2010 NFL Predictions: Divisional Winners, Super Bowl Champion, and More
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Preseason NFL predictions are about as useful as owning a pair of shoulder pads with spikes or dating a woman who could play middle linebacker for about half the league.
Unless, of course, you are talking about the one and only Will Holt who not only refers to himself in the third person, but is also not bashful when it comes to pointing out that he predicted the Indianapolis Colts and New England Patriots would play in the AFC Championship and the Philadelphia Eagles and New Orleans Saints would battle it out in the NFC Championship last year.
We're talkin' 'bout two outta four people.
Who cares if I had the Colts winning the whole thing last year? I'm impressed that I had the Saints on the doorstep of reaching the Super Bowl after they finished the previous season 8-8.
Okay, okay. I also had the Washington Redskins and the Buffalo Bills making the playoffs last year, too, but I can't be perfect all the time.
Here's the link to last year's thoughts: http://bleacherreport.com/articles/247257-nfl-preseason-predictions-a-total-crap-shoot
My Super Bowl winner is such a lock this year, I asked Bleacher Report if I could charge you mullets to read this wonderful piece.
I got the approval and a charge will appear on your Internet bill. There's no use in closing the page, because you already paid for it. You might as well learn a little something.
Hopefully Eli finds a way to screw it up the celebration
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- New York Giants
- Dallas Cowboys
- Washington Redskins
- Philadelphia Eagles
Everyone is convinced the Dallas Cowboys are hands down the best team in this division.
I'm not buying it.
Look, I do hate Eli Manning, but I can't let my hatred for one player blind me when it comes to the fact that New York has a ton of talent on both sides of the ball.
Manning has arguably the best receiving corps in the league with Steve Smith, Mario Manningham, and Hakeem Nicks highlighting the position.
And even if Manning is having an off day, he can't possibly screw up handing the ball off to Brandon Jacobs, who may actually be one of the more underrated players in the NFL today.
Defensively, the Giants are weak at linebacker, but if history has taught us anything, we know that teams win and lose with a strong defensive line.
With players like Justin Tuck, Mathias Kiwanuka, and Osi Umenyiora up front there is no debating the fact that the defensive line can get pressure without relying on the blitz.
That line will feast on a weak offensive line such as Washington's and take advantage of a young indecisive quarterback in Kevin Kolb.
They may not be as disruptive against the Cowboys and Tony Romo, but with the Giants having won four of the last five in the series, I am not going to bet against them.
You want more info? There's over a dozen slides and I gotta keep it short and sweet.
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- Green Bay Packers
- Minnesota Vikings
- Chicago Bears
- Detroit Lions
This division is going to be a lot more stronger from top to bottom than people think.
I don't think I'm stepping out on a limb to suggest that Green Bay and Minnesota are almost locks to make the playoffs.
But what about Chicago and, wait for it...wait for it...wait for it...Detroit?
Yes, both teams could find themselves in the playoff mix with about two or three games left in the season.
It's not like they have to beat out the '93 Cowboys to make the playoffs. Detroit and Chicago are going to be trying to track down Atlanta, Philadelphia, Washington, and teams of that nature.
With some quality play from Jay Cutler and Matthew Stafford, there is no reason why Chicago or Detroit can't fall into the playoffs.
I'm not saying it is going to happen, but I would not write off either team early in the season.
The biggest downside is that they are going to have to have to face the Pack and Vikings twice.
P.S. The Super Bowl champion is coming from this division.
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- New Orleans
- Atlanta Falcons
- Tampa Bay Buccaneers
- Carolina Panthers
If Drew Brees didn't have a giant mole on his face, I would guess he was pointing back at some hot chick.
Oh, wait, he's a Super Bowl MVP, makes a ton of money, and has achieved celebrity status. Alright, maybe he is.
The best thing about Brees is that I don't think he will let any of that get to his head and it certainly won't affect him on the field this year.
His numbers are not going to decline and he will probably have his thir consecutive 30-plus touchdown and 4,000-plus-yard season again.
The only thing I am not sold on is the Saints defense.
Last year the defense forced 39 turnovers, which helped the Saints pull out several one-possession victories. I'm not so sure the defense can be that good once again to help them win close games.
Relax Saints fans, I'm not saying your team stinks and I really don't feel like hearing you cry, so give it a rest. All I'm trying to say is that it is difficult for a team to rely on turnovers on a consistent basis before it comes back to bite them in the backside.
It's a Mickey Mouse Division
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- San Francisco 49ers
- Seattle Seahawks
- Arizona Cardinals
- St. Louis Rams
You know it is a Mickey Mouse Division when:
Derek Anderson and Matt Hasselbeck are starting quarterbacks and Alex Smith is the best quarterback in the division.
The division winner would not make the playoffs unless the NFL was contractually obligated to do so.
Seattle vs. San Francisco is a marquee game.
Because I said so.
It's still Brady's world.
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- New England Patriots
- Miami Dolphins
- New York Jets
- Buffalo Bills
Why do people love the New York Jets? What am I missing here?
I know they have a great defense, they run the ball well, and they went to the AFC Championship last year, but doesn't anyone remember that this was only a 9-7 team that made the playoffs on a miracle last year?
If it wasn't for the Indianapolis Colts resting their starters, the Jets don't get in and I begin to wonder if people think this team is so great.
The real team in this division is, and will continue to be the New England Patriots as long as Tom Brady is walking onto the field.
Brady is another year removed from his knee injury, which can only add to his confidence on the field and with Wes Welker recovering from his own knee surgery, teams had better watch out for Randy Moss to emerge as the team's No. 1 target.
The biggest concern I have with the Patriots is their defense and Bill Belichick doing something wild in the playoffs like going for it on fourth down inside his own redzone.
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- Cincinnati Bengals
- Pittsburgh Steelers
- Baltimore Ravens
- Cleveland Browns
Boys and girls across America this year should dress up as Chad Ochocinco and Terrell Owens for Halloween.
Not only is it the best duo of any kind in sports or otherwise, but if these two can scare the living hell out the Baltimore and Pittsburgh defense, then imagine how terrified everyone in your neighborhood will be.
And just think about it for a second. Do you want your kids to value sportsmanship or winning?
Do companies give out raises for being a nice employee or do they give out a fat bonus because you set the world on fire with sales?
As great as I think these two are, the only reason I don't have Pittsburgh winning this division is because of Ben Roethlisberger's suspension. Once Big Ben comes back, I expect the Steelers to emerge as the best team in the AFC.
808 is code for really good
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- Houston Texans
- Indianapolis Colts
- Tennessee Titans
- Jacksonville Jaguars
Do you want a bold, bold, bold prediction?
The Indianapolis Colts will not make the playoffs.
There it is. I said it. And the best comeback you can probably have is as original as, "You're an idiot."
I will simply say that since the 2000 season, eight of the 10 teams to lose in the Super Bowl have failed to make the playoffs the following season. The only exception to the rule came from the Seattle Seahawks and Arizona Cardinals. I think we can chalk that up to the fact that they play in the Mikey Mouse division.
The Colts on the other hand play in a good division and in a superior conference.
I know, I know. The Colts have made the postseason eight years in a row, and 10 of the last 11 years. They have also won 12 or more games in eight of the last 11 years and they have Peyton Manning as their quarterback.
I get all of that.
But take a closer look at last year when the Colts opened the season 14-0. Eight of those wins were decided by one possession or less. I don't care who your quarterback is or how good the rest of your team is. When you play that many close games, you are eventually going to lose out to the law of averages.
It has nothing to do with Xs and Os. It comes down to being on the wrong side of a coin-flip scenario. And when the coin starts going against the Colts this year, they will miss the playoffs.
Can't wait for the standard postseason buckle
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- San Diego Chargers
- Oakland Raiders
- Kansas City Chiefs
- Denver Broncos
This is hands down the most boring division in football.
San Diego is so much better than the rest of the slop that clogs this division, it isn't even funny.
We all know the Chargers will win the division and then after that, it doesn't even matter because none of these teams have a chance at making the playoffs.
What is it with West Coast teams being awful?
And why do we even care about the Chargers? They're going to find a way to screw it up in the postseason yet again.
It's gonna be a classic
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Wild Card Weekend
New York vs. Dallas: This is the most painful thing an Eagles fan has to watch. At least one team has to get bounced. Eli will lose for the third time at home in the opening round of the playoffs and prove how overrated he really is.
San Francisco vs. Minnesota: Old man Favre wants another shot at the Saints and he gets it with a win here.
New Orleans vs. Minnesota: Favre returns to the scene of the crime and totally redeems himself.
Green Bay vs. Dallas: Aaron Rodgers' first playoff win lands him in the NFC Championship against Favre.
Minnesota vs. Green Bay: If this happens all of America will be glued to the TV. It's a shame Favre will do what he always does and throw another dumb pick in a big playoff game. The Packers' front office will officially look like geniuses when they punch their ticket to the Super Bowl with Aaron Rodgers.
Three straight wins on the road? Be there. Done that.
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Wild Card Weekend
Houston vs. Pittsburgh: Love him or hate him, no one can deny that Ben Roethlisberger is clutch. And honestly, clutch is everything.
Cincinnati vs. Baltimore: Can we get one home team to win on Wild Card Weekend? Cincy comes through and defends their turf.
San Diego vs. Cincinnati: If it's January and it's the playoffs then Philip Rivers will find a way to buckle.
Cincinnati vs. Pittsburgh: First we get Green Bay vs. Minnesota and then we get this divisional rival. Oh, how I hope that scenario plays out. Big Ben is going to be on Fi-Ya as he leads the Steelers to a third Super Bowl.
Please return to owner
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Green Bay vs. Pittsburgh:
Going against Big Ben in a big game doesn't seem right. Then again, it's difficult to go against Aaron Rodgers, who I believe will emerge as the best quarterback in the league this year.
The Packers and Steelers may be the two most complete teams in football. Each has a great defense and each can run and pass the ball effectively against anyone.
In the end though, I can't go against Rodgers and the Packers' big play ability.
Green Bay 30, Pittsburgh 24
If by thumbs up, you mean thumbs down
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MVP: Aaron Rodgers
Offensive MVP: Tom Brady
Defensive MVP: Mario Williams
Offensive Rookie of the Year: Jahvid Best
Defensive Rookie of the Year: Jason Pierre-Paul
Coach of the Year: Mike Tomlin—if he can guide the Steelers to the Super Bowl amidst all of the controversy, then it's a no-brainer.
Best offseason acquisition: Terrell Owens
Biggest Offensive Bust: Chris Johnson: Look, when you say you're going to break Eric Dickerson's single-season rushing mark of 2,105 yards and you don't come within 600 yards, I gotta call you out.
Biggest Defensive Bust: Albert Haynesworth
Biggest Offensive Rookie Bust: C.J. Spiller
Biggest Defensive Rookie Bust: Tyson Alualu
First coach to be fired: Todd Haley—could Charlie Weis get the gig?
Worst offseason acquisition: Brady Quinn
Best Regular Season Record: New England Patriots—they're going to go 13-3 at worst.
Biggest Surprise Team: Detroit Lions
Worst Regular Season Record: Buffalo Bills—with their quarterback situation it will be a miracle if they win four games. I say they go 2-14.
Most Disappointing Team: Indianapolis Colts—when you are seen as one of the best teams in the league and you don't make the playoffs, then you have to land here.