|Noun||1.||vibe - a distinctive emotional aura experienced instinctively; "that place gave me bad vibrations"; "it gave me a nostalgic vibe"|
(Courtesy of http://www.thefreedictionary.com/vibe )
Oh that word, the vibe. It's hard to think of another word that can exemplify harsh superstitions or just a feeling of oncoming dread. It's nearly impossible to shake off a vibe unless everything goes over swimmingly.
As a Colts fan, I know I have little to complain about given the regular-season success and the Super Bowl ring. It's understandable why other franchises would love just to see their team make a Divisional Playoff Game, let alone win a Super Bowl.
Maybe I've been spoiled by their regular-season successes or such. But I think I can speak for most of the fans of any sport (from the NFL to the IRL) when I say, we've been down this road before.
With the exception of that iconic (in Colts fans minds) playoff run two seasons ago, it's been a bit of a bumpy road for the Colts in the playoffs. One week you'll see Peyton Manning light up a secondary, the next you will see a team dismantled by a "puny" running back by today's standards.
It's tortorous when you have a top team and just see them crumble. At least do the effort to blow us out.
But then comes failure. How terrible of a feeling is that? In society, our sports teams are such a vital piece to our construct as it's almost an antidote. Who's had a bad day and just sat down and watched a sporting event and everything seemed right? I'd bet the farm that nearly everyone has been there before.
Our sports teams may change in rosters, but they don't change in familiarity. (DISCLAIMER: Unless you're team is relocated)
They usually are always there for us when the season comes around. Thanks to the Internet, there's always news about them. There's a draft to look forward to, a free agent signing period to speculate about and a training camp to sweat out. For Hamels' sake, there's even fantasy leagues to keep us afloat.
But I write this as failure just slapped me across the face silly. As I watched drive after drive stall, and the momentum scales slightly tip to San Diego; a new feeling hit me: numbness.
I used to be a verbally passionate fan. I'd hit things, scream at the TV or even think of the asinine. Never anything that ever involved Jim Sorgi, but enough to get you thinking "Am I stupid?" afterwards.
But this feeling? Terrible. It was worse than anger, at least that will subside. I just sat in my chair and stared. The game wasn't over but my feelings were pretty set on not showing much. I had that feeling, that vibe, in me that this game would probably not go well.
Wasn't I right? It almost felt like a preseason game where you don't care as long as we all are healthy, but you still don't like losing.
In no way has my fanhood receded in anyway. But man, this feeling truly was a new low. Sure you can always say, "it's just a game". But it's not.
It's a way of life.