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50 Worst Pro Sports Bodies in History

Andrew KulhaJun 4, 2018

Guys, loosen up your belts; ladies, put away the scales! It’s time to talk about the worst bodies in sports!

Professional athletes are the best at what they do, and the strain and rigor that they put their bodies through is tremendous.

It’s easy for us to scoff at them from our couches as we are pounding down a bag of potato chips, but the fact of the matter is that most of these athletes are in incredible shape.

That being said, some may have taken one too many trips to the buffet at the team hotel, or packed a few too many Twinkies for a road trip.

When you can’t fit on the back of your athletic card, you know it might be time to cut down on the Cheetos.

When home plate looks more like a Thanksgiving platter than a run scored, you might just be an out-of-shape athlete.

Here are the 50 worst professional sports bodies in history:

Warm Up

1 of 51

Here's a little something to whet your appetite for this list.

50. Tony Stewart

2 of 51

Some people don't think that you have to be in shape to drive a car around a track a whole bunch of times, but ask anyone who has ever done it, and they'd beg to differ.

I guarantee you they've got a hose attached to Stewart just to suction out his sweat!

49. Ronaldo

3 of 51

If you search for Ronaldo online, you will think I'm crazy.

Search for fat Ronaldo...

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48. George Foreman

4 of 51

To be fair, George looks pretty jacked here.

But, I have a grill with his name on it, so he's on the list.

47. Zach Randolph

5 of 51

Randolph has picked up the slack as of late, but back in the day, he was what we would term as a butterball.

46. JaMarcus Russell

6 of 51

I considered putting Russell No. 1 because of the absolute failure he became, but this list doesn't take purple drank into consideration.

45. Daunte Culpepper

7 of 51

Daunte's "roll celebration" really took on a whole new meaning towards the end of his career...

44. Robert Gallery

8 of 51

Now, Gallery is paid to be a big man, so I can't really fault him for any of this.

That being said, he is a big boy!

He also needs a haircut.

43. Antoine Walker

9 of 51

What made Antoine Walker look even worse was the fact that he always looked like he was about to cry.

42. Anthony Johnson

10 of 51

I always used to think that Johnson was a local YMCA player who won a contest or something...

41. Baron Davis

11 of 51

The only thing fatter than Baron Davis is Baron Davis' beard.

40. Charles Barkley

12 of 51

His nickname was "The Round Mound of Rebound."

Need I say more?

39. Shaq

13 of 51

Back in the day, the Diesel used to be a tank. He got fat, though.

38. Shawn Kemp

14 of 51

If you look closely, I think you can see a milk mustache.

37. Glen Davis

15 of 51

If you stare long enough, you'll see a cheeseburger...

36. Jared Lorenzen

16 of 51

Peyton Manning!? Gosh, that time off really went to your thighs...

In all seriousness, this is an NFL quarterback.

35. Mo Vaughn

17 of 51

Where's Curly and Dopey?

Or, whatever the Three Stooges' names were...

34. Tony Gwynn

18 of 51

I see London, I see France!

I see Tony Gwynn's belly.

33. Cecil Fielder

19 of 51

This is the only guy on the list to have a son bigger than him.

Quite an honor for the proud papa.

32. Sid Fernandez

20 of 51

This is called the bellyball.

31. Angel Cabrera

21 of 51

I'm surprised he can get the club around!

30. Jerome Bettis

22 of 51

You don't get nicknamed "The Bus" because you are a little petite man...

29. Nate Newton

23 of 51

Newton always enjoyed those tight jerseys.

Really accentuates the curves...

28. Bartolo Colon

24 of 51

Big fat Bartolo Colon!

That's what I call him.

The whole phrase is necessary.

27. Michael Sweetney

25 of 51

Generally speaking, when you look like this as an NBA player, your role is to take up space.

And then you end up on my list.

Two roles to fill, and he did them well!

26. B.J. Raji

26 of 51

The way this man can move his hips is absolutely terrifying.

25. Dmitri Young

27 of 51

No, this is not the drummer from The Roots.

24. Bobby Jenks

28 of 51

Please post your reaction to this picture below in the comments.

Mine: AHHH!

23. Antonio Alfonseca

29 of 51

Fat Antonio Alfonseca!

That's all I got...

22. Pablo Sandoval

30 of 51

If people look at you and think "panda..."

You are either endangered or fat.

Two options, pretty simple.

21. Robert Traylor

31 of 51

Rest In Peace, big fella...

20. Rich Garces

32 of 51

Caption contest on this photo!

Mine: Mmmmmm...Ho-Ho's!

19. Prince Fielder

33 of 51

This is what happens when you don't give Prince a snack before the game!

18. David Wells

34 of 51

One of the more famous stomachs in baseball right here!

17. Gilbert Brown

35 of 51

Back in the day, Gilbert was known as the Grave Digger.

If he fell on you, chances are you would die...

16. Shaun Rogers

36 of 51

Still one of my favorite moments ever.

15. Eddy Curry

37 of 51

Ladies and gentlemen, I give you:

The richest out-of-shape athlete in sports.

14. Babe Ruth

38 of 51

There is no denying that "The Babe" was horribly out of shape...

13. Oliver Miller

39 of 51

When your nickname is "The Big O," this list is where you gotta go!

12. Aaron Gibson

40 of 51

I think Mr. Gibson may have eaten his defender...

11. Butterbean

41 of 51

Yes, Butterbean is a real athlete!

I dare you to dispute it, he's been known to knock out a few fools in his day!

10. Sam Adams

42 of 51

This is one of my favorite big guys, but only because he reminds me of the beer.

9. John Daly

43 of 51

Daly is known for being fat and for partying.

Basically, he is living the American dream.

8. Roy Nelson

44 of 51

This is athletics at its best.

Notice the man over his shoulder...

7. Emanuel Yarbrough

45 of 51

Yarbrough would be No. 1, but his job requires him to be this big.

Nonetheless, he is an athlete, so I figured a top 10 spot would make him happy.

6. C.C. Sabathia

46 of 51

Sabathia's one big boy!

I could make a fat joke, but it's getting redundant.

5. William Perry

47 of 51

He was nicknamed "The Fridge" because he was as big as one, and he could eat everything in it!

4. Vince Wilfork

48 of 51

I believe he is explaining how to get to the nearest Burger King.

3. Tony Siragusa

49 of 51

The Goose is arguably one of the biggest men ever to grace an NFL football field.

He also gives sideline reports between McNuggets.

2. Terrence Cody

50 of 51

If you look closely, you can see a small moon gravitating around him in the picture.

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