How About That Rundown: Things You Should Have Known Before the 2009 NFL Draft

(Photo by Gregory Shamus/Getty Images)

Unlike me, you may not have been following all the NFL news since the offseason began. Sometimes people have lives. That’s OK—so I am told.

In order for you to keep your edge and get in the right state of mind now that football is only a few months away, you just might need a rundown of the news you may have missed or overlooked during your hiatus from the land of football.

The thing about Marshawn Lynch is…

Lynch received a three-game suspension thanks to his increasing talent of finding himself in bad situations at bad times (and somehow also avoiding any major legal consequences).

The Bills will be without his services to start the season, but they have also acquired Dominic Rhodes to help them out while their workhorse running back pays his debt to society the NFL.

Fred Jackson is still said to be the starter in Lynch’s absence, but Rhodes may win the hearts of the coaching staff before the end of camp. He’s got a pretty good talent for that.

The Jenny Craig Effect

Both Daunte Culpepper and David Garrard returned to their teams from the offseason a little lighter and a little more in shape. For Culpepper, claiming he was in the best shape of his life since he was a good quarterback might have led Detroit to believe they were safe with him under center in 2009.(Unfortunately for him, no such luck.)

For Garrard, his lightened load could mean his ability to get out of the pocket and run is on the rise. If you remember his run in the playoffs against the Steelers, he can get up and going pretty quickly for a big guy. With a little less weight, he might do it more often in 2009.

And then there’s the fat one...

On the other end of the weight shift, Adrian Peterson claims he wants to beef it up for 2009. Unfortunately for Peterson, that weight can’t all be added around his knees, which are almost ready for their next breakdown after he made it through 2009 mostly unscathed.

The wrath cometh, no matter much bacon you pack on those bones, A.P.

Coles becomes a Bengal (pending felony conviction)

Yes, I know that most of the Bengals are trying to get the team's reputation under control, but then they go out and sign Tank Johnson, and yeah, that’s not working so well.

Laveranues Coles obviously didn’t want to wait around and see what one-armed batting practice machine became the man for the Jets in 2009, so he took a deal with the Bengals as somewhat of a replacement to T.J. Houshmandzadeh.

I wouldn’t exactly call him the perfect complement to Chad Johnson, but he’s got a pulse and no parole, unlike Chris Henry.

Matt Hasselbeck has a back again

Hasselbeck told us all he was healthy before the draft—mostly because he wanted to make sure a little punk like Mark Sanchez or Matthew Stafford didn't get drafted onto the Seahawks’ bench to wait for him to injure his back again.

It remains to be seen how much Hasselbeck will be able to do when the season starts after his injury-plagued 2008 season.

Well, I guess if Jay’s gone…

Tony Scheffler, the tight end companion of choice of Jay Cutler, may no longer have a home in Denver now that Josh McDaniels has arrived to kick everyone out of the party and start a math club that worships Belichick.

But was he the Right-wich?

The Bucs signed Byron Leftwich to be their quarterbacks of the now—or was it all just a clever smokescreen for their Josh Freeman pick? Leftwich is an upgrade over the quarterbacks currently developed in the Bucs’ stable, but they may still be overlooking what they have in Josh Johnson.

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