It's so amazing to have football back in our lives. Like all fans, I celebrate the incredible athletes, the spectacular plays and the hard-hitting action.
We're still allowed to enjoy the hard-hitting action, right?
The safety police have allowed us at least that much, I hope. Forget red states and blue states. I feel like the nation is divided between people who still love football and the big-city intellectuals who are going to try to make us feel guilty about loving football.
When you rip it out of my dead hands, that's when you can have my football.
Anyway, in addition to all the great stuff that happens on a weekly basis, the kind of stuff that makes you happy to live in America and not some third-rate country where they watch bicycle races for entertainment, there is also a lot of goofiness.
Dumb coaches. Dumb players. Dumb announcers. And really dumb referees.
I'm here to celebrate these less than magical snapshots in time with you—14 of the worst moments of NFL Week 1. Enjoy, or, if they affected you or your team, enjoy banging your head into your desk one more time before gearing up for Week 2.