Imagine that you ran a company and under your stewardship, it suffered the worst year out of any comparable company in its field. Chances are, your business would be screwed, right?
Well, it doesn't work that way in the NFL. If you finish with the worst record, you're rewarded with the No. 1 overall pick in the following year's draft, enabling you to choose the best player from college to help your team start winning games.
This creates a strange phenomenon, whereby fans start rooting for their favorite team to lose—or, at least, hope for them to not win enough in order to secure a top pick and the chance to select an outstanding young player.
That brings us to this Sunday's otherwise nondescript slop-fest between the 1-9 Jaguars and 2-8 Texans.
Now, you might be thinking: Those fans are surely starved for victory and want to end the season on a high note, right?!
Wrong. So ridiculously wrong.
If I were a fan of the Jags or Texans, I would be praying for my team to lose. Literally, I would get down on my hands and knees and pray for a loss.
Watch the above video. That man is Jadeveon Clowney, and he is not someone you want to piss off. That poor running back for Michigan literally had no chance, and he's probably still seeing stars.
So, yeah, Jags and Texans fans, I know the temptation is to root for your team. You're tired of losing. You want a winner, damn it!
Well, that winner isn't coming this year, so you might as well start planning for the future. Understand that, at this point, a loss is just as good as a win.
You are officially Clowning for Clowney. And you should absolutely love it.