Note: The quotes in this article are fictional.
While the 1-2 Broncos at the 2-1 Titans clash is certainly not the NFL’s game of the week, it will still claim its fair share of viewers, most notably the millions of Tim Tebow followers, fans of the band Blind Faith, and the 11 bastard children of former Broncos and Titans running back Travis Henry.
“That’s a full house,” Jeff Fisher said. “I don’t think LP Field has been that packed since May, when it was full of water.
But just like those children are dependent on a running back for support, so are we. Make no mistake—Chris Johnson’s legs drive this team as much as his dental habits drive the price of gold.
The best thing to happen to Chris was getting rid of LenDale White. Chris always bristled at being "lumped" together with that tubby son of a gun, and he never liked the "Smash and Dash" nickname given them. We all saw last year what Chris could do once he went "fat free."
The Broncos have offset their lack of a running game with the exploits of Kyle Orton, who is second in the NFL with 1,078 yards passing. Orton threw for 476 yards in last week’s 27-13 loss to Indianapolis.
“Tebow is certainly an influential fellow,” Orton said. “I’ll give him that. I’ve even taken to displaying Bible verses on my eye black. Last week, I did a little preaching to the Colts pass defense. ‘Orton 4:76’ says, ‘I just whipped your ass.’”
Johnson posts 185 yards of total offense, and Vince Young tosses two scoring passes. Afterwards, Young signs a young fan’s poster that reads “VinY, VidY, VicY” and apologizes for his inability to read Latin.
Titans win 30-17.