Mormon Vice President Debate Drinking Game

Parker DonatContributor IOctober 2, 2008

Prepare yourself for this Thursday’s vice presidential debate by printing out the rules below for this year’s Mormon Vice Presidential Debate Drinking Game!

USE SPARKLING APPLE CIDER, HOT APPLE CIDER, EGGNOG, Or (MY FAVORITE) ROOTBEER. (NO ALCOHOL, cause we’re Mormon, if you have any questions about the Word of Wisdom go to The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saint’s Website)

Without further delay, I bring you the rules (by Slander 08).

For Sarah Palin:

  1. Every time Palin mentions one of her kids by name, take the number of drinks corresponding to that child’s number in her brood (e.g. 1 drink for Track, 2 drinks for Bristol, 3 drinks for Willow, 4 drinks for Piper and 5 drinks for Trig).  If she does not give a name, take 1 drink.
  2. When Palin mentions 9/11 (e.g. “We need to prevent another attack like the one on 9/11″), take 1 drink.  When Palin mentions 9/11 and her son, (e.g. “When my son Track was sent over to Iraq on 9/11…”), take 2 drinks.
  3. If Palin uses the phrase, “hockey mom”, drink until she takes the self-satisfied smirk off her face.

For Joe Biden:

  1. Every time Biden chuckles condescendingly at Sarah Palin, take 1 drink.  Every time Biden chuckles condescendingly at moderator Gwen Ifill, take 2 drinks.
  2. Every time Biden refers to himself in the third person, take 1 drink.  If he uses his full name (e.g. “When people ask me, ‘Joe Biden, how did you become so good looking?’”), take 2 drinks.
  3. If Biden points out that despite being less than 1/100th the size, Delaware has more people than Alaska, drink until you see the bottom of your glass.

If either candidate says:

  1. Russia, take 1 drink.  U.S.S.R., take 2 drinks.  Swimming the Bering Straight, take 3 drinks.
  2. Hillary Clinton, take 1 drink.  Bill Clinton, take 2 drinks.  Monica Lewinsky, take 3 drinks.
  3. Dick Cheney, take 1 drink.

So if your not Mormon please drink responsibly. Drinking makes people do horrible things. So have fun out there and by the way if you are my friend and you want to watch the debate with me, I will be watching the U of U  versus Oregon St. football game anyway. So please do not disturb my peaceful state.

Posted in Funny, Religion   Tagged: Drinking, LDS, Mormon, Word of Wisdom