Baron Davis should just shrink down inside that car so nobody can see through the tinted windows.
He came home to Los Angeles and was widely thought to be a turning point for the downtrodden Clippers franchise, but instead turned out to be everyone's favorite punch line.
But his contract isn't even the worst.
It may surprise you to see who is number one on this list.
Contract: 5 years, $55 million
Gordon was supposed to come to Detroit and stretch the floor for the Pistons.
Instead, he's spent the majority of his time stretching his hamstrings on the bench. He hasn't resembled the player that he was in Chicago at all.
Contract: 5 years, $70 million
One of the bigger wastes, Hughes never met a shot that he didn't like and wound up hurting the Cavs after coming in.
He was supposed to be LeBron's wing man, but just because a team overpays a guy doesn't make him a legitimate number two scoring option.
Contract: 6 years, $86 million
When AK-47 signed his extension, it looked like it may even be a bargain for the Jazz.
Now? It's a massive migraine. Kirilenko has regressed in every season since landing the big bucks, and he'll never reach his full potential.
Contract: 5 years, $30 million
If Isaiah Thomas' tenure in New York wasn't legendarily awful, James would be a lot higher on this list.
But really, $6 million per season for a reserve center with less skill than Joel Anthony? Please.
Contract: 5 years, $64 million
Stojakovic was on the verge of being one of the greatest European players of all time, but then he signed in New Orleans.
He played just 13 games in his inaugural season with the club and soured his relationship with the front office rather quickly as a result.
Contract: 6 years, $63 million
Despite the fact that Biedrins is still just 25 years old, there isn't a talent evaluator in the league looking to roll the dice on this guy.
A horrific free throw shooter with absolutely no offensive skills, it's no wonder he's not exactly a coveted asset.
Contract: 6 years, $91 million
Maybe Michael Redd should have taken less money to go play alongside LeBron in Cleveland.
The former 20-point per night scorer has played a combined 61 games over the last three seasons, which put him firmly in the running for the highest paid player in the league on a per-minute basis.
Contract: 6 years, $32.4 million
I know that talented big men are at a premium in the NBA, but why do general managers seem to have an affinity for overpaying the marginal talent as well?
Diop is a solid backup, capable of playing 15-20 minutes per game (when he's not hurt), but to invest over $5 million per season over such a long amount of time makes absolutely no sense.
Contract: 5 years, $31 million
Similar to Diop, Mohammed is a great veteran backup to have at the end of the bench.
But when your expiring contract is the most attractive element to your game for an NBA team, it might be time to admit that you're making more than you probably should be.
Contract: 5 years, $82 million
After signing a lucrative extension that cemented his status as the face of the Portland franchise, Brandon Roy's NBA future is still very much an uncertainty.
Despite finding limited success this season with his balky knees, Roy's doctors have already called his injury woes "chronic", and it's not looking promising that he'll enjoy a miraculous comeback.
Contract: 6 years, $64 million
Dalembert has played well when given the opportunity, but after signing his fat contract with Philadelphia, he became an unwanted commodity and was shipped off of the team.
Defensively he's still a presence inside, but if you're making more than $10 million per season, you should be a prolific contributor on offense, too.
Contract: 6 years, $110.1 million
The saga of T-Mac.
Once in the middle of the conversation to be the best wing player in the NBA, McGrady's fall from grace might be one of the saddest stories to ever grace the hardwood.
The injuries sapped his explosiveness, and he'll always be remembered as one of the most overpaid players of his generation.
Contract: 6 years, $42 million
Now this one is a head-scratcher.
A defensive specialist who should never see more than 10 minutes of court time per game, Foyle's asinine extension speaks to the whacked-out salary structure of the sport.
Just think, Foyle signed his deal in 2004, and we haven't seen any improvement on contracts in the NBA.
Contract: 7 years, $91 million
Martin should be in prison for grand theft considering all of the money he's stolen during his NBA career.
He has NEVER played a full slate of games (career-high 77 in 2002-03) and managed to appear in a lousy two games in 2006-07.
Oh, and did I mention he's never even averaged a double-double? Yeah, that's a sound investment.
Contract: 5 years, $65 million
Well, it looked like a good deal on paper when the Clippers signed Davis, but the game isn't played on paper.
An out-of-shape, overpaid Baron took his first year in Los Angeles for granted, and he never was able to win the fans back after that.
Contract: 6 years, $60 million
Curry has no business making more money in one season than most people do in the tenure of their professional careers.
He should be considered one of the biggest busts in NBA history considering he was the fourth overall pick in the 2001 draft, and it's likely that he'll never be able to escape that stigma.
Contract: 6 years, $111 million
Hey, I have a great idea.
Let's reward an over-the-hill superstar coming off of chronic knee problems with a maximum contract extension and make him the face of our already sinking franchise.
And now, the Wizards have Rashard Lewis as a result.
What a good deal.
Contract: 7 years, $51 million
When the Pacers went insane and gave Croshere this money, the team was seeking to lock up their young core of talent that helped propel them to the 2000 NBA Finals.
Clearly, they went overboard.
He did the dirty-work down low, but how that justifies to more than $7 million per season is beyond my level of comprehension.
Contract: 6 years, $80 million
"The Franchise" gave Houston fans something to be excited about for the future of the team.
Well, that didn't exactly work out.
After being shipped to Orlando from the Rockets, Francis enjoyed one good season before flaming out.
And his time with the Knicks? Tenuous. And that's putting it lightly.
Contract: 7 years, $70 million
How on earth did LaFrentz ever land such a bloated contract?
What did he do to deserve it? He parlayed his reputation as a defensive stopper in Denver into a huge deal with Dallas, and they gave up on him after just two seasons.
He's the poster boy for the expiring contract club, and that's not exactly a desirable title.
Contract: 5 years, $82 million
Brand spurned the Clippers for a chance to be a part of something bigger with the Sixers.
I wonder if he regrets his choice, but I know that Philadelphia wishes they hadn't given him the big money that they had.
He hasn't come close to resembling the player that he was with the Clippers, and both parties are probably wishing that this marriage never occurred.
Contract: 6 years, $110 million
Lewis was part of a sign-and-trade from the Seattle SuperSonics to the Orlando Magic in a deal that was supposed to make the Magic elite title contenders for the better part of the decade.
Now in 2011, Dwight Howard and Co. still don't have a ring. And Rashard Lewis isn't even on the team.
He and Arenas are the two most overpaid players currently still playing, so it's only natural that they were swapped for one another.
Contract: 4 years, $76 million
The extension looked like a good one for the Suns, but after he was dealt to the Knicks, the wheels completely came off of Marbury's train.
He enjoyed two decent seasons, but the team was never any good, and the brunt of the criticism fell on Marbury because he was the highest paid player.
Starbury became the iconic image for the Isaiah Thomas tenure in New York, and that's not a desirable title no matter how you look at it.
Contract: 7 years, $86 million
Brian Grant was a great role player who brought energy, defense and extreme effort to every team he ever played for.
But since when do role players deserve mega-bucks like this? Before signing his contract, he averaged 7.5 points and 5.5 rebounds per game.
Oh, now I see why he got paid.
Contract: 7 years, $126 million
Another player who never saw the court for a full 82, I can think of 126 million reasons why the Pacers regret re-signing the once-promising superstar.
O'Neal spent the final three seasons of his deal on the Raptors and Heat, and never has he ever looked like the player he was upon signing that insane contract.