Tim Tebow, the king of interceptions, the colossus of media coverage, the off-Manhattan miracle, the baller of backups had himself a birthday and the world subsequently freaked out.
I wonder what you all did with your Tim Tebow day, an apparent holiday that demands GQ Magazine spreads, ESPN insanity and every last person on earth lending an opinion to the most popular backup player in the history of sports and benches.
The morning started with nausea, without the added benefit of a previous night of drinking. No, this is what many of us woke to when we flipped on SportsCenter, via Bleacher Report's Twitter feed.
ESPN's Tebow coverage is out of control. SportsCenter just threw a birthday party for Tim Tebow.twitpic.com/ajednh— Bleacher Report (@BleacherReport) August 14, 2012
That would be Marcellus Wiley, Sara Walsh and Herm Edwards holding the saddest sight since my high school yearbook pictures.
Walsh brings us in with knowledge that August 14th is Tebow's 25th birthday; video can be seen over at SportsGrid.
And oh, BTDubbs, it's Magic Johnson's birthday too. You may know him from such hits as saving the freaking NBA in the 80s.
I now fully expect a rousing fiesta when Chad Henne or Dan Orlovsky's birthday comes around. Hell, when is Eddy Curry's, because we are going Metta World Peace crazy for bench players.
GQ Magazine got into the Tim Tebow parade recently with the cover of the latest issue being split between Rookie of the Year Cam Newton and Man of the Century Tim Tebow.
The Jets are now 2-for-2 in the last two seasons as Mark Sanchez rocked the cover prior to the start of last year's regular season.
Newton is one of the best young quarterbacks in the game, passing for over 4,000 yards last year with 21 touchdowns. Pretty amazing if it weren't for...OMG Tebow!
Sigh, I now truly miss the Olympics and coverage of sports that weren't all about Tebow and only slightly about those other guys in pads.
For those that label me a hater, bring it. This isn't about hating Tebow, merely the media that force feeds us his image like we were geese and they were making clean-cut Foie gras.
In fact, shut it.
We know you love Tim Tebow, you know you love Tim Tebow and your Tebow Snuggie you sleep under knows you love Tim Tebow.
Meanwhile, the defending champion New York Giants are suffering in camp with stiff beds. Where is their 24 hours of news coverage, because it sounds like a modern-day atrocity over there?
This brings us to the main point of the national holiday known as Tim Tebow day, where you huddle around with your closest friends and shake your heads until numbness sets in.
It makes understanding the media attention a little more tolerable.
Follow me on Twitter for more sips of Haterade.