer: Grover "Pete" Alexander, Chief Bender.

Also, ask how long have they been a fan for. If they answer anything less than
"since birth", they are a jumper. Or ask them how many games they went to over the last couple of years.

Ask how many: close loss games, rain-outs, blow-outs, burn-outs (hot, sunny, sun-burnt afternoon games), freeze-outs (cold, windy, early spring month games), blown saves, Adam Eaton stinkers, Brett Myers, Kyle Kendrick, J.A. Happ stinkers, they have been to.

Did they or have they just bought a ton of a certain team's merchandise (shirts, hats, bumper stickers, magnets, pins, etc) in the past couple of weeks or months?

So attention bandwagon jumpers, you are on notice. Thanks.