Will Ohman thought he was a prankster until he met his master.
Lefty reliever Will Ohman spent five seasons with the Chicago Cubs, the longest stay of his nine-year major-league career. Though he's gone on to pitch for five other teams since leaving the Cubs, he still has fond memories of his teammates there.
First, here's what Ohman once did to Dempster:
I tried to out-think him once and paid the price. I super glued his zipper open on his baseball pants the day he was starting. I also put the laces in his shoes upside down. I thought I got him.
I need to try that on someone in the near future. While I think about how I'd gain access to a pair of pants that, for example, my brother-in-law might wear, check out how Dempster retaliated against Ohman.
The next day I am walking out to the bullpen before the game and the Brewers bullpen coach asked me to come into their pen. He said, 'Does this belong to you?' Right next to him was the front wheel from my sports car. Dempster also removed all four wheels and had me go on a search-and-seek mission to recover the other three. Don't mess with Ryan Dempster, funniest man on earth.
I think this is what people mean when they say "next level," because that's clearly where Dempster took it. Ohman utilized something you could pick up at the drugstore for his prank, probably spending three bucks.
Maybe Dempster didn't spend any money if he took the wheels off Dempster's car himself—unless he shelled out for an impact wrench to get those lug nuts off quickly. (And yes, I had to Google which tools would be used to remove lug nuts. I don't know anything about cars, though I have changed a tire and have one of those four-way wrenches in my trunk.)
Regardless of what Dempster used or whom he may have employed to help him take off the tires and scatter them, he certainly put much more effort into his prank than Ohman did. That is commitment. It's no wonder that even years later, Ohman holds nothing but admiration for Dempster.