Five Keys To Success For Houston Texans in 2009

Despite extraordinary talent, the Texans pulled off another mediocre season at 8-8.  What will the Texans need to work on this off-season to produce the franchise’s first winning record in 2009?

Electric Shock Torture for Turnovers

I don’t care if they soak each Texan guilty of a turnover in water and hook a car battery to his toes after the game, turnovers are killing the team.  The majority of these turnovers were interceptions thrown by Schaub and Rosenfels.  On a lighter note, Schaub showed more restraint towards the end of the season when he started throwing passes out of bounds instead of trying to force it downfield causing interceptions.

Reboot the Defense

Mario Williams and Dameko Ryans are phenomenal cornerstones to the Texans’ defense, but they obviously can’t go it alone.  The Texans’ defense ranked 22nd in the NFL at the end of '08.  The Texans took a step in the right direction by firing every defensive coach and their mother, but they can’t stop there.  More help for Mario Williams is imperative; hopefully the Texans will draft strong in the defensive arena this year. 

Bone and Tendon Enhancement Pills for Matt Schaub

A lot of fans fault the Texans’ backup Sage Rosenfels for his inconsistent performances and tendency towards turnovers, but let’s not forget the reason why Sage is out there.  Matt Schaub is constantly getting injured, that’s why! 

When Schaub starts and finishes the same game he tends to have excellent numbers, but it’s hard to do that with what seems like bubblegum holding his knees together.  A less permeable offensive line is a good start, but they need to get Schaub on a constant intravenous drip of Brett Favre’s blood.   

A Refrigerator

Plain and simple, the Texans have no short yardage power back.  Steve Slaton had an awesome rookie year with 1282 yards, but at 5’9" he lacks the stature.  This issue could be handled on draft day, or they could simply recruit from within the ranks.  Put in Frank Okam, he weighs 340 lbs.  Jokes aside, the Texans red zone offense looked more like Steve Carrell’s sex life in 40 Year Old Virgin.  They would get so close but never score.  A solid power back could be the ingredient that changes the Texans’ flaccid red zone performance.  

Win AFC South Division Games

The Texans were not born into a rinky-dink, Mickey Mouse division like the AFC West.  No, the AFC South is a man’s division and 8-8 just doesn’t cut the cheese.  If the Texans want a playoff shot they are going to have to start beating the Titans and Colts on a regular basis.  I am calling for a no holds barred, “The Longest Yard,” prison rules, gridiron football: brass knuckles punches at the bottom of the pile, karate chops to the throat, eye gouging and face stomping.