Cleveland Browns and Pat Shurmur: Inheriting a NFL Head Coach.

If you are a rabid Cleveland Browns’ fan, you probably know the following bare facts about your new Head Coach:

Born 1965, married to Jennifer (college sweetheart, thank you very much), four children.

He is not the son of Fritz Shurmur. The longtime Green Bay icon was his uncle.

Pat was an offensive lineman! He played both guard and linebacker as a freshman and then started at Center for the next three seasons at Michigan State. Wow. Now that goes to show you what amazing athletes professional linemen are: they are twice his size and probably quicker than Pat ever was.

Shurmur is the sixth new Browns’ Head Coach since 1999. The last truly successful coach was Schottenheimer. Pat was in college when Marty left Cleveland. Yeah, it’s been a while.

Pat gets a lot of credit for turning around the Rams’ offense in 2010. The squad improved in every major offensive category. Um, perhaps I underestimate Mr. Shurmur’s coaching brilliance, but don’t you think that had a teeny bit more to do with the arrival of Sam Bradford?

Prior to getting credit for Sam Bradford, Shurmur’s biggest claim to fame is as the QB coach for Donovan McNabb’s Philadelphia Eagles from 1999-2008. Now, I’m not quite sure what to make of that. Andy Reid completely neglects his quarterbacks once he picks them for their amazing talent. So, does this mean that McNabb’s success was self-preservation or the result of Shurmur’s guidance? We won’t know the answer to that until we see how well Colt does as he matures.

The word is that Browns' king Holmgren picked Shurmur because he wanted an offensively minded coach who would call his own plays the way that Mike used to.

I don’t like the whole Head Coach as play-caller deal. Those jobs are separated for a reason and unless you have an Assistant Head Coach who is dealing with overall game plan and clock management you are asking for trouble. Like the kind of trouble that lost Cleveland the game in Week 1.  I cannot help but think that Pat should have been paying total attention to his defense at that moment. But then, they didn’t ask me.

Shurmur wants to get the Browns’ offense started more quickly. Well, with Josh Cribbs still nursing injury, they can’t count on good field position. So, it’s going to be up to Colt and Peyton. And that O-line. Pat is on record as saying that the slow starts are because the offense hasn’t been executing well early in games. Uh, ya think?

Coach wants the squad to relax and not rush. I’m sorry, but based on how long McCoy was holding the ball and how slowly he was making decisions and how underwater the whole team looked, I’m not sure that “slowing down” is the direction we want to go in.

Why aren’t the runners getting 35 carries? It’s not as if they are incompetent. With hurt WRs, who weren’t top drawer to start with, and a baby QB, wouldn’t you think that you would be leaning on the run? You see why I'm not thrilled with that Philly connection?

Without a run, the Browns couldn’t hang onto the football. Miami had possession for almost 38 minutes last Sunday. The only good thing I can say about that is how impressed I was with the defense’s conditioning.

Let’s recap. Mike Holmgren is the control freak that left the Green Bay Packers because he wanted to be both Head Coach and GM in Seattle. He and Tom Heckert have had some successes with this offensive scheme, but am I the only one who thinks that this looks awfully as if Mike wants to control the offense by hiring a West Coast guy who will also call the plays? Doesn't this eliminate one more position between the field and Mike?

Am I the only one who thinks this is Pat Shurmur as QB/Head Coach hybrid?  Um, how did that work out for the Redskins? Yeah, not so well.

Holmgren picked the players (and does Colt McCoy not remind all of us of a Hasselbeck/Wallace splice?) Holmgren dictated the offensive scheme and now he’s hired a first time Head Coach. Honestly, Mike H. needs to be careful or he’s a black sweat suit away from Al Davis comparisons.

I don’t have anything against coaching trees, really. Belichick is a Parcells’ sprout; Holmgren, Mooch and Gruden are all football descendants of Bill Walsh. I think that football is one of the few worlds these days that actually values the knowledge of our elders. This is an inspiration and has led to the mostly seamless evolution of our favorite game.

But there are a few problems with the Holmgren tree as it came down through Philly. Somehow Andy Reid did not inherit the running game gene. Holmgren’s Super Bowl experiences were led by brilliant QB’s–on the backs of Dorsey Levens, Ahman Green and Sean Alexander. Reid was apparently frightened by a power runner at a young age. He then ended up with a generational talent in Brian Westbrook and proceeded to pretend that No. 26 could substitute for John Riggins.

Result, Philly has never gotten over the hump and McNabb and Westbrook will be lucky to walk well at 50.

The worst manifestation of this aberrant gene is Mike Martz, who clearly doesn’t know a running back when he sees one (Matt Forte anyone?) and probably thought that Marshall Faulk was just a short, fast slot receiver.

Running backs aren’t the only disappearing positions in this mutation: offensive lines are endangered species in Philadelphia and Chicago and are only now re-appearing after Martz nearly made them extinct in St. Louis and Detroit.

You can see why I worry about Pat. Which genes did he get? The Holmgren power-run-with-talented-passer Championship combo? Or the quarterback-running-for-his-life Reid family branch? Shurmur has been given players to fit the former. But, based on the fact that there have been only 60-odd running plays in three weeks, I worry. And I’ll bet it’s scaring Mrs. McCoy, too. Careful, Shurmur. Remember what Brenda Warner did when Martz darn near got her husband killed.

Pat worked with Heckert and Reid in Philly. Plus Holmgren Heckert and Shurmur all have the same agent. This is starting to get a little creepy. And if anyone thinks the fact that Holmgren worked with Fritz Shurmur during the Super Bowl days in Green Bay is incidental to the hiring of the former Packer D-coordinator’s nephew–I have some swamp land in Florida we should discuss.

And this is why we still need the Rooney rule.