College Football's 10 Most Ridiculously Named Bowl Games
December means hilarity.
College football bowl games only add to the laughter.
For smaller-name schools, bowl season is a chance to see one's beloved college do battle one more time in a holiday battle of wills. For the bigger schools, the focus is on after the new year, when top schools vie for some of the most storied trophies in all of college football.
But with 35 bowl games on the schedule, there's sure to be some occasions for fans to wonder whether or not it's worth it to be playing for such a ridiculously named event.
Here now is our list of the 10 most ridiculously named bowl games of the season.
May the snickering begin.
No. 10: R+L Carriers New Orleans Bowl
Chris Graythen/Getty Images
Because when I think of New Orleans, I think of really big trucks, loading and offloading in a shipping frenzy across the country.
For the clout that this game usually gets (read: none), it's tough to imagine the truck carrier industry gaining much from the endorsement of such a relatively meaningless bowl game.
As the New Orleans Bowl heads into its 10th year—previously known as the Wyndham Hotels New Orleans Bowl—it's become clear that a quarterback must enter the Mercedes-Benz Superdome and be ready to win.
The last five MVPs of this game? All quarterbacks.
Still, you'd think a company specializing in freight transportation would make for a more meaningful sponsor. Instead, they begin the first of three bowl games in the Superdome, although this one is admittedly the most ridiculous.
No. 9: New Era Pinstripe Bowl
Syracuse celebrates their 36-34 victory over Kansas State in the inaugural Pinstripe Bowl last year.
Chris McGrath/Getty Images
This one's new, and it's made to celebrate the fact that the new Yankee Stadium is huge.
Kansas State and Syracuse gave fans a show to remember in the inaugural New Era Pinstripe Bowl last year, with the Orange pulling it out, 36-34.
But this column isn't about the games themselves.
Seriously, New Era Pinstripe? This shameless attempt to legitimize the fact that the Yankees tore down "The House That Ruth Built" in favor of a new Bronx behemoth just comes off as greasy.
The Yankees are known by their pinstripes, but there's a new stadium and, hence, a New Era. I get it.
No. 8: Meineke Car Care of Texas Bowl
This is a new one. Replacing the now-defunct Texas Bowl (which screams football), Meineke takes their first stab at a Houston bowl game, following a 40-year legacy that began with the Bluebonnet Bowl in 1959.
But the "Meineke Car Care Bowl....of Texas" doesn't have the same ring. This seems to scream desperation on the part of Meineke, but we won't fault them for wanting to cash in on college football dollars.
No, it's best we leave them be—after all, it's Texas.
No. 7: Military Bowl Presented by Northrup Grumman
Celebrating the marriage of our young men and women in uniform with the new-age strategy of war by contractors, the Military Bowl Presented by Northrup Grumman follows in the footsteps of the Eaglebank Bowl, already a ridiculous name for a bowl game.
But this odd mix of troops and contractors won't distract from the fact that football is war.
It just is. And making that point blatant only lends to the ridiculousness.
No. 6: Bridgepoint Education Holiday Bowl
The Holiday Bowl used to mean something; it was a bowl named for the sake of husbands and sons everywhere.
After all, who wants to question the importance of something called the "Holiday Bowl?" One can't possibly be asked to break their concentration from something so obviously tied to football and overall merriment.
Pacific Life used to sponsor this bowl game, and it made sense. Life insurance and football go together like cars and football. This game has featured the likes of Jim McMahon, Terrell Suggs and Colt McCoy all winning MVP honors. It's the game and the name that epitomize college football.
Then Bridgepoint Education, a for-profit college company recently under investigation by the U.S. Senate, got involved to the tune of sponsoring this event—and it's lost its luster.
Besides, why would an education company sponsor something about a holiday?
Make up your minds! Vacation or trigonometry?!?
No. 5: Famous Idaho Potato Bowl
Otto Kitsinger III/Getty Images
Because potatoes and blue turf don't go together.
This game is played in Bronco Stadium in Boise, home of the Broncos of Boise State. It was known as the Humanitarian Bowl, but now that stupid blue turf has its own bowl game.
Here's looking at you, Boise. Well, not really—that blue hurts my eyes. Get a real field.
No. 4: Franklin American Mortgage Music City Bowl
Because mortgages and music go together like....
Mortgages and music.
No. 3: San Diego County Credit Union Poinsettia Bowl
Because local credit unions and poinsettias go together like...
You know where I'm going with this.
No. 2: Godaddy.com Bowl
Is this a ridiculously named bowl game? Yes.
Is the selection of this bowl game partially an excuse to use this picture in the slideshow?
Are you questioning me?
Are you there?
Honorable Mention: Taxslayer.com Gator Bowl
Rick Dole/Getty Images
Last year, this game was sponsored by Progressive, but now Taxslayer.com has the hosting honors this year.
(I can't include it in the normal list because everyone still calls it the Gator Bowl.)
In fact, for most of these slides, the shorthand name of the bowl is acceptable, but the sponsors seem a bit odd.
This year, though, there's one bowl that left everyone else in the dust, at least in terms of sheer ridiculousness.
No. 1: Kraft Fight Hunger Bowl
Okay, before I get a deluge of comments about how I'm pro-suffering or somehow against the idea of giving to charity or of alleviating poverty, it's not the cause I object against. Fighting hunger is one of the more fundamentally noble aims, and who better than Kraft to lead the charge?
The thing is, bowl games should be about the players, the athletes, coaches and staff who make up two evenly-matched colleges squaring off in front of a nationwide audience. It's their moment in the sun.
This bowl will not be remembered for the play on the field, but for the cause it promotes. And while it's a noble one, I'd feel upset about playing in a bowl game where the achievements on the field don't matter. It's a shame to the players of this bowl who are looking for one more chance to steal the national spotlight.
This is the bowl game version of those Sarah McLachlan commercials where she breaks your heart with slow-motion video of abused cats and dogs. I mean, I'm with you in general on being anti-animal abuse, but do you have to rub it in my face?
That's all I'm saying.