Note: The quotes in this article are fictional.
Washington @ Philadelphia (-7)
It's Washington's Donovan McNabb versus Philadelphia's Michael Vick in a showdown they're calling "The Battle of Eagle Quarterbacks That Are Better Than Their 2010 Week 1 Starter."
Vick and the Eagles lead the NFC East, with the Giants, Cowboys, and McNabb's Redskins a game behind at 1-2.
"Maybe I was a bit hasty in anointing Kevin Kolb as the heir to the Philly quarterbacking legacy," Andy Reid said. "Frankly, I'm surprised the Reverend Al Sharpton hasn't insisted this whole situation was racially motivated. I can tell you, beyond a shadow of a doubt, I am not a racist. Some of my best quarterbacks are black.
"In hindsight, I can now see that McNabb and Vick are eminently more talented than Kolb and his pedestrian skill. It's like a real-life episode of Pros vs. Joes."
McNabb will undoubtedly face a Philly crowd that will let him have it despite his years of service and accomplishments. The atmosphere will certainly be electric, made more so by the countless Taser-ings of unruly Eagles fanatics.
"If those crazy Eagles fans shower me with boos," McNabb said, "I'll be very surprised, because most Philly fans don't shower. Actually, I'm expecting boos. It will be a nice bookend to my career. I was booed by Philly fans at the 1999 NFL Draft, so boos at Sunday's game will sandwich my career nicely."
Just for kicks, Mike Shanahan names Rex Grossman the starter minutes before game time before coming to his senses and starting McNabb. Andy Reid takes it as a personal jab and exacts his revenge with a trick play in which Vick hits Kolb for a two-yard touchdown pass.
Philadelphia wins, 27-19.