Let's consider this a quiz, shall we?
This player, a self-described former drug dealer, was once, in about a three week time span, arrested twice in two different cities entirely across the country from each other, no less. One arrest was for disorderly conduct, and the second arrest was for domestic violence and assault. A couple of years later, this player also gets arrested for possession of marijuana. Currently, Player A finds himself embroiled in the midst of a lawsuit, where there is an allegation that he threw a glass at a woman while in a nightclub.
This player left a birthday party, and drove home. Drunk. It would prove to be a fateful decision. This player crashed, while driving drunk. The accident resulted in the death of a woman. Six years later, this very same player was arrested for a DWI again, after clocking near 80 mph in 55 mph zone. Frighteningly, this player has never served even one day in jail, for any of this.
In 2004, this player was arrested for assaulting a law enforcement officer. A few years later, this player was arrested on a domestic violence charge after refusing to allow a taxi, containing his girlfriend, to leave his house following a domestic dispute between the two. Just a few months after that, this player was arrested for a DUI. Less than a year later, this player was then booked on misdemeanor battery charges. Incredibly, less than one year after THAT, this player was then arrested for disorderly conduct, after being involved in a fight with his fiancee.
Finally, there is Player D. This player is... well... he's a jerk. Actually, he is more than a jerk. However, for the matter of keeping the language in this article appropriate, let's call him a jerk. Essentially, he's gotten into well-documented disagreements with three different quarterbacks for three different teams. He publicly mishandled a couple of contract disputes, including one in particular where he memorably put on a public workout session in the driveway of his home, much to the glee of the media. And overall, this player has made it pretty much very well known that... well... he loves him, some him. And he seems particularly fond of popcorn.
All of these players have made significant contributions to the NFL during their playing careers. One is a Super Bowl MVP. One, in spite of his troubles, has gone on to have a very good NFL career, all with the same team. A third player was recently one of the biggest off-season acquisitions of an NFL team seeking to become a serious Super Bowl contender, and received a whopping new contract along with that. And the fourth player has had a stellar career, with near, if not full, Hall of Fame worthy stats. But with all of these issues and accomplishments, one of these players stand out.
Player D stands out from the rest of these players, in more ways than the obvious. You see, it is obvious in reading this far, that Player D... while a jerk... has not been arrested for anything. He didn't kill anyone. He didn't drive drunk. He didn't assault any police officers, or his girlfriend. He didn't kill any dogs, or stupidly shoot himself in the leg, while carrying an illegal weapon. He didn't lure any drunk college girls into any unattended public restrooms... uh... sorry, wrong article. But you get the gist.
rich_one is a Jabberhead and an SJ contributing author. Rich originates his recurring "The Yard Marker" column exclusively from Sports Jabber.
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