I hear the Super Bowl is something of a crowd puller.
A national event over in the US where the best athletes in American football combine with the best coaches and tactical minds to create a game that can not be bettered.
Or so I am told.
But as a gridiron virgin (if I dare use such a phrase), I don't really expect to "get it" in the way the aficionados do.
I know that there are two teams, like most sports, which is a start I suppose.
But then it goes a bit weird because you have offence and defence (spelt correctly for you there my lovely American cousins).
So if these are the best athletes the US has to offer, how come they can only do half the job?
But then you also have special teams, and a little bloke who only kicks off and goes for goals. That seems like a cool job to be honest.
Now, as far as I can tell, these teams periodically swap roles and give the other team a go at the job they were previously doing.
But that's not all, the main aim is to get the ball into the oppositions' end zone, and the offence is allowed a series of downs to get the ball a minimum of 10 yards. If they get that 10 yards, they get four more chances, and so on and so forth.
Again, if these wonderful, super athletes struggle to get a ball 10 yards (it's not that far really, now is it?), I am wondering if this Super Bowl will keep me riveted.
Oh, and whilst I am on the idea of being kept riveted, how long will this thing last? I read somewhere it can take a few hours to complete a game with four quarters, a halftime and about five hundred ad breaks!
But I digress.
I am told that I might see a Hail Mary and some blitzes and that there used to be a player called the Fridge.
Oh, and what the heck is XLV, it sounds like a new Japanese car. Why not simply say Super Bowl 45?
The two teams are the Packers and the Steelers, which I assume represent factories or work places of some form, perhaps meat packers and steel fixers?
But before I make myself look foolish, I thought I would get my prediction in.
I predict that I will only understand 10 percent of what I see, and I won't make it to halftime before switching over to an episode of House.
Oh, and the score will be Packers 14, Steelers 24.
I hope that helps.