The Doctor's WWE SmackDown Recap: The 121 Things We Learned, Loved and Hated

The Doctor Chris MuellerFeatured ColumnistJanuary 27, 2012

Picture: (Love this picture)
Picture: (Love this picture)

The final show going into the Royal Rumble is over, and now all that is left is to start on the path to WrestleMania.

The show had several quick matches which serves to advance numerous feuds, but for a show going into one of the biggest nights of the year I thought they were a little stale.

The Main event during a commercial break for some strange reason, but the real story is how Bryan was angling to have Show and Henry hurt each other during their match.

Randy Orton also returned to try and take some revenge on Wade Barrett, but Barrett escaped and Orton had to settle for giving RKOs to five low card superstars instead.

Each week for the last few months I have been doing these recap lists for Monday Night Raw, but after a few readers requests I decided to start doing them for SmackDown as well. Thank you to everyone who has supported this weekly column since the start.

For anyone who is new to my weekly recaps what I do is run down the show with a long list I compile while watching the show. It is equal parts humor, recap, preview, revelations, speculations, questions and answers.

I hope you enjoy this week's list of the 121 things we learned, loved and hated from this week's SmackDown.

1. The show begins with a recap of Big Show running over AJ last week.
2. Big Show comes down to the ring to talk about what happened.
3. He apologized to AJ, who he says forgave him right away.
4. Who would not forgive a seven foot giant who might crush you if you didn't?
5. Show talks about considering retirement because he has hurt so many people in his life.
6. Show is shedding some tears, he is a better actor now than he was in Knuckleheads.
7. Daniel Bryan comes out to some good heat, wait, this is pre-recorded, who knows what the crowd sounded like.
8. He says AJ was too medicated to even remember Show visiting
9. He says WWE is a place for wrestlers, not genetic freaks.
10. He tells Show not to dare to bring up Andre The Giant as an example because h is no Andre.
11. I might be alone in this, but I think Show has surpassed Andre.
12. I think we tend to put legends who were the first of their kind on a pedestal but rarely like to admit when someone surpasses them because we feel like it would diminish what the other person has done.
13. Bryan says Show should just retire right now.
14. It is kind of surreal to see a little guy bully a big guy like this.
15. Bryan is growing into a better heel each week.
16. Bryan slaps Show twice before Show pushes him in the corner
17. HAHA, he called Bryan an "arrogant little ass."
18. Now Mark Henry is out, I wonder who he will side with?
19. He reminds us it's a triple threat cage match at the Rumble
20. He says Bryan has a Napolean complex.
21. It's a really good way to describe his current heel character.
22. Wow, he demands Bryan comes closer to talk to him and Bryan listens.
23. Line of the night, MArk Henry says to Bryan "I am going to tear your skin off on principle."
24. Did Mark Henry take 15 years to get this interesting or did WWE just never give him a fair shake? I like this guy more now than ever.
25. Teddy Long comes out and announces Henry vs Big Show for later.
26. Is this the first week since Bryan won the title where he hasn't defended the belt?
27. After the break Cody Rhodes is out ready for action.
28, A video airs with Cody saying he decided to have pity on Justin Gabriel and give him a non-title rematch.
29. This should be a decent match given the wrestlers involved.
30. Gabriel needs to lose the wings on his boots, he isn't Ultimo Dragon.
31. Rhodes hits the Alabama Slam early on for a nea rfall.
32. Rhodes is keeping a slow pace early on grounding Gabriel.
33. Some quick kicks reverse the momentum.
34. Rhodes hits Beautiful disaster followed by Cross Rhodes for the pin and the win.
35. I guess my hopes of a Gabriel/Rhodes title feud have been dashed. Two losses in a row kind of takes Gabriel out of the running.
36. Santino and Yoshi Tatsu are backstage talking to Teddy Long.
37. They want to form a tag team called Santoshi.
38, No wait, Yoshitino.
39. Drew McIntyre comes in to plead for his job.
40. He makes a nice reference to Babe Ruth once striking out five times in a single game.
41. Long puts him in a last chance match with Sheamus that will happen after the commercial.
42. I am so happy to see Tatsu getting some screen time, he is one of the most under rated wrestler on the roster.
43. I wish he was wearing his face paint, it was a nice touch to his gimmick.
44. I am always surprised that Drew McIntyre has never been offered a shampoo commercial.
45. We get Scotland vs Ireland when we come back from commercial.
46. They don't show Drew's entrance, from what I read he got a half baby face pop from the crowd.
47. Booker brings up that Sheamus, Barrett and McIntyre all started close together in WWE and Drew is the only one who hasn't risen up the ladder yet.
48. I guess we are just lumping together all the Europeans now. Please see above picture for proof that I am also guilty of this.
49. A Brogue Kick after a couple minutes wins the match for Sheamus.
50. This match wasn't nearly long enough.
51. Sheamus has what I call "sideways momentum" going into the Rumble. He is on a hot streak but has not really feuded with any particular person as of late.
52. I just realized the theme for the Royal Rumble has a section which sounds oddly similar to Lenny Kravitz "I wanna fly away."
53. Seriously, am I alone in this? There is a part in the beginning where I actually thought that was the song I was hearing.
54. I just have to say this really quick, someone just offered me some of those new popcorn chicken type nuggets from McDonald's and they are awful. Be warned.
