NCAA Football Week 1: Get Your Beer and Have a Seat
Football fans across the country have anticiapted the very second that the ball lifts off the tee and leaves the foot. The unknown is nerve racking, yet continues to feed to biased points of view and team research.
My research has led me to the ultimate Week 1 program guide of what to watch and when. Follow this simple, at times, guide and your opening weekend of college football will be considered a success...unless your team sucks.
Opening Night (sweet): Thursday, September 2, 2010
The guy that would hang out with me would definitely preplan (pregame) for this date. Last minute requests off from work will not suffice, and don't count on it due to most managerial positions being held by supporters of Stanford and Vanderbilt-ish teams; which in all reality means they don't care about football.
Prior to game time one must fill the cupboard full of readily accessible adult beverages.
Game 1 (Warm Up): Presbyterian at Wake Forest on ESPN3.com at 6:30 PM ET
Since most do not care to much about either team, this game is used for drinking only. Every time the announcer says: Jim Grobe (finish your drink). Since this is the only common name, take is easy.
Game 2 (Tough Call)- Marshall at No. 2 Ohio State on Big Ten Network at 7:30 PM ET
If you don't have Big Ten Network, I would recommend the Minnesota at Middle Tennessee State game on ESPNU (same time).
Ohio State and Terrell Pryor will absolutely destroy Marshall, even though I do believe the No. 2 ranking is a little high. Consider this a good thing; every time Terrelle Pryor assists or scores a TD, finish your drink (don't take it easy).
For those who question the Minnesota at Middle Tennessee State game, this is one of the biggest home games MTSU has ever had. In addition, MTSU is predicted to compete for the Sun Belt Conference.
Tweener Night (Holdover Games): Friday, September 3 2010
Game 1 (Not Interesting): Villanova at Temple on ESPN3.com at 5:00 PM ET
I'm gonna say every time the 50 is crossed (including punts), funnel something. That's the only way this game could be entertaining.
Game 2 (Not Interesting): Arizona at Toledo on ESPN at 8:00 PM ET
Congrats, this game is on ESPN, because nobody else is playing. If you are still alive after the first game, then I recommend you stop drinking and admit yourself.
Actual Gameday (No Holds Barred): Saturday, September 4 2010
Game 1 (Blowout): Miami (OH) at No. 4 Florida at 12:00 PM ET on ESPN
This game is only interesting because everyone wants to see how Florida will operate without Tebow at the helm (drink throughout at a moderate pace, to ensure complete satisfaction of opening Saturday).
Game 2 (hmmm): Purdue at Notre Dame at 3:30 PM ET on NBC
There are a lot of question marks in this game: Purdue's quarterback and Notre Dame's new coach. Drink heavily at this game because there are a lot of Catholics in attendance.
Game 3/4 (Flip Between): No. 24 Oregon State vs. No. 6 TCU at 7:45 PM ET on ESPN and No. 21 LSU vs. No. 18 North Carolina
TCU is over-ranked and North Carolina will pull from the basketball team to make it competitive (due to suspensions). During these games, completely let it go. If you feel like punching a hole in your wall, I dare you to see if you can make it through the other side.
If you follow this guide you will have an enjoyable first weekend of college football. There are a million factors that could make or break this guide, i.e. your team sucks but you're blinded by preseason hype and the gushing newpaper reports from summer camp.
I will end with this: good luck to all, congratulations the season is upon us, and don't ever plan on driving away after drinking from any establishment!
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