Keyshawn Johnson hopped into his vigilante mobile to chase down Justin Bieber, one of Calabasas' most nefarious vehicular villains.
TMZ reports on a tale as tantalizing as Batman taking on The Joker and as action-packed as a Michael Bay fever dream.
Update: Wednesday, May 29 at 4:15 p.m. ET
Yes, an already remarkable story continues to unfold, because NFL.com reports police are now investigating the matter further.
Sheriff's spokesman Steve Whitmore told the AP that Johnson arrived at Bieber's home and used his arm to stop the garage door from closing. Johnson told Bieber he wanted to talk about his reckless driving. According to the AP, Bieber "scurried" into his home without saying a word.
There may be misdemeanor charges in Biebs' future because, "Deputies plan to send a reckless driving report to the Los Angeles County District Attorney's Office."
---End of update---
It seems the former NFL star wide receiver was driving around a normally serene, "exclusive gated community in Calabasas" when he noticed Bieber speeding past him in a Ferrari.
Johnson had his child in the car, so he had to swing by his house to drop him off before embarking on a trip for truth, justice and sensible driving habits.
Here is how it all went down, according to TMZ:
We're told Keyshawn was furious—feeling Justin could've killed someone—so he brought his kid home, then chased after the singer in his Prius (yes, a Prius chasing a Ferrari).
When KJ got to Bieber's pad, he blocked Justin's Ferrari in the driveway and got out of his car to confront Justin face-to-face...but Justin ran inside of his house and refused to come out.
It seems Johnson is hardly the only person frustrated with Bieber and his penchant for driving around at ridiculous speeds throughout the neighborhood. The report states that at least two other people called the cops on Bieber that night, and several proclaimed it was most definitely the pop singer in the driver's seat.
As if this story didn't already have everything, here is a tweet from NFL legend Eric Dickerson:
Eric Dickerson @EricDickerson
I live in Calabasas too and @justinbieber needs to slow his ass down.5/28/2013, 4:58:56 PM
Now we have all the necessary ingredients for a hit Hollywood movie—or at the very least a melodramatic miniseries on the Hallmark Channel.
We'll keep you updated of any new information on a scandal that is rocking the very core of what should be a tranquil, gated community.
The scourge of Calabasas can drive as fast and as far as he wants, but at some point, justice will catch up to him.
Justice, by the way, drives a Prius.
Hit me up on Twitter for more highly important sports updates: Follow @gabezal