Albert Haynesworth: The Quintessential Waste of Space

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Albert Haynesworth: The Quintessential Waste of Space
Larry French/Getty Images

Scalpel? Check.

Drill? Check.

Paralyzing agent? Check.

Anesthesia? No? Well, I don't think he deserves it.

Let the "Tearing a New One," operation for Albert Haynesworth begin.

Albert Haynesworth has never done anything to make this writer like him, and has made multiple efforts to make this writer despise him.

Well, he's achieving his objective so far.

Albert Haynesworth has just announced that he will not attend mandatory mini-camp for the Redskins, but intends to sit out, and actually has the gall to demand a trade.

This is just the latest of Haynesworth's disgusting behavior.

The most egregious example, which actually makes me LOATH the man, is what he did to Dallas Cowboys center, Andre Gurode.

I think it is best if you just see it for yourself

He was suspended for five games because of that vicious assault, one of the longest suspensions ever given to a player.

Yet, despite that, I have to admit that when Haynesworth sets his mind on football, he is devastating. He's so huge yet has that quickness a defensive tackle needs to create enormous amounts of pressure.

However, he felt that his abilities warranted more than what the Titans were paying him. When he hit free agency, Dan Snyder, the owner of the Washington Redskins, wanted to get him.

Snyder is under the naive impression that if you collect all of the big names, you will be successful.

Albert Haynesworth signed a contract worth up to $115 million, with $41 million guaranteed over the first three years. After just one year, Haynesworth is starting to whine again.

The Redskins did misuse him, and he didn't have near the statistical season last year that he is capable of. He doesn't like playing nose tackle in a 3-4 defense when he is used to being a 4-3 defensive tackle.

He only had 38 total tackles this past season as compared to his 51 in 2008, four sacks to his eight and a half in 2008, and no forced fumbles to his three in 2008.

Yet, let's get serious here. Albert Haynesworth has to have a brain or at least his agent has one. Haynesworth knew that he was signing with a team that had no direction on offense, a horrible general manager, and an owner who just doesn't fit on an NFL field.

He made his bed, ate food in it, and is crying about how the crumbs on the sheets are itchy.

He's even alienated his own teammates. One said on Chris Russell's sport show on 106.7 The Fan D.C. "[Haynesworth] loves money and not football.  He is a great actor.  Actors get paid a lot of money."

He played like a lunatic to get this big contract with the Titans, and now he's gotten it, he doesn't want to work for it.

Therefore, like the child he really is, is demanding a trade out of D.C.

If he holds out, he can be fined $10,000 a day, and it can increase to $16,000 a day, but when he already has multiple millions in the bank, this is chump change.

Overall, and this is to Albert Haynesworth himself, SUCK IT UP!

You are not God, though they have made you richer than him. You are not bigger than your team, you are not bigger than the NFL, so grow up, wipe the snot off your nose, get rid of your XXXXXXXXXX-large diaper, and act like a real man.

Why the NFL gets buffoons like you is beyond me.

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