Sports Lists

According to Mets Player, You Can Survive Justin Verlander Fastball to Groin

Photo Credit: Yahoo! Sports
Photo Credit: Yahoo! Sports
Gabe ZaldivarPop Culture Lead WriterMarch 11, 2013

Jordany Valdespin got hit in the groin with a Justin Verlander fastball that clocked in at 94 miles per hour. Somehow, he lived to joke about it.

Yahoo! Sports does a tap dance of sorts in reporting on yet another baseball injury that might interest fans. 

Indeed, some of the quotes and tweets are both hilarious and a tad NSFW, so consider cyber earmuffs if you need them. 

The Mets utility infielder had apparently homered off Verlander earlier in the game, so you know he was feeling pretty good about himself as he entered the batter's box the next time around. 

We'll let Verlander do the play-by-play thanks to a quote he provided to Tigers beat writer, Chris Iott

Chuckles continue when we finally got word from the man who took one too many fastballs to the junk today, as well as a very specific placement of said fastball, via Mike Puma's Twitter

Yes, this is a funny story, but it's a little overblown when you consider he was wearing a cup. I mean, you have to be an idiot to enter a game without one. 

Wait, what? He wasn't wearing one?

Well, this just makes Valdespin both dumb and legendary. They will one day write poems in honor of his most special of places that stood in defiance to a 94 mph heater. 

Hell, I had to rummage through some old boxes and put on my cup just to write this thing. As we all know, baseball players aren't the brightest when it comes to being safe, but this has to be the offseason winner for bizarre injuries. 

Not to worry, despite not wearing a cup and taking one in the groin, Valdespin is doing just fine. 

That will teach him to hit a home run off Verlander. Actually, that will teach him about the dangers of not wearing a cup. 

There seems to be a lot of life lessons being taught at the moment, all of them of extreme import.

 

Hit me up on Twitter for more sage wisdom. 

Where can I comment?

Stay on your game

Latest news, insights, and forecasts on your teams across leagues.

Choose Teams
Get it on the App StoreGet it on Google Play

Real-time news for your teams right on your mobile device.

Download
Copyright © 2017 Bleacher Report, Inc. Turner Broadcasting System, Inc. All Rights Reserved. BleacherReport.com is part of Bleacher Report – Turner Sports Network, part of the Turner Sports and Entertainment Network. Certain photos copyright © 2017 Getty Images. Any commercial use or distribution without the express written consent of Getty Images is strictly prohibited. AdChoices