Iowa's Norm Parker Not a Fan of Retirement or Twitter

At 68 years of age, Iowa's defensive coordinator Norm Parker is entering his 12th year as an assistant at Iowa.

He has no intentions of stopping anytime soon, either.

Prior to the 2010 Big Ten Media Days, rumors began circulating that Parker would retire at the end of the season. The rumors sent minor shock-waves through the Hawkeye fan-base.

When asked about the retirement rumors, head coach Kirk Ferentz joked with the media.

"I was a little upset because I was hoping he’d tell me, maybe, before the media," Ferentz laughed at with the media. "I saw Norm last week. He’s fired up, ready to go. And I think he’s ready for camp, excited about this year. And he’s never indicated any thought of quitting."

Ferentz later added with a smile, "we should just check his Facebook or Twitter page and see what he's saying." 

At Iowa's Media Day last week, Parker put the rumors to rest.

"I don’t have any intention of retiring," Parker proclaimed. “The only two ways I’ll leave is if they carry me out or Kirk will fire me. One of the two.”

Don't look for Ferentz to be handing the beloved defensive coordinator a pink slip anytime soon. Under Parker, the Hawkeyes have ranked among the top ten in the nation for rushing defense four times.

For Ferentz to even consider firing his coordinator, Parker would likely have to go on a serial killer-like rampage that would make Showtime's Dexter look like a complete noob.

Retirement rumors have been a recurring theme over the last few years. 

Due to a long, ongoing fight with Diabetes, Parker has had multiple surgeries on his feet. As a result, he has performed his duties from the press box on occasion last year and will continue that trend throughout the year this season.

For Parker, the idea of retirement is a scary thought. If it were ever to happen, it likely wouldn't stick for very long.

"I’d probably end up volunteering at some high school just to be around the smell of the locker room," Parker explained.

The veteran coach has no idea how the rumors got started, but made it be known it wasn't through his own social media efforts.

"Believe me, if you talk about Facebook or Twitter, I'm the last guy in the world," Parker stated. "I don't even know how to work the remote on the TV at home, let alone Twitter. 

"When the guys said they heard it on Twitter, they laughed. I'm the last guy. The technical world passed me by long ago."

Parker says he isn't what most people would label as sophisticated.

"I’d be a good hillbilly.”