It would have to take some kind of earth-shattering, monumental, groin-grabbingly amazing event in the world of professional wrestling to make me write another historical analysis article.
After all, since joining the ranks of this publication website, I've been up and down and even disappeared more often than The Undertaker.
Of course, it may not be anything that major at all. It may just be time for the Royal Rumble.
For those not in the know, I've been documenting the Royal Rumble since I was a little kid, as it has always been my hands-down favorite event in wrestling history. My first five articles on Bleacher Report were about the Royal Rumble. Roughly 20 percent of the articles I've written on the topic of WWE have been about the Royal Rumble.
While the Royal Rumble match is the main contributor to such a devotion, I feel it only appropriate to show appreciation and acknowledge the incredible under card to an event that is about to host its 25th rodeo.
Though I don't acknowledge anniversaries quite like WWE does (to quote Seymour Skinner: "I wasn't principal when I was one!"), I do feel that a top 25 list will encompass the best of the best when it comes to those Rumble matches that, well, aren't Rumble matches.
From tag team landmarks to major title changes; from bloody owner brawls to gravely warfare, this countdown has it all.
No longer will you simply fast-forward (do kids still do that?) through your old Rumble videos to watch the big battle royal. Instead, you may just stop and take pause at the appetizer before the main course.
Let's begin, shall we?