Today's Chicago Bears Biology Lesson: The Unusual Parasite, Bob Babich

In biology, organisms that survive through a long-term attachment to a stronger host organism, at the expense of that host's well-being, are referred to as parasites. Depending on biological context, the term parasite can refer to any number of species, ranging from ticks to weeds to tapeworms.

But in today's lesson, we will discuss one lesser-known parasite that is truly a marvel of nature. Name: Bob Babich. Host Organism/Organization: The Chicago Bears.

When strong and aggressive enough, some parasites can completely sap the life from some of nature's strongest organisms. With enough time, vines, weeds and molds can bring down huge oak trees, while microscopic intestinal parasites can quickly lead to the demise of otherwise healthy mammals.

But never before has any parasite caused the kind of rapid devastation to an entire professional organization as Babich has for the Chicago Bears.

Babich became the defensive coordinator for the Bears after Ron Rivera left town after helping lead the team to Super Bowl XLI. Most Bears fans, media outlets, and even players were mystified by Rivera's firing, but the opportunistic Babich was promoted by his best buddy and symbiont, Lovie Smith.

Previously, Babich lay dormant in his seemingly unnecessary role as the linebackers coach, overseeing and "mentoring" hugely talented players like Brian Urlacher and Lance Briggs both of whom had already established themselves as perennial Pro-Bowlers.

But even then, the parasite Babich was perfectly willing to take credit for their success in his first two two seasons with the Bears.

Latching onto his sole defender and Head Coach Lovie Smith for protection from the perplexed media, Babich settled into his new habitat as defensive coordinator, which came with a more impressive title, a nicer office and a bigger paycheck.

However unqualified Babich was, his unique ability to leach off of the success, kindness and talent of the rest of the people comprising the Bears organism/organization meant that his promotion was practically guaranteed following Rivera's dismissal.

What followed in Babich's first two seasons in his new habitat was quite unprecedented. The Bears defense plummeted from third and fifth in the league in 2005 and 2006, respectively, to 28th and 21st in just his first two seasons as defensive coordinator, without any major roster changes.

No parasite has ever succeeded in causing such profound destruction to its host. Not even the world-record-setting 37-foot tapeworm extracted from a Mississippi woman in 1991.

The Bears have always lived and died by their defense, and for a franchise with so much talent and money invested on that side of the ball, their inability to free themselves from this pathogen may prove to be the undoing of not only the talented players currently on the roster, but also the the previously successful head coach, and an otherwise proud tradition.

So you might be asking yourself, how can this be stopped or prevented? Unfortunately, because of Babich's parasitic nature, the answer is not as simple as you might have hoped.

The Bears' organization has apparently decided to take out their frustrations with Babich by stomping out younger and weaker organisms like their linebackers, defensive line, and defensive backs coaches. Yet Babich still remains intact and healthy as ever in his habitat as the D.C.

Due to his unusual attachment to his host Lovie Smith, perhaps the best the Bears as an organism/organization could hope to do is to demote Babich to a lesser role where he would still be able to survive off the good graces and talent of others, but would be essentially dormant again and not in a position to further compromise the well being of the team as a whole.

But if you were to ask me, I'd still say the best way to get rid of a weed is to pull it out by the roots and be gone of it forever.

And that concludes today's lesson.

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