They are khaki, pleated and, from the looks of it, pretty darn comfortable. However, those seemingly innocuous pants San Francisco 49ers head coach Jim Harbaugh wears are tearing his family apart.
OK, that might be a bit strong, but they were cause for wife Sarah Harbaugh to call into CBS San Francisco's 99.7 show Fernando and Greg in the Morning to deliver possibly the funniest playoff subplot thus far.
UPDATE: Wednesday, Jan. 15 at 5:40 p.m. ET
It's a sad day for fans of pleated pants and coaches who might wear them. NFL.com's Chris Wesseling reports Harbaugh has heard his wife's pleas, and he is making some changes.
Now that his wife has made a public plea to ditch the $8 Walmart pleated khakis, Harbaugh has made a slight adjustment to his wardrobe.
He switched to flat-front tan khakis for Wednesday's press conference.
"Problem solved there," Harbaugh quipped to reporters. "The Levi's or the Nike and the Dickie makes a flat khaki. So 'happy wife, happy life.' As far as tuckin' the shirt goes, that will be great. I'll feel like an innovator."
As for the cost of his new duds, they come at a hipster price tag of $23. Now we fully expect Harbaugh to helicopter into the stadium with an entourage of followers. When people get new pants, they just have a way of changing.
UPDATE: Wednesday, Jan. 15 at 3:05 p.m. ET
If you wanted a visual of what it looks like for Harbaugh to shop for khakis, you are in luck. A big tip of the hat to Twitter user Austin who explains with the following tweets:
And here he is getting specific with For the Win's Chris Chase:
@chaztopher yes sir. Wal-Mart on Lafayette road here in Indy. I first posted the pics on fb and they have the location tags— Austin (@Matt_5_9) January 15, 2014
I love you, Internet.
---End of Update---
Really, it's hard not to make it to the end of this story and not enjoy the Harbaughs a bit more than you did previously.
Apparently, the hosts were talking about Harbaugh and his fashion decisions, a topic that led to Sarah actually calling in to defend herself. CBS San Francisco delivers a transcript as well as full audio of the lighthearted exchange.
In no uncertain terms, Sarah states, "I will not take the blame for his outfits." Now, those of us who live off a favorite pair of jeans think you mean take credit, but continue.
"I’ve thrown them away many of times. I’ve asked him ‘Please, pleats are gone. Wear the flat front.’" The impetus behind the issue isn't just style, but Harbaugh's complete disinterest with showing off what he is working with, apparently. "He has a flattering body."
You don't keep that sweet convertible ride in the garage, and you don't keep the assets hidden. Flaunt it, Coach.
Now, the best and most endearing part of the interview is Harbaugh's constant fight to maintain his khaki comfort. According to Sarah, she has tossed them out only to see them return again.
She starts, however, by explaining her husband's stubborn ways:
"I know you can't change your outfit at this point in your career, because, you know, that's just the way. ... He won't get a new car. He won't do things that make a change that could change other things."
She didn't go as far to call him superstitious, but she did get the sartorially stubborn coach to agree to have some sort of makeover after the season, so a new look could be on the way.
The hosts then continue, asking Sarah where he gets his classic pants. Well, there is only one place on earth that you too can look like Harbaugh—minus the red-faced outrage he likes to pepper into his look a few times a game.
"It's not just any store; you have to find them at a Walmart. I threw them out and when he went to the combine, he found a Walmart. They were $8. $8!"
Batman, Superman and Harbaugh all have a distinct look. Coincidence? Yes, of course it is. However, it's important to have your own style, something the great fashionistas of our day understand. Screech Powers, Steve Urkel and Harbaugh all moved the needle of the fashion world, and we applaud them today.
Jim Harbaugh's iconic look takes hard work, consistent effort and the deals that come with rummaging through a Walmart bin.
Please don't change, Coach. If only for the fact that some of us really need an inexpensive and comfortable alternative for a Halloween costume every year.
If you do change, make sure you maintain what makes you a unique coach in this league. I'm thinking cargo shorts.
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