New York City's Losing Ways

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New York City's Losing Ways

IconThis used to be the city that never sleeps. There was always something going on, something exciting to keep one from hitting the sack too early. Many times that was a sporting event. 

Lately, the people of the New York metro area have had few sporting moments to lose sleep over.

 
Baseball

As far as I'm concerned, the Mets and the Yankees are overpaid chokers. 

The Yankees are a step behind Boston these days, which means they are wild-card timber at best.  They just signed LaTroy Hawkins to pitch in their bullpen. If they thought Joba's bug-infested performance was bad, wait until this guy pitches!

Enjoy your $11 beers in your $150 seats while watching this bunch fight for a playoff spot...

The Mets are a day late and a dollar short in the National League.  They gave away Lastings Milledge for two role players, and have yet to find an established front-line starter to anchor their pitching staff.  Their only hope is to land Johan Santana—but that will apparently cost them every player under 25 on their 40-man roster.

After the superior el foldo they just pulled off, you would think they'd be more active...

Both ball clubs open their new stadiums in 2009, so the interest in baseball will still be fairly strong around here. I'm going to sell a kidney so I can afford to get a Saturday plan at CitiField.

 
IconBasketball

Yes, New York has an NBA team. In fact we have two, if you count the Nets. 

The Knicks are a mess. Isiah Thomas has run the team into the ground, got himself and his bosses sued for sexual harassment, and apparently has job security for the foreseeable future. 

Don't worry though: the Garden took care of the problem by installing a policy to eject anyone who says the words "fire" and "Isiah" in the same paragraph.

The Nets still play in the Meadowlands. They may as well be in Siberia. They need to get to Brooklyn before Jason Kidd, Richard Jefferson, and Vince Carter hit middle age. That doesn't look good right now and neither do the Nets.

St. John's used to be one of the nation's top college basketball programs. That was until Mike Jarvis got his hands on it.  His arrogance and nonchalance forced recruit after recruit to flee New York for other programs.

The fallout has been devastating. St. John's is no longer a basketball power—not even in New York!

 
http://i91.photobucket.com/albums/k299/bigmikesc/jw.jpgFootball

The Jets? They still play? Oh yeah, they're that team we have to watch while we wait for the Giants or another game to come on. 

Eric Mangini and Mike Tannenbaums' collective genius has led to only three victories thus far this year—and two of those came at the expense of Miami.  This bunch is downright awful...

The Giants may be 9-5, but they're a soft 9-5.  Eli Manning can't manage the winds at the Meadowlands, his receivers can't catch the ball when he does, and the defense takes off entire quarters at a time. 

That said, they may still make the playoffs still. But that says more about how bad the NFC is than it does about how good the Giants are...

Oh, I forgot: the New Meadowlands complex also opens in 2009. Get your wallets out for that bad boy.

 
Icon Sports MediaHockey

The "who cares?" section of the article.

The Rangers won the cup in 1994 after 54 years of futility. That means they're good for 40 more years. Halley's Comet will pass by twice before they see that thing again...

The Islanders should just fold because nobody cares anymore.  The Devils play in Newark now. Enough said.

That's nine teams—count 'em—NINE TEAMS with tales of woe.

This is New York. At least one of these teams should be able to thrill us in 2008.

Newsflash—its not happenin...

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