55. I love when WWE does the "Royal Rumble by the numbers" videos before the event each year. They should have more PPV promos where stats are featured, they are interesting to hear sometimes.
56. Seeing Punk get squashed between Big Daddy V and Mark Henry in the video was hilarious.
57. Next match up is Santoshi vs Epico and Primo.
58. Can anyone give me an interpretation of Rosa's pre-match video, I don't speak Spanish.
59. She is looking amazing as usual, Booker seems rather taken with her, I hope Sharmell isn't jealous.
60. Ha, Booker said "What you talkin' bout Cole."
61. He always knew what Willis was talking about.
62. At least Yoshi is wearing his mask during his entrance, why are they flexing?
63. Santino and Yoshi have a little contest to see who can bow the lowest before the match.
64. I think Santino and Yoshi could make an enjoyable pairing, but I think Yoshi should be taken more seriously as a good wrestler.
65. Having a talented Japanese wrestler getting a push could only help WWE's appeal overseas.
66. Epico and Primo win in another quick match, WWE is really not giving anyone much ring time tonight.
67. Bryan is backstage talking to Henry about how he respects him.
68. He wants Henry to take out Show tonight so it can be a one on one match at the Rumble.
69. I think I liked Bryan's first shirt better than his new one.
70. Barrett is out after the commercial talking about how he took out Orton several weeks earlier.
71. First we get Booker making a Willis joke and now Barrett is making an Urkle joke? Older sitcoms are getting some love tonight.
72. Orton looks a bit skinnier than the last time we saw him as he comes down to the ring.
73. They meet on the ramp and Orton goes right to work on Barrett.
74. Reks, Hawkins, Baretta and the Usos come down to try and break up the fight.
75. Barrett runs and Orton RKOs all five of the other guys in the ring.
76. Kind of a strange segment since most of the guys he hit RKOs on were baby faces, although Orton has never been known to care one way or the other if someone is a good guy or bad guy.
77. When we come back from commercial we see Daniel Bryan talking to, I wanna say Maxine, about doing a favor for AJ.
78. He wants her to let Show know Henry is going to try and injure him tonight.
79. She wants to know how Bryan really feels about AJ.
80. He deflects and she agrees to talk to Show anyways.
81. Looks like Bryan is trying to make sure he doesn't have an opponent for Sunday.
82. Hunico and Camacho are on their low-rider bike coming to the ring for a match with DiBiase.
83. DiBiase really needs a new theme song, this one just does not fit his personality at all as a baby face.
84. His wrist is taped up tonight.
85. Hunico and DiBiase are having a better match than I would have expected given how short it was.
86. Camacho gets in some shots on DiBiase after Hunico wins with a nice spinning slam maneuver.
87. Hunico stomps on DiBiase's wrist while Camacho holds it down on the steel steps.
88. I still don't get why WWE didn't have Hunico stays with Epico, Primo and Rosa.
89. We go backstage where the Noir nympho is talking to Teddy.
90. Natalya wants another match with Tamina and Aksana kind of rubs in the loss from last week.
91. Wow, a little bit of a non PG moment.
92. Natalya says she will beat that whack job and Aksana says "Whack Job? What I do with Teddy in private is..." before Long cuts her off.
93. Long makes a match between Aksana and Natalya.
94. What the hell, someone, possibly Natalya, farts.
95. HAHAHAHAHA, Santino walks in and gags, saying "Oh it's in my mouth." Then he runs out of the room, classic.
96. I am sorry but at heart I am still a four year old kid who thinks fart jokes are funny, especially out of place fart jokes.
97. They hype Brodus Clay being on next, I like that they are getting behind him, this gimmick is great.
98. It looks like Clay gets a big pop as he comes out, but who knows how the crowd ever really reacts on SmackDown.
99. Shucky Ducky Quack Quack, I love Brodus Clay's dancers.
100. Alex Riley getting his first match on SmackDown in God knows how long.
101. Riley looks like he likes the gimmick.
102. Riley tries some moves and Brodus responds with his now trademark shimmy.
103. He tricks Riley with a fake high five before hitting his three big moves and pinning Riley.
104. I like Clay but he needs to start having some longer matches with more established stars.
105. Thank God Cena doesn't wear the baby blue shirt from that Fruity Pebbles box.
106. After another commercial they replay Ryder's beat down at the hands of Kane from Monday.
107. I cannot remember WWE ever reshowing an entire match on another show in the same week like this.
108. Were they really running that short on time, they clearly had wrestlers willing to work some longer matches.
109. Natalya is in the ring as the Onyx Jessica Rabbit makes her way to the ring in what can only be described as the most interesting entranceI have seen in some time.
110. Booker is going nuts for her, looks like he is trying to get divorced.
111. Aksana gets the win in what might be the fastest match in WWE history. Even Backlund vs Diesel took longer and that was 8 seconds long.
112. Natalya attacks her after the match but Tamina comes out and takes her out.
113. Big Show comes out next for his match with Mark Henry.
114. Bryan comes out to watch from ringside.
115. It's really strange that Booker is defending Daniel Bryan and Cole is admonishing him since Bryan is a heel.
116. I guess Big Show won during the commercial break.
117. Bryan attacks Show with a chair but gets fought off.
118. Bryan eventually gets the advantage and locks in the Labell lock.
119. Show breaks free and gives Bryan a much deserved Choke Slam.
120. The Show ends with Big Show standing tall on top of the ramp.
121. I really could not predict who will win the match on Sunday, but I hope they allow Bryan to finally get a real win with the World Title on the line.