Matching Alex Rodriguez and MLB's 10 Highest Paid with Top 10 Sports Cars

When you make serious sports scratch, you need a serious street machine.  We're counting down Major League Baseball's 10 highest paid players (according to USA Today) and matching them with the 10 most expensive production cars on the market (according to thesupercars.org) today. 

We're breaking player salary ties by comparing their three-year averages.  We're breaking automobile price tag ties by imagining which one Brooklyn Decker might prefer.  Please keep your hands and feet inside the vehicles at all times.  Buckle your seatbelt and click the arrow to begin the ride.      

You can enjoy more of award-winning writer R. Scott Murphy’s baseball stories in his latest book, "Ducks on the Pond."  Murphy's official home on the web is www.officialmidnitewriter.com.  Follow Murphy @MentalKickball on Twitter for daily Home Run Alphabet entries.

10. Roy Halladay, Philadelphia Phillies

Doc is earning a cool $20 million for 2011 from the Phillies.  That may be a bargain for the City of Brotherly Love.  Halladay is the ace of the team with the NL's best record.  The two-time Cy Young Award winner leads the NL in complete games (seven) and innings pitched (189.2).  He's fourth in strikeouts (182) and second in wins (15).  He's fifth in NL ERA (2.56). 

Bottom line, let Halladay buy any car he wants in this countdown, or all of them. 

10. Saleen S7 Twin Turbo

The Saleen S7 Twin Turbo is an American production certified supercar that runs $555,000.  It's ranked as the fourth-fastest car in the world with a top speed of 248 miles per hour.  It goes from 0-60 in just 3.2 seconds. 

Roy Halladay could buy 36 Saleens with his 2011 salary and still have smackeroos left over to pimp some of his rides. 

9. Ryan Howard, Philadelphia Phillies

Like Roy Halladay, Howard is pocketing $20 million from the Phils for the 2011 campaign.  He's ninth in NL homers (26), third in RBI (96) and ninth in walks (61).  His .251 batting average and 144 strikeouts, however, need improvement if Philadelphia is to make a deep run in the postseason. 

Let The Big Piece buy multiple cars in the countdown, but ask him for a ride before he drives away. 

9. Ascari A10

The Ascari A10 will run Ryan Howard $650,000 but he could put 30 of them in his expanded driveway using his 2011 salary.  The A10 reached a tested speed of 215 miles per hour and went from 0-60 in 2.8 seconds. 

Howard better hurry, however, as the British car company plans to assemble just 50 of these beauties in their factory in Banbury, England.  

8. Miguel Cabrera, Detroit Tigers

Motown's main man is also at the $20 million mark for 2011.  Is he worth it?  His .319 batting average, 247 total bases, 23 home runs, 83 RBI, 32 doubles, 86 walks and 214 total bases all lead Los Tigres.  Couple that with the potential Cy Young campaign of Justin Verlander, and the Tigers may be making some serious playoff noise. 

Let Miguel make more noise in any of the vehicles he wants in our countdown.

8. SSC Ultimate Aero

The SSC Ultimate Aero costs $654,400.  It's the third-fastest street-legal car in the world with a top speed of 257 mph.  It goes from 0-60 in 2.7 seconds.  It is estimated that only 25 of this exact model will ever be produced. 

Miguel Cabrera can be bullish at any auto dealer with his 2011 cha-ching.

7. Todd Helton, Colorado Rockies

Todd "Highway to Helton" is on the dotted line for $20.275 million for 2011.  Talk about your Rocky Mountain high! 

How's he doing?  Helton is hitting .310 with 14 homers, 67 RBI and 188 total bases.  Those are fairly decent digits, but you can bet that Troy Tulowitzki sees those stats and has his agent on speed dial.  Todd is free to buy supercars, but don't buy too many of them, Todd.   

7. Pagani Zonda C12 F

Cost of the Pagani Zonda C12 F?  It costs $667,321.  That means Todd Helton can get 30 of them with this year's dinero. 

Produced by a small company in Italy, the Pagani Zonda C12 F boasts a top speed of 215 mph.  It can reach 0-60 in 3.5 seconds. 

6. Johan Santana, New York Mets

You don't have to look very closely at the picture to realize this is the smile of a lefty hurler earning $21,644,707 this season.  The two-time Cy Young Award winner has 133 career wins but injuries have grabbed his headlines in recent years.  Too bad for the Mets.  

Santana better hold onto his money and not buy a lot of the sports cars in our countdown.  It's unlikely the 32-year-old will command top-shelf cash in coming seasons.  Save your money, Johan—that "rest of your life" stuff can be a real bit**.   

6. Ferrari Enzo

You need at least $670,000 to incorporate a Ferrari Enzo into your swag.  It is called "the most popular supercar ever built" by thesupercars.org.  The Enzo has a top speed of 217 mph and reaches 60 mph in 3.4 seconds.

Remember, it is not red—it is "Ferrari red." 

5. Joe Mauer, Minnesota Twins

How do you make Metropolitan backstop wunderkind Joe Mauer catch a down season?  Give him an eight-year contract extension worth $184 million. 

Super Joe gets $23 million for 2011.  Then the mighty Mauer gets the injury bug.  This means the Twins get just one dinger and 25 RBI so far.  Say his name and hear fantasy players groan from coast to coast.  A healthy Mauer, however, should spell a return for the 28-year-old to his .324 career batting average form next season. 

It's probably still OK for the three-time batting champion to drop some dollars on sports cars.   

5. McLaren F1

Got $970,000?  Get a McLaren F1. 

Joe Mauer could get 23 of them with his 2011 salary.  Even though it was built 15 years ago, it has a top speed of 240 mph and hits 60 mph in 3.2 seconds.  That's the kind of longevity all of the MLB teams are looking for when they pony up the serious dough!

4. Mark Teixeira, New York Yankees

Big Tex is banking (we prefer credit unions in these crazy economic times) $23.125 million for the Bronx Bombers in 2011.  Is he Robin to Curtis Granderson's Batman act?  That scenario didn't go so well for Chad Ochocinco and T.O. last year, so we'll leave it alone. 

Check out the AL stat leaders and see Tex tied for second with 35 seat souvenirs.  He's third in RBI with 96.  He's also in the top 10 in total bases and bases on balls.  The .246 average needs work, so MT shouldn't spend all $23 million and change on sports cars. 

4. Koenigsegg Agera R

It takes $1.6 million to drive into the ballpark with a Koenigsegg Agera R.  If you're saying "ouch," you probably shouldn't consider one. 

The Agera R is the picture you see when you look up "burn rubber" in the dictionary.  It goes from 0-60 in 2.8 seconds and reaches a maximum speed of 260 mph.  What does all of this mean in Big Tex World?  It means Teixeira could buy 14 of them and still afford those New York concession stand prices. 

3. CC Sabathia, New York Yankees

CC Rider can put $24,285,714 worth of gas into his rides this season.  He's also putting a lot of gas into the Yankees' "Chase For 28." 

Big Chuck is 17-7 with a 2.99 ERA.  He's eaten up 205 innings and struck out 191 batters.  His stretch run will provide the final answer to the question, "Is he worth all of that money?"  For now, he is free to buy whichever supercars he wants. 

3. Lamborghini Reventon

Priced the same as the Koenigsegg Agera R ($1.6 million) but an eyelash cooler on the Brooklyn Decker Index, the Lambo Reventon is quite possibly sex on wheels.  Admit it, you're drooling. 

The most powerful and the most expensive Lamborghini ever built, it takes 3.3 seconds to reach 60 mph.  It has a top speed of 211 mph.  Its rarity (limited to 20) and slick design are the reasons why it is so expensive.  How many can CC Driver buy this season?  Fifteen. 

2. Vernon Wells, California Angels

That's right, the current .209 hitter is the second-highest paid player in baseball this year at $26,187,500.  Highway robbery?  Possibly.  The California police are on the case. 

He has 17 homers.  That means the Angels are paying him an average of $1.5 million for each launch.  It doesn't help to point out his OBP is .242 to date.  We hear you, Toronto.  Dude used to be a beast. 

Or did he?  In a major league career that began in 1999, Wells has just three seasons of 30-plus homers and three seasons of 100-plus RBI.  Either Wells has the best agent in baseball, or the Angels need a new calculator. 

Final note, in baseballreference.com's Fan EloRater, Wells ranks after Wally Pipp and Brady Anderson.  What would fans have screamed if either one of them got $26 million?  Vernon, stay away from anything with speed and four wheels.  Heck, make that two wheels as well. 

2. Pagani Zonda Clinque Roadster

$1.85 million.  We thought we'd save the suspense on this one.  We swear it resembles some of the cooler cars in our collection.  Of course, they are mostly Hot Wheels cruising around our Dilbert-style cubicles.  Isn't eBay wonderful?  We digress. 

Anyway, this bad boy can go from 0-60 in 3.4 seconds with a top speed of 217 mph.  Let us know if Vernon Wells gets anywhere near it. 

1. Alex Rodriguez, New York Yankees

Despite injury challenges this season, A-Rod's swing is still a finely tuned engine, a supercar engine.  Sure, $32 million is mad cash for doing anything, but 626 lifetime big-lifters, a lifetime .302 batting average and 1,883 lifetime RBI come together to create a resume good enough to make Cammy Diaz (and many others) wiggle. 

Where does A-Rod rank on the Fan EloRater?  He's currently ranked No. 37 all-time.  As Adam Sandler says, "That's not too shabby."  Meanwhile, Vernon Wells is in Wally Pipp World, where all they talk about is The Iron Horse.   

1. Bugatti Veyron Super Sports

The Bugatti Veyron Super Sports is the most expensive street-legal car available on the market today.  It is also the fastest accelerating car reaching 0-60 in 2.5 seconds.  It earns the triple crown by being the fastest street-legal car reaching a top speed of 267 mph.

We have to wonder, would it cause massive human brain overload to see Brooklyn Decker driving one?

You can enjoy more of award-winning writer R. Scott Murphy’s baseball stories in his latest book, "Ducks on the Pond."  Murphy's official home on the web is www.officialmidnitewriter.com.  Follow Murphy @MentalKickball on Twitter for daily Home Run Alphabet entries.