Note: The quotes in this article are fictional.
San Francisco is one of five teams still winless this year, but in their defense, the 49ers have set themselves apart from the other four, in that no one expected them to be in this situation. Picked by many to win the NFC West, the Niners are in dead last, and are struggling to find answers on offense and defense. Just don’t ask Mike Singletary about it, lest you be removed from your job.
“As you know,” said Singletary, “’failure to communicate’ was bogging down our offense. No one can accuse me of not doing anything about it, nor can they accuse me of ‘failure to ex-communicate,’ because I’ve fired offensive coordinator Jimmy Raye, who failed in both aspects of his job title, ‘offense’ and ‘coordinating.’"
"But we throw blame around better than we do the ball. Our downfield passing attack has been virtually non-existent, as evidenced by running back Frank Gore’s 22 receptions, which places him in a tie for third in the entire league. Vernon Davis can’t get open, and Michael Crabtree is playing like a player whose agent was a bail bondsman. It’s time for some changes. It’s like getting play calls to the huddle—if we don’t do something ‘in a hurry,’ we’re doomed.”
After an emotional win in the Superdome, the Falcons must avoid overconfidence and concentrate fully on the 49ers, who are still a dangerous team, especially when backed into a “Coach’s Corner" by an inquisitive television show host.
“We must avoid a letdown,” Matt Ryan said. “But we can’t avoid ‘The Letdown,’ because ‘The Letdown’ is the 49ers, and they’re next on our schedule."
We know the 49ers have the talent to win. They’ll find the coaching soon enough.
Falcons win 23-20.