ZAKUMI'S DIARY: EPISODE FOUR

SUBTITLE: ROUNDING UP ROUND TWO

Well, well, well, it’s true what they say, time flies when you’re having fun. I can’t believe we are through with 32 World Cup matches already. We are right in the middle of it and everything is beginning to shape up nicely. The pretenders ( a la England, France et al) are being separated from the real contenders ( I’m looking at Brazil, Argentina, Holland, Uruguay and the likes).

But before we come to that, let’s look at some of the news making the headlines. I’ll start with the Nicholas Anelka expulsion from the French squad. We all know Nicholas Anelka to be a bit of a sulk but as far as this issue is concerned I think Raymond Domenech has to bear a big portion of the blame. The whole thing has got to do with the French’s poor performance against the Uruguayans and subsequently against the Mexicans. Even though it’s not clear what really happened, it’s rumoured that Nicholas Anelka (alias Birdman) launched a “foul-mouthed tirade against Domenech”.

Personally I don’t endorse blaming coaches for defeats, but when it’s got to do with Raymond Domenech, I think I’ll turn a blind eye, a deaf ear and even a dead nose. As one newspaper puts it “Everybody hates Ray” and I’m no exception. He makes it far easier for some of us to chide him. It’s like a girl dressing scantly for a party, boys will definitely want to have a go at you. From his team selection, to his demeanour on the pitch, to his approach to the game, in fact everything Raymond Domenech is a catastrophe and mind you, that’s no exaggeration. The absence of Zizou is telling on the French team and it is in the central midfield role that they’ve been found wanting. How and why Domenech hasn’t found a solution to that still amazes me.

A coach that chooses his team based on horoscopy (or so I’m told) will definitely have problems. Then again there’s a saying that goes like “never kill the chicken that laid the golden egg”. It’s the “Hand of Henry” that got them on a plane to South Africa so why is he depending on the “leg of Govou, Valbuena” and co to get them through? He should start Thierry and maybe God will hear their prayers. Curiously, in support of Nicholas Anelka, the rest of the squad staged a one-day strike in sympathy and refused to train. I love French sitcoms (who am I deceiving?). You can call this one “The French Revolution”.

Anelka has been expelled and that leaves Domenech with a divided dressing room and a striker short. That of course is a ‘recipe for disaster’. I don’t expect them to win their last group match but whether South Africa can/will take advantage of a divided French team is totally up to Carlos Alberto Parreira and his charges. Meanwhile reports coming out of France is that , “French bank Credit Agricole SA has suspended a TV advertisement featuring top French players after the boycott of the training session”. And fast-food chain Quick is cancelling an advertising campaign with Anelka. However “posters featuring the Chelsea striker holding up a burger as if it were a trophy will remain on Paris streets until Wednesday because there's no way to pull them down faster”. Who says football is just a game?

When Fabio Capello relieved John Terry of his duties as captain of the English national football team, I recall what was said about the justification for his actions. Back then, my advice to him was that if he didn’t want any further trouble with his dressing room then he should as well expel Terry from the national team altogether. But as strong headed as most Italians are, Capello refused to heed my advice and today he’s fighting those demons all over again. Information reaching my desk is that Capello is unhappy with certain remarks that J.T made to the media.

Terry said on Sunday that the players planned to hold clear-the-air-talks with Capello, with several reportedly unhappy at the Italian's tactics. However the Chelsea captain backed down after he discovered he did not have the support of other players. “Et tu Brutus”? In response, this is what Capello had to "This is the big mistake - a very big mistake. It's not revolution. It's the mistake of another player - no more." Mistake uh? Capello I hate to say I told you so but I told you so. French revolution, English revolution, