Here are the main things you should look for today during the two divisional playoff games.
New Orleans Saints vs. San Francisco 49ers
Potential Announcer Cliches
"Great defense meets a great offense," and "An unstoppable force meets an immovable object." Kenny Albert will be announcing the game today, and although he falls somewhere in the middle of my extreme feelings about announcers, the decisive divide in playing styles could easily cause Albert to fall into this trap.
Tony Siragusa Roaming Alert
He'll be standing near the mascot in the back of some endzone, spouting non sequiturs that have little relevance to the game/life.
Alex Smith in the Playoffs?
Alex Smith in the playoffs. I'm still letting this sink in, too.
Potential Blowout Alert
The 49ers are the No. 2 seed, but an offense so dependent on the left leg of David Akers will have trouble keeping up with the Saints. The Saints rarely score big on the road, however, and the Niners obviously have the potential to stop the Saints on offense. That said, I just envision Alex Smith having some sort of catastrophic meltdown and the Saints capitalizing on the destruction of said human being. Most prognosticators have this game ending close, but I just don't see it. Forever a cynic.
Also, is Drew Brees' baby a thing anymore? I would like to the Saints in the Super Bowl only to see if he grew a beard yet.
Denver Broncos vs. New England Patriots
Tim Tebow Alert
Tim Tebow is playing in this game.
Hey, It's Phil Simms!
Sigh. Another week of Simms publicly fawning over Tebow's ground balls and overthrows. I guess we can stand another week of this, or can just use the footage to torture terrorists or the common prisoner with. Do you think Simms actually likes Tebow, or is just playing the foil to Jim Nantz's relative indifference? Either way, it seems like Simms is doodling crayon-colored hearts into his notebook while babbling about the "great throwaways" of Tim Tebow.
Relevant Rap Lyrics
"C-note after C-note put the remix on my kilo, thought I wouldn't make it now I'm winning Timothy Tebow" -- Rick Ross, "F--k Em"
"I am on my Tom Brady y'all n---as is Eric Crouch" -- Wale, "Pandemonium"
Potential Blowout Alert
This one is probably more like than the previous game, because the potential for Tebow collapse is higher than that of Smith collapse. This game can two ways, as far as I see it. One, the Patriots blow out the Broncos, destroying the defense and annihilating Tebow for 60 minutes. Two, the Broncos keep up with the Patriots, a real possibility due to the fact that the Patriots are really, really bad at stopping even the worse teams. The Broncos have a chance if the second scenario happens.
Skip Bayless Wants This Team to Win
The Broncos, I assume. I don't watch that god-awful show, come on now.