The (Thursday) Morning Tailgate

Tiger Woods, step on up to our Morning Tailgate awards table. You win the prestigious First Brat, after winning your Wednesday of golf competition.

Now, be careful on the step; it’s tricky. Don’t want you to re-injure that knee. There ya go. Easy does it, now. Easy does it. Easy…

Good. Now take this sausage and place it in that bun over there. Yea. Pour on some ketchup and mustard if you’d like. Good.

Now turn around and face away from the crowd. Cool. Keep facing that way. Keep …

While you’re turned around, your wife Elin is going to take off her clothes and have fun. Super.

February 26

1973 - Marshall Faulk is born.  After seeing him flawlessly catch a pacifier thrown his way, nurses immediately label him a “complete” baby.

1981 - 406 penalty minutes are assessed in a single NHL game between Minnesota and Boston.  Although not confirmed, it is believed that several players were required to sit in the penalty box up to three hours after the game had ended.

1987 - Michael Jordan’s scores 58 points against the New Jersey Nets becomes (and is) a Chicago Bull record.  Maybe it’s recent single-game scoring feats of Kobe Bryant, but we find it hard to believe that 58 was Jordan’s highest game point total in his career.

2019 - Chris Berman wishes everyone a "Happy Feb 26."

Sometimes those perks come in the form of money, fame and women.  Sometimes, as in the case of Bengals linebacker Dhani Jones, the perks come in the form of getting your own Travel channel show where you go around the world and participate in foreign sports like Muay Thai boxing, Rugby and Hurling.

And he does all this while maintaining ownership of a company that sells high-end bow ties.   Some guys create their own perks, we suppose.

You should celebrate Koko B. Ware because the WWE says so.

Trivia question for you bird-lovers. What was the name of Koko’s parrot? First one to answer correctly wins nothing.

JSF Cyber Garage Sale - because the sports world needs ceramic monkey statues with college affiliation.