Why Do You Suppose? A College Football Fan Is Consumed with Questions

BabyTateSenior Writer IFebruary 6, 2009

In the big business world of sports, we often find odd situations and events seeming to defy common sense.

These actions are not limited to any one sport, any classification, or any region. More and more, the unusually strange seems to be the rule of the day.

Please take the following examples under consideration.

1) Why do you suppose the new football coach at Tennessee is rocking the boat with fellow SEC coaches?

This fellow, Lane Kiffin, was a complete disaster as the Oakland Raiders coach. A prior Oakland coach, Bill Callahan, drove the Raiders franchise into the ground.

After securing employment at Nebraska, Callahan destroyed the legendary Cornhusker program. Kiffin is unsure of his ability and is screaming at others to hide his insecurity.

2) Why do you suppose Michael Phelps allowed himself to get into such a situation in South Carolina?

Maybe he's friends with Kiffin. Quite honestly, the fellow appears to have thought he could be the world's greatest athletic hero and not have any responsibility with the position.

Maybe he didn't give it a great deal of thought; could be there have been many doors opened for him through his fame and success. He has learned the hard lesson of life: If you are ever on a pedestal, do not fall off. To do so risks all you have gained.

3) Who would win a popularity contest between Kobe Bryant, Tony Stewart, Terrell Owens, Barry Bonds, Michael Vick, and Roger Clemens?

This is self-explanatory.

4) Why do you suppose more SEC football head coaches are from outside the South than from the region?

It seems odd that the self-described greatest football conference has to go outside the area for two-thirds of the coaches in the league.

The only SEC school that has produced a current SEC head coach is the University of Florida. Both South Carolina coach Steve Spurrier and Auburn coach Gene Chizik played football for the Gators. Georgia coach Mark Richt played at Miami and Vanderbilt coach Bobby Johnson played at Clemson—both ACC schools. Those four are the only ones who graduated from Southern schools. 

Ole Miss coach Houston Nutt graduated from Oklahoma State, Florida coach Urban Meyer went to Cincinnati, Alabama coach Nick Saban is a Kent State man, and LSU coach Les Miles played in the Big House for Michigan.

To add to the list, Kentucky coach Rich Brooks went to Oregon State, Kiffin to Fresno State, Mississippi State coach Dan Mullen graduated from Ursinus, and Arkansas coach Bobby Petrino went to Carroll College in Montana.

5) Why do you suppose Notre Dame has only played Indiana once in the past 50 years in football, even though they are located in the same state?

Is this a matter of snubbing a program? Do they not wish to compete with their neighbors? Then why play Purdue consistently?

6) Why do you suppose the campuses of only two Southern state universities are located in the actual capital of that state?

The University of South Carolina (Columbia) and the University of Texas (Austin) are located in the state capital.

Florida, Georgia, Kentucky, Tennessee, North Carolina, Virginia, Maryland, Mississippi, Arkansas, Alabama, and Louisiana are all located in other towns. Louisiana is so nutty, they have eight University of Louisiana campuses throughout the state.

I guess it is a good thing for the residents there, but everyone I've ever known considers LSU the university of Louisiana. Live and learn.

7) Why do you suppose someone said, "A tiger can not change its stripes"?

Whomever uttered that phrase never had a look at college football uniforms. The Tigers of Missouri are black and gold, the Tigers of Princeton are orange and black, and the Tigers of Clemson and Auburn are orange and blue, with some white on the uniform.

I hate to break this to the supposed "big boys," but I believe Princeton is correct in the matter. Gotta hand it to the eggheads when it comes to knowing your animal colors.

When we get these seven matters settled, we can start with other big-picture issues, such as what is the name of the bowl game where the BCS Championship is played?

What a country.


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