I'm about to delve into the situation that is Terrelle Pryor. I'm about to beat the horse to post-mortem.
Take a minute to relax, and do a few deep-breathing exercises. Don't jump to conclusions either. Give this a chance and once all is said and done, have at me. Squeeze the living daylights out of your stress ball if you need to.
The testosterone-filled show 1000 Ways To Die was only a precedent of the sports' spin-off, 1000 Ways To Ridicule Terrelle Pryor. We've made this a reality, along with 1000 Ways To Reiterate Carson Palmer Rejecting The Bengals.
We get it, so let's move on with the angst and shine a new light.
The Supplemental Draft is proving to be Pryor's only outlet. He claims he wishes to one day earn his degree, leading us to believe he is truly remorseful that his time in Columbus was cut short.
With his Buckeye career tarnished beyond repair, Pryor's path to the NFL is the epitome of TBD. Riddled with what-ifs and doubts, the tape on Pryor doesn't have many NFL scouts losing sleep.
Luckily for Pryor, the FFCA exists, and Jon Gruden cares.
AKA Chucky, Gruden is the judge, jury, and executioner when a player stands before the FFCA. Gruden's a former quarterback, a Super Bowl-winning coach, and in this case, a film fanatic.
For his one-hour ESPN session with Pryor, it took Gruden almost two weeks to dissect Pryor's game, mannerisms, and mentality. I, for one, was apprehensive of this event.
I imagined that all we'd get from this was Pryor trying to answer numerous concerns about his throwing ability, thus resulting in a few memorable botched attempts at saving face. You know, something like the "Everybody kills" spiel, with a defensive twist.
But like past interviews with signal-callers, Gruden did not completely turn the meeting into a roast.
Even with the...special circumstances surrounding Pryor, the discussion was not involving much money Pryor racked up with his John Hancock. There was no question of which "rented" car Pryor liked the most, or why he ran a red light with all of TMZ filming his departure from the Woody Hayes Athletic Center.
Specifics weren't needed. Those can be found in the other million articles about Pryor. When asked about the actions causing the resignation of Jim Tressel, one word was enough for Pryor.
He was disgusted with his fallout, but more importantly the Vest's. Because of this whole epidemic, the Buckeyes are missing out on one of the most promising recruiting classes in recent history, particularly along the defensive line.
Even Pryor, who a few years ago announced his choice of school to be "The University of Ohio State,” knew exactly the affect this would have down the line. Now on national television again, he didn't hesitate to call the school's name properly, with extra emphasis on The.
If there is a time and place to make amends, it's when facing the FFCA. Gruden is a wizard at analyzing players. It's no surprise that the players he has grilled have called his sessions beneficial.
Sure, Pryor still showed his ugly side. Maybe it's because I was looking a bit too hard for questionable statements, but, nonetheless, they were there.
I doubt Pryor helps people out everyday by giving them the money he has or taking them to get food, but then again, I wasn't in the 614 watching his every move. I have a life of my own, too.
The most discouraging part of the interview was Pryor's admission to not knowing the words to "Across the Field" or "Carmen Ohio.” As a Buckeye fan, I cringed. How could the centerpiece of a team, the team, not show enough faith to remember a few stanzas? And he admitted it with such ease.
If I like a song, I remember it instantly. I also remember the lines of a Justin Bieber song I hear for ten seconds, and I loathe the boy. I probably shouldn't have admitted that to the world, but I'm trying to make a point.
Despite this atrocity, I'm not here to talk about the past. Learn to forgive and forget. No matter the circumstances. Everyone deserves a second chance. Yeah, all that jazz.
Gruden was talking to Pryor, but I think he wanted to talk to Dane Sanzenbacher as well. "Reliable" said Gruden as he blushed. Chucky must have pronounced his name ten different ways, ten different times.
I sense a bromance stirring.
However, Gruden really did a favor to Pryor. He changed a bit of my perception, and probably many people's. Gruden surely thinks so. He shows the good along with the bad.
Pryor's passion was a big plus for Gruden. He gave us that famous Chucky smirk when Pryor told him, "I hate defenses.” Sounds like exactly the thing you want your quarterback to say.
A position change in the NFL was reiterated by Gruden. Admittedly, Pryor didn't totally dismiss this idea, although he made it clear that's his path.
That's his calling card.
What does Pryor know about his unusual road to pro ball?
"It's a second draft."
Maybe that's a good thing. He shouldn't look at it like anything else, except a second chance. To have landed in his current position, I'd say he got the picture.
He will be remembered for selling his Gold Pants, his tattoo trades, and his reckless driving. Most people will forget his 31-4 record, and his 2-0 record as the starting quarterback in bowl games. (For those who were about to question my knowledge, he lined up as a receiver to start out the 2009 Fiesta Bowl. Awkward...) His MVP performances in those games, playing against teams "too fast for the B1G Ten, will go by the way side.
If history has proven anything, it's to expect the unexpected. Pryor indeed has more than his fair share of rusty spots in his game. But who's to say he couldn't become the next Bernie Kosar or Steve Young? That would definitely continue the Supplemental pipeline.
The team that selects Pryor will have a special weapon. He's no secret weapon, because everyone knows what he can do.
Like one unknown but wise person tweeted, "If Rex Grossman can be an NFL quarterback, Pryor definitely can."
In a time where the Wildcat offense is rejuvenated, you don't think some team could use him like Antwan Randle El or Josh Cribbs?
Give credit where credit is due. Jon Gruden did his best Dr. Drew burlesque by advertising Pryor. Dual-threat, 4.3 speed, and a proven winner.
Pryor will be useful in the NFL, no doubt. The question is to what extent.