EPL, Bundesliga, Serie A and Carling Cup: A Roundup of the Weekend in Football

Blue RooContributor IIMarch 1, 2011

What have I done?
What have I done?Shaun Botterill/Getty Images

Well, what a weekend. We saw Dortmund blitz Bayern, Juventus slip from bad to worse, West Ham shock Liverpool, City bore the crap out of everyone against Fulham and Arsenal pull the most hilarious attempt at effing up a certain title since Milan's capitulation on that famous night in Istanbul.

Firstly, the Dortmund performance. Bayern were totally outclassed by the incredible Dortmund, and the woeful Sebastian Schweini was taught a lesson in how to be a holding midfielder by Dortmund's best player Nuri Sahin, whose rise has been phenomenal. Also, gotta love an unwanted player (Mats Hummels) getting one over their former club, and in the process, making said club look like total twats. Anyway, Dortmund outclassed Bayern and knocked Munchen out of the title race, whilst all but securing their own Bundesliga triumph.

Onward to Juve. Wow, what utter rubbish. Really playing some terrible stuff compared to the start of the season. Delneri and Marotta are out of their depth, signings have been poor and are costing way too much, and the 4-4-2 without a left winger is beyond rubbish. They will be lucky to finish even in the top seven this season, as there are more deserving sides. Losing to Bologna is simply not an option for La Vecchia Signora. I feel for the fans—the poor guys.

Next in line, West Ham! Wow, just wow! If they keep playing like that, relegation is no worries. Totally outclassed Liverpool, and that Thomas Hitzlsperger is quite a player, he's really giving the wonderful Scott Parker a boost in midfield. Demba Ba is excellent and may well save West Ham. Liverpool were beaten all ends up and will be very worried at the loss of the brilliant Martin Kelly. Just when things were turning 'round for the scousers under King Kenny, they manage to screw up. Liverpool's fall is wonderful to watch for the neutral—sickening for the supporter.

Now, Man City. As a City fan, I'm disgusted. Total crap, deserved to lose and sick of the home point-dropping to Fulham. Without David Silva, our midfield is atrocious and without Kompany and De jong we look very weak at the back. Now is the time for players like Jerome Boateng and Aleks Kolarov to stand up and be counted or leave before it gets ugly for them. Anyway, lethargic for the 90, Balotelli poor, despite a great strike, and it says it all when Patrick Vieira comes on and actually improves a team. Fair play to Fulham though; they were excellent.

Finally, the most hilarious thing I've seen in a while—Arsenal's screw-up versus Birmingham—4/1 favourites to win and they were poor. They can whinge about no Fabregas and no Theo I-have-no-footballing-brain Walcott, but at the end of the day, Arsenal should beat Birmingham. The Midlands team wanted it more and got the result they deserved and should've had a penalty and a numerical advantage inside three minutes.

Arsenal were weak at the back, sloppy in midfield and lacking a cutting edge in attack. Congratulations to Alex McLeish and Birmingham for ending the 50-year trophy drought, and here's to staying in the EPL! Also, this really could kill Arsenal's season. They are known for their late collapses, and with injuries to key players, as well as the possibility of facing Man Utd in the cup and having to play Barcelona in the CL, the Premier League looks like Arsenal's most realistic chance of winning silverware.

Thanks for reading; that's the roundup of the main matches from the weekend in football.

This article was first seen on my blog, Xavi's Through Balls: http://xavisthroughballs.blogspot.com/