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Fear the Beard: The Best and Worst Beards in the NBA

Andrew WallockContributor IJanuary 20, 2017

Fear the Beard: The Best and Worst Beards in the NBA

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    Beards, generally, are an acquired taste. Some people love them. Some people hate them. I, for one, love a good beard. Due to my inability to grow anything other than patchy peach fuzz, I admire those who can grow and maintain a fantastic growth of hair on their face.

    The fuller the beard the more amazing it is, in my humble opinion.

    So, for this article, I'd like to detail the worst beards as well as some of the best. There are some good beards out there. But there are also some hideous ones. So, without further adieu, let's check out what made this list. If I missed any, good or bad, let me know!

Worst: Mike D'Antoni

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    I don't consider Mike D'Antoni to be a very good coach and I also don't like the little number on his face either. That mustache just bugs me every time I see him. 

    I just can't take the guy seriously on or off the court. 

Worst: Chris Andersen

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    Coming in next is a downright nasty piece owned by the Denver Nuggets' own Chris Andersen. Chris is known for his hustle and heart—but also for his sketchy past. 

    In this case, I'd say less is more. Due to his somewhat blonde hair, the beard really comes across as dirty and unhygienic. Not only that, his tattoos up to his chin form a beard in their own right.

    Sorry, Mr. Andersen, I love a good beard, but yours is not one. 

Worst: Joakim Noah

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    Joakim Noah is a funny looking dude all around, and his beard isn't helping matters. By the picture we can tell it doesn't grow all the way in certain places, thus making Mr. Noah look a homeless man.

    Not only that, mustaches are never good unless kept trim. It looks like he's never seen a razor in his life. Come on Noah, you'd be a much better looking man if you kept your beard trim. Actually, scratch that, I don't know if there's any hope for you. 

Worst: Chris Kaman

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    Kaman has recently shaved this nasty growth, but I don't expect him to stay clean shaven for long. Easily one of the uglier players in the league, Kaman's beard essentially makes him look exactly like his nickname: a caveman.

    With the balding head and the unruly beard, we have ourselves one funky looking dude. 

Worst or Best: Spencer Hawes

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    Spencer Hawes' beard could go one of two ways. It would actually look fairly nice if he knocked away a little bit of that neck beard. 

    Where I come from, neck beard is never good. Get rid of that, and Spencer, you have yourself a fine-looking beard.  

Worst: JaVale McGee

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    No "Worst" list can possibly be complete without a mention of Javale McGee.

    The poor guy unwittingly always finds himself on any list talking about things that are bad. In this case, his facial hair is in question.

    It seems as if he's trying to pull off the chin strap with a mustache. In my opinion, McGee just needs to ditch the facial hair all together, because it's not helping us take him any more serious. But, at this point, I think it'd be impossible to take the guy seriously.

    Especially after you take a look at this.

Worst: Byron Mullens

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    Nasty mustache: Check.

    Unibrow: Check.

    Creepy smile: Check.

    Shaqtin' a Fool appearance: Check.

    I'm sorry, Byron. You don't have much going for you. Your "facial hair" isn't helping you out at all. 

Worst: Tayshaun Prince

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    The patchier the beard, the worse it looks.

    In this case, Tayshaun Prince isn't doing himself any favors. Not a great looking dude regardless, the beard makes him look a lot worse. He needs to ditch the facial hair sooner rather than later. 

Worst: Luis Scola

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    Luis Scola is one of my least favorite players and probably one of the weirdest looking guys in the NBA. I have yet to figure out his whole look, especially with the long, greasy hair and unruly beard. 

    He needs to trim that thing. He looks much better without it. Here's proof.

Worst: Pau Gasol

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    And of course, we must have a mention of Mister Gasol on this list. His beard is widely known as one of the worst in the NBA. It's a masterpiece and a mess all at the same time. 

    I could go on a long explanation about why his facial hair is terrible, but I am going to just sum it up to this following link. Click here now and be forever freaked out. 

Worst: Ronny Turiaf

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    While I may be a huge fan of Ronny Turiaf, I'm not a fan of Ronny Turiaf's beard. He needs to take some lessons from either Baron Davis or James Harden on how to pull off the thick beard. 

    It's almost there—but not quite. 

Best: Mike Woodson

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    Mike D'Antoni's recent replacement, Mike Woodson takes the cake for best beard amongst NBA coaches with a neatly trimmed full and think goatee.

    The thing is a beauty. Stan Van Guny and D'Antoni, you both could learn something from Mr. Woodson (both in facial hair AND coaching..). 

Best: Reggie Evans

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    Reggie Evans actually has something going for him here. I do enjoy the bald head that goes well with the neatly trimmed beard. He pulls it off really well.

    Reggie is one of my favorite guys to watch. Also, this picture struck me because I was shocked to see Jerry Stackhouse is still in the NBA. I thought he was like 50 years old. 

Best: Baron Davis

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    How can you not love Baron Davis' beard? It's perfectly trimmed and not too full. It's a look done right.

    Well done, Mr. Davis. 

Best: John Salmons

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    John Salmons receives a place atop the best beards list simply because of the uniqueness of his goatee. It's obvious he is trying to get something going here and has a clear vision.

    Regardless of its weirdness, at least he's trying, right? 

Best: Vince Carter

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    Vince Carter looks as if he meticulously trims and shaves his beard before every game. The picture even suggests that Shawn Marion can't take his eyes off the masterpiece that resides on Carter's face.

    If you're reading this Vince, I suggest you try to go the Seneca Crane route. You won't be sorry, and it'll just add to the greatness of your beard.  

Best: LeBron James

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    LeBron does get one thing right and that's his facial hair. Just like John Salmons, you can tell he has a style and a plan, and he keeps it clean every night. 

    Thanks, LeBron. Thanks for looking good every night. 

Best: Marc Gasol

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    Marc's beard looks so much better than his older brother Pau's. While it can look unruly at times, it seems he cares a lot more and keeps it much more well-kept. 

    And fortunately, he looks nothing like a llama. 

Best: Ricky Rubio

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    There's something about Ricky Rubio that just draws me in. Either it's his amazing passing abilities or it's his beard. Maybe it's both.

    Either way, the guy is a mastermind on the court, and I can't stop watching. 

Best: Vladimir Radmanovic

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    I don't know why I like Vlad's beard because I certainly don't like Vlad. Maybe I'm just jealous of his facial hair growing abilities. He has no patches anywhere and seems to keep it fairly nice on most nights. 

    But just like Jerry Stackhouse, I had no idea the guy was still playing. 

Best: Deron Williams

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    One of the classiest guys in the league and easily my favorite player to watch, Deron also sports a fantastic looking beard. 

    Man, does he pull off the professional look well or what? 

Best: Kevin Love

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    I used to not like the beard, but since he recently shaved it, I think he should definitely grow it back out.

    The shaved look makes him look 10 years younger, especially based on this picture from Yahoo Sports. It just doesn't work for you, Kevin. 

Best: James Harden

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    NBA fans, I introduce the winner of the best beard award: James Harden. 

    There is no explanation needed for his win. This beard is the real deal. 

    Opponents should definitely fear this beard—Especially Metta World Peace. 

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