Tim Tebow: The 12 Days of Christmas

"The 12 Days of Christmas" is outdated, overrated and incomplete.  Just look:

On the 12th day of Christmas
my true love sent to me:

• 12 Drummers Drumming
• Eleven Pipers Piping
• Ten Lords a Leaping
• Nine Ladies Dancing
• Eight Maids a Milking
• Seven Swans a Swimming
• Six Geese a Laying
• Five Golden Rings
• Four Calling Birds
• Three French Hens
• Two Turtle Doves
• and a Partridge in a Pear Tree 

This year, all I want for Christmas is you, Tim Tebow! 

Here are The 12 15 Days of Tim Tebow.

On the 15th Day of Christmas, Tim Tebow Sent to Me: 15 No. 15 Jerseys

According the CNBC.com, “the quarterback of the Denver Broncos has fans buying No. 15 Tim Tebow jerseys with confidence.

"Tebow had the second best-selling jersey on NFLShop.com last week—only behind Green Bay Packers quarterback Aaron Rodgers—and he's moved up five spots this month alone to the sixth best-selling jersey from April through November on the league's online store.

"Tebow was the best-selling jersey last year from draft day through December 3, but he finished in March at No. 5 due to the fact that he wasn't playing and the Broncos not making the playoffs. Lack of play resulted in Tebow's jersey falling to the No. 24 spot through the end of September, but his success as a starter has turned things around.

On the 14th Day of Christmas, Tim Tebow Sent to Me: 14 Foxes (Out)Foxing

The National said of Broncos coach John Fox,

"With his defensive background, Fox was tasked primarily to revamp the NFL 2011-12 league's worst unit last year. It is vastly improved, especially in crunch time, having allowed six points in the final quarters of the past four games."

"His overhaul of an offence blessed—and, at times, cursed—by quarterback Tim Tebow is what elevates Fox above his colleagues."

"Fox realised that Tebow was a round peg in the square hole of a pro-style set. The Broncos were 1-4 when the bye week arrived."

"The offense was junked, replaced by a college-style read-option."

"The Broncos have eclipsed 30 points twice during a 6-1 run that has them in the play-off hunt. Turnovers, the bane of any team, have nearly been eradicated; Tebow has thrown one interception."

On the 13th Day of Christmas, Tim Tebow Sent to Me: 13 Points A’Scoring

Denver Post headline: "Broncos, Tim Tebow rally late, again, to beat Chicago Bears 13-10 in OT"  

Read more.

Sure, the Broncos aren't scoring much.  But they are scoring more than their opponents. 

Unlike in figure skating, there aren't points for style.  A win is a win is a win.

On the 12th Day of Christmas, Tim Tebow Sent to Me: 12 Plummers A’Dumbing

In an interview with 910-AM in Phoenix, Jake Plummer said that, while he enjoys the way Tim Tebow plays, he would prefer if Tebow quit proselytizing so much.

“I wish he’d just shut up after a game and go hug his teammates,” Plummer said, via SportsRadioInterviews.com. “I think that when he accepts the fact that we know that he loves Jesus Christ then I think I’ll like him a little better. I don’t hate him because of that, I just would rather not have to hear that every time he takes a good snap or makes a good handoff.”

On the 11th Day of Christmas, Tim Tebow Sent to Me: 11 Pythons A’Piping

The Examiner says Tim Tebow has really strong biceps (so does my wife).

“His recently-published autobiography (Through My Eyes, Harper Books, 2011) will do little to change opinions on either side of the aisle.

"Those who already support him will enjoy reading personal anecdotes, both the obscure (winning a high school summer camp strength contest by performing 315 consecutive bicep curls, engaging in long drive and football throwing contests with Phil Mickelson) and the well-documented (Tebow’s tearful, heartfelt press conference that kick-started Florida’s run to a win in the 2009 BCS championship game)."

On the 10th Day of Christmas, Tim Tebow Sent to Me: 10 “Lordys” I’m A'Leaping

Get on Twitter.  Search "Tim Tebow Heart Attack."  Prepare to read for a while. 

Have you had this much fun watching football? 

Broncos games haven't been this exciting since Elway left.  I actually feel emotions (mostly terror and elation) again. 

It is like I'm nine years old, scared to move lest I jinx the team.  Yet, this racing heart and sweaty feet is all really refreshing (if not great-smelling). 

Through the Griese, Plummer, Cutler, Orton years, I found myself becoming detached and apathetic.  Sure, I watched every game, but I never had the highs or the lows of the Elway years. 

Now, I'm riding a roller coaster unlike anything before.  I'm on the couch a nervous wreck one minute, then I'm jumping up and down, screaming things like, "Can you believe this," (when I'm the only one in the room), "Oh my God," (which is oddly fitting) and "I've never seen anything like this" (and I grew up on John Elway!).

My body can't take too much more of this.  I have to have my heart checked.  I'm pretty sure I'm suffering from an acute case of Broncohitis that is exacerbated by a touch of Tebosteoperosis. 

And it is indeed a roller coaster.  Have you ever seen such compelling (yet often ugly) football.

The Denver Post's Woody Paige had a another analogy for it: The Denver Broncos are like a Steig Larson novel (The Girl With The Dragon Tattoo), a bit hard to get into up front, but a great payoff if you stick around.  For those that don't read, trust me, he is right. 

Now go see the movie!

On the Ninth Day of Christmas, Tim Tebow Sent to Me: Nine TDs Dancing

Fact: In under two seasons, Tim Tebow has nine rushing TDs.  

This ability to run the ball is one reason for Tebow's success later in the games, when he has often struggled to complete passes earlier.

ESPN's TMQ, always on target in his analysis, said this:

"Denver has become the NFL's top rushing team, and the running game often starts slowly. In the first half the defense is fresh, and may stop the run. By the fourth quarter, the front seven is tired and becomes vulnerable. Denver is hammering opponents with rush after rush in the early part of the game, and seeming not to accomplish much. Then the Broncos switch to attack mode in the fourth quarter, when the defense is tired."

It may be time to put less emphasis on completions.  Would you prefer to have a QB like Jake Plummer who complete 9-of-10 five-yard passes (usually on 3rd-and-9!), or have somebody who only completes a few, but does so A) when it matters, and B) for first downs and touchdowns.

It may be time to put less emphasis on passing yards.  Teams that have thrown for 300 and 400 yards in a game have losing records this year.  These fantasy stats are built as the team is trying to make a desperate comeback.

And isn't it funny that people are quick to note that Tebow only completes passes late in games against the prevent...and that is the exact time that all QBs are padding their stats.

Instead, focus on running the ball.  When teams run the ball more than 50 times a game, they are 30-2.

On the Eighth Day of Christmas, Tim Tebow Sent to Me: Eight “8”s A’Sulking

In the 26 games before Tim Tebow became the full-time starter, the Broncos' record was 6-20.

In the 11 games he has started, they are 8-3.

How is this turnaround not directly related to Tebow again?

In the previous two seasons, the Broncos defense was ranked in the bottom three in almost every category.  Last year, they were ranked dead last.

This season, including the 7-1 period with Tebow at the helm, the Denver defense is in the bottom third of almost every major category (yards, points, takeaways). 

Imagine what the Broncos defense was ranked while they were 1-4.  Sure, it's just coincidence that after three-and-a-half years of being the worst defense in the league, they suddenly jump 15 spots when Tebow takes over.

Now, I'm not naive enough to think that Tebow is the only reason—he doesn't play defense after all. But I do think he is probably the most important reason.  This may be due to ball control and grinding the clock, or it may be due to leadership and inspiration. 

I also find it funny that many sports pundits only want to give credit to the defense, to the kicker or to being lucky.  Surely, the Broncos have had contributions in all those areas.  But every QB benefits from defense. 

The Packers lead the league in takeaways (the year New Orleans won the Super Bowl, so did they).  Ben Roethlisberger only beat Kurt Warner in the Super Bowl because James Harrison had a 100-yard interception return right before half, giving a 14-point swing. 

Every QB benefits from good kicking and from luck.

Tom Brady's first two Super Bowl wins were won on kicks, not TD passes.  Brady** only got to the Super Bowl that season because of the lucky "Tuck Rule" game.   Eli Manning only beat Tom Brady in the Super Bowl because of a lucky "helmet catch." 

**In that first Super Bowl season, Tom Brady averaged 177.5 yards passing a game.  That is about what Tim Tebow is averaging.  Why is it, again, nobody thinks that Tim may improve with experience?

Last time I checked, Brady is among the all-time great passers.  His first year? Pedestrian.

On the Seventh Day of Christmas, Tim Tebow Sent to Me: No. 7 Wantsa’be A’Winning

"John Elway has made it clear he won't heap praise upon Tim Tebow just because he happens to be his team's starting quarterback."

But Elway—the Broncos' executive vice president of football operations—has a very pro-Tebow feeling as to why Denver continues to pull off unlikely victories like Sunday's against the Chicago Bears.

"I think when you look at it, I guess I just believe everyone believes that something good is going to happen," Elway said Monday during his weekly radio spot on KDSP-FM. "Tim's been the guy that has led that thinking and he's just such a strong believer. He's got everyone else believing that if you stay strong, stay positive, that something good is going to happen."

Read more here.

My advice to John Elway is that he quit ignoring the Tebow Effect.  Just imagine if Elway trades Tim Tebow to Jacksonville, drafts Landry Jones and the Broncos have another boring, mediocre run.  It would wipe out every on-field accomplishment he ever had in the hearts of Broncos nation.

Nobody is bigger than John Elway in Denver.  No athlete has ever been more closely tied to a city. But Tim Tebow is the most popular (or unpopular, depending) person—not just athlete—in the United States. 

When my mom is asking me about Tim Tebow, he is big.  When an athlete is being discussed on O'Reilly and The View, when an athlete has his own SportsCenter edition, a The Year of the QB documentary, and several hour-long specials on NFL Network all in a matter of months/weeks/days, it is something special.

Tim Tebow may be the first American athlete who plays football to become a global icon. 

Remember, boxing and basketball are mostly global, so it is understandable that Ali and Jordan could be so popular.  But nobody else plays American Football. 

Trust me—Tim Tebow is going global.  And John Elway will underestimate that at his own peril.

On the Sixth Day of Christmas, Tim Tebow Sent to Me: Six Geeks A’Praying

"Tebowing" is officially a word.  Finally. 

I've been praying about that forever.  Or a few weeks.

"The Global Language Monitor announced Monday that it acknowledges that the word Tebowing has officially entered the English language.

The website, which monitors global language trends, said in a statement to USA Today that the rapid rise of "Tebowing" as a word "has seldom been equaled, mirroring, for example, the rate of adoption of the word Obamamania in early 2008."

"Tebowing" officially entered the lexicon of Americans after the immensely popular Tebow led a comeback victory over the Miami Dolphins in his first start of the season on Oct. 23."

Tebow and Tebowing is a phenomenon (or a pandemic).  It is global in scale.  It is a hurricane force, an ATM machine, and maybe the most recognizable new icon in the world.  It will be like Jordan's jumpman, McDonald's arches and Coke's cursive.

Heck, it may be like Jesus' cross.  People say that God has better things to do than help Tim Tebow win football games.  My thought is, well Tim Tebow keeps winning football games, and last time I checked, global catastrophes keep on happening.  I think God must take his own advice, keep thy sabbath holy, not do any work, and watch some football.

And why wouldn't He?  At a time when people are more cynical than ever, when the Catholic Church is embroiled in controversy, when church attendance is faltering, using Tim Tebow as a mouth-piece to spread His word is a great idea.

How many non-believers are looking at Tim Tebow, his faith, and more importantly, what Tebow has achieved due to his faith, and saying, "I want THAT."

Don't be surprised if Tebow saves souls and saves the church, not just the Denver Broncos.

And for those of you who are already believers, or for those of you who never will be, you can just partake in that other great American religious tradition: consumption.  Now, you can finally get a Tebowing Fathead, which is one of two top-selling Tebow-related items!

(Oddly, isn't putting a Tebowing Fathead on your wall and looking up to it False Idolatry?!  Oh, I'm so confused.)

On the Fifth Day of Christmas, Tim Tebow Sent to Me: Fiiive Super Bowlll Riiings

"Not one, not two, not three, not four, ...not six, not seven."

Simply five Super Bowl rings will suffice to set the all-time record for one QB. 

Tim Tebow is the anti-Lebron, the anti-Romo and the QB version of Adam Vinatieri: he is clutch when it matters.

What seemed unfathomable just eight weeks ago now seems possible.  The Broncos are going to go to the playoffs, and once there, who knows?

For all the disparaging of the Broncos "old fashioned offense," who is going to be most prepared to play a January game in snow weather in New England, Pittsburgh or New York? 

For all the disparaging of Tim Tebow as a running QB, which 180-pound corner with ice in his bones (but not in his blood) is going to want to tackle the 240-pound freight train of a QB?

Tim Tebow won championships at every level.  The cream always rises to the top. 

Why would we think Tim Tebow isn't going to win an NFL championship?

On the Fourth Day of Christmas, Tim Tebow Sent to Me: Four Falling Birds***

The Cardinals, Eagles, Falcons and Ravens will all bow down to Tebow before all is said and done.

***Seattle isn't included in this list because a Seahawk isn't a real bird.  Or a real football team.

On the Third Day of Christmas, Tim Tebow Sent to Me: Three First Downs

(After three three-and-outs.)

OK, so the Broncos' offense can be a bit boring. 

Not to mention, the offense can be downright dreadful.  Yet, it is improving. 

Denver has the second youngest offensive line.  Our receivers drop more balls than a middle-school locker room (get it? puberty).  Willis McGahee is 743 years old in Running Back Years (which are even faster than dog years), and was thought to be on his last legs. 

Our only Pro Bowl skill player was traded on the eve of Tebow starting.

Of course the offense will stink!  I love when people say that the Broncos win in spite of Tebow, not because of him.

I promise you this: If Aaron Rodgers played the last eight games in Denver, his record would be .500 at best.  If Tim Tebow played his last eight games in Green Bay, he would be 7-1 at worst. 

Let Tebow play with some guys like Marshawn Lynch, Calvin Johnson or Rob Gronkowski.  Watch as his completion percentage, passing yards, and point scored all magically soar.

It ain't about the Xs and the Os...it's the Rexes and the Joes.  And right now, the Broncos are lacking a bunch of Rexes and Joes.

On the Second Day of Christmas, Tim Tebow Sent to Me: Two Nike Gloves

(And some Jockey undies, too!)

I will take two of whatever it is Tim Tebow is selling.  Whether it is FRS Energy drinks or holy water, I'm in.

It could be Nike, Jockey, Focus on the Family (well...) or a bunch of Pet Rocks.  I'm buying.

This is just one more reason Elway can't trade Tebow. 

Pat Bowlen isn't as rich as some owners.  If you think he isn't ready to cash in on Tebz, you are crazy. 

Even if Elway wants to get rid of "Timmy,"*** there is a solid chance that Bowlen overrules him.

Don't get rid of the Golden Goose!

***I hate that Elway uses this term, "Timmy," like Tebow's family does.  You can tell that Elway isn't using it out of fondness, but as a way to marginalize Tebow.

On the First Day of Christmas, Tim Tebow Sent to Me: A Part of NFL HIS-Story!

Adam Schefter reports for ESPN:

• "When Denver won at San Diego in Week 12, Tebow had 22 rushing attempts, the most by a quarterback in any game since the merger in 1970.

• When Denver beat the Jets in Week 11, Tebow's 20-yard touchdown run with 58 seconds remaining in the fourth quarter became the longest game-winning touchdown run by a quarterback in the final minute of the fourth quarter in NFL history.

• When Denver won at Kansas City in Week 10, Tebow became the first quarterback with more rushes than passes in a game since Joe Ferguson did it for Buffalo in 1974.

• When Denver won at Oakland in Week 9, Tebow rushed for 117 yards and joined Norris Weese as the only Broncos quarterbacks to rush for 100 yards in a game.

• And when Denver won at Miami in Week 7, Tebow helped the Broncos become the first team in NFL history to win a game when it trailed by 15-plus points with three minutes remaining."

And just think, we are all witness!  Witness to the 15 Days of Timmy Tebow Christmas!