Ranking the Most Quotable Head Coaches in College Football

College football coaches are judged on their win-loss record, their performance in clutch situations and how they fare on the recruiting trail. Being a great quote is just a really nice bonus.

There are some coaches in the game today that have a knack for spouting out memorable lines during press conferences and other interviews. Often these come in the heat of the moment, usually in reaction to an unexpected event, but they also come as a result of that coach's sense of humor and personality.

Whatever the reason, when a microphone or tape recorder is nearby we're all ears, eagerly anticipating the next great quip or one-liner.

Here's our ranking of the most quotable college football coaches in the game today, ranked based on how memorable their lines tend to be as well as the reactions they provoke.

8. Nick Saban, Alabama

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While the best quotes in college football lean toward the humor end of the spectrum, Alabama's Nick Saban is more of a thought provoker when it comes to his most memorable lines. As one of the most well-regarded coaches in the game today, he's become known for using the podium to champion causes and push for rule changes, and in the process he'll say something that sticks.

In 2014, he championed the push for rule changes that would slow down uptempo teams, citing safety concerns, though that never resulted in any adjustments. This year, his cause seems to be changing how and when potential NFL players receive their draft evaluation grades. Currently those grades come out between the end of the regular season and teams' bowl or playoff games, which Saban feels can lead to distractions.

"We're trying to get ready for a game, and all of a sudden, a guy finds out he's a first-round draft pick or a guy that thought he was a first-round draft pick finds out he's not a first-round draft pick, and we're trying to get ready to play a playoff game," Saban said last week during SEC media days, per Bleacher Report's Christoper Walsh.

Saban rarely seems happy about having to speak to the media, instead treating it like a necessary evil. This sometimes results in him scoffing at a question thrown his way and getting either defensive or aggressive depending on the subject matter.

Whatever the result, Saban's words are always closely monitored and then later deciphered ad nauseum.

7. Dan Mullen, Mississippi State

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Even before raving about being "swagged up" and having "a little sock game going" thanks to his fancy shoes worn at SEC media days, Mississippi State's Dan Mullen had become a fast riser in the quote rankings thanks to his down-home style and charm despite having been born in Pennsylvania.

A self-proclaimed "Yankee" who has infiltrated the South, Mullen tends to be at his best when he's reacting to something odd. A great example came last year when, while reading "mean tweets" on ESPN's College GameDay show, he dropped a memorable (NSFW) line from the classic Chevy Chase movie Christmas Vacation.

Mullen had this style before leading the Bulldogs to a 9-0 start and the No. 1 ranking in the country last year, and it's remained since then. He hasn't become more tight-lipped in light of the added attention his program has gotten. In reality he's actually opened up more.

And we thank him greatly for that.

6. Jim Harbaugh, Michigan

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Jim Harbaugh has yet to coach a game at Michigan, let alone win one, but he's already the most famous Wolverines coach since Bo Schembechler. He's making a run for topping Schembechler in the quote game, too, but doing so in a far more modern way.

Since taking the job at his alma mater in December, Harbaugh has made countless public appearances and been the subject of hundreds of interviews. And nearly every time he's said something memorable, whether on purpose or not.

At his introductory press conference, Harbaugh scoffed at the notion he was a savior who needed to pick up a broken program, telling reporters that "there are no turnarounds at Michigan. This is greatness."

When discussing the start of his first spring practice at Michigan with reporters, Harbaugh praised it like it was the greatest thing since...well, the dawn of time:

"

It's like Thanksgiving. It's like New Year's Day. It's like a family reunion. And having it all rolled into one. Most people think of January 1st as the start of a new year. To people who espouse to Catholicism and Christianity, they might correlate that with the birth of Christ. Us in football, the start of spring practice and the first day of summer training camp are what you look at as the New Year with fireworks going off, it's your birthday. It's being born back into football, it's a happening.

"

But where Harbaugh has made his biggest mark, quote-wise, is through social media. Already a Twitter superstar with more than 288,000 followers, his tweets are all over the place but rarely forgettable.

5. Bret Bielema, Arkansas

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We've been turned on by what Bret Bielema has had to say long before he said taking a knee late in the bowl win over Texas was "borderline erotic." That just sent us over the edge.

Since coming to Arkansas in late 2012—in a shocking move from a very good thing he had in Wisconsin—the sizable Bielema has mocked his own weight, described the magnificence of one of his players' butts and justified putting his offensive linemen on the media guide cover because "selfishly, it's because it's the only group that I feel good about taking a picture with. That's why they got vaulted into one spot."

Before getting the Razorbacks into a bowl game in his second season, lines like this would just seem like a way to deflect attention from his team's performance on the field. But now that Arkansas is on the rise, we know it's how things are going to be with Bielema, and that's quite all right by us.

4. Mike Leach, Washington State

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Mike Leach might not be able to have the same kind of success at Washington State that he had previously at Texas Tech, but that doesn't extend to his quote game. If anything, being sequestered in Southeast Washington, far away from most major media outlets, has probably added to the eccentricity that comes out nearly every time Leach opens his mouth.

And occasionally what he says has something to do with football. But when given the chance to speak freely—or to steer a question away from its original area—he will...and at length. Just check out some of his highlights from Pac-12 media days in 2014.

Considering this is a man whose interests range from pirates to Geronimo, and everything in between, his varied subject matter during quotes shouldn't be surprising. But he does have a keen football mind, too, albeit one that comes out with different words than most.

For instance, when explaining how he goes about searching for the right quarterback, he said accuracy is his most important attribute because he doesn't believe it's something that can be taught.

"It seems to me, somewhere in the backyard, around sixth grade, a guy's accurate or he's not," Leach said earlier this year on ESPN Radio in Baton Rouge, Louisiana (h/t Chris Vannini of CoachingSearch.com). "He might belong at quarterback or he might not. Some guys just throw more accurately."

3. Les Miles, LSU

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Whether he's expounding on the health benefits of grass smoothies or describing rain at Tiger Stadium as "a stiff dew," listening to Les Miles talk never gets dull.

"You never know what Miles is going to say from one question to the next, and you're always on the edge of your seat waiting for what could be the next classic "Madhatter" moment," wrote Nick Cole of SaturdayDownSouth.com.

LSU's coach hasn't been winning as many games the last few seasons as fans would like, but that hasn't slowed down his fondness for dropping a great line on us. If anything, he has become saucier of late, like when he called out those in the crowd during the last day of SEC media days for seeming disinterested in wanting to be there.

"It appears to me that some of the media have not shaved and have left their car running in the back parking lot, kind of ready to get off to fishing or wherever they're supposed to be off to," Miles told reporters.

Miles is incredibly quick on his feet, or when his foot won't come off the pedal, like when he ran a red light while doing an in-vehicle interview with ESPN's Kaylee Hartung. He claims he didn't commit any traffic violations, though, rather he "anticipated the change" from red to green.

2. Art Briles, Baylor

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More a champion ranter than a quotesmith, Art Briles' best lines tend to be ones where he's railing against something and ends up doing so in a way that causes jaws to drop and heads to shake. In a good way, of course.

This week at the Big 12 media days was no different, as Briles managed to equate complacency as a coach to being a criminal that follows the same routine each time while also referring to himself as a baby who should have his blanket taken away if he acts up. 

But Briles can also sling out the country phrases with the best of them, tapping into his Texas roots and his long history coaching in the state. When he was asked about how Seth Russell would do at quarterback, replacing the very successful Bryce Petty, he explained that the system is in place for Russell to do just as well.

However, he said it much more colorfully:

"This guy, he's walking into a situation where that saddle is going to get on there pretty easy, because that horse isn't that wild," Briles told reporters. "We're pretty settled."

1. Steve Spurrier, South Carolina

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We don't know how much longer we'll have Steve Spurrier around in the coaching ranks, but as long as he's a part of the game the Old Ball Coach will likely be locked into the No. 1 spot when it comes to quotability. Whether it's in the form of a rant, a gripe, a spate of self-deprecation or (most commonly) a shot across the bow of an opponent, Spurrier is never lacking for great lines.

The man who dubbed Florida State "Free Shoes University" and who pointed out that "you can't spell Citrus without U-T" hasn't slowed down even as he's reached his 70s. And he certainly doesn't avoid conflict, as evidenced by his desire to call an impromptu press conference on Wednesday to address things recently written about him that he didn't care for.

He also used that as an opportunity to reiterate that he has no plans to retire, a week after saying at SEC media days that he wished note oddsmaker Danny Sheridan would set lines on which coaches in the league would still be around in four years because "it would be fun to bet on."

"I should have answered this a week ago but I heehawed around," Spurrier told reporters at the press conference.

Here's hoping Spurrier continues to "heehaw" around when recording devices are within reach for quite some time.

Follow Brian J. Pedersen on Twitter at @realBJP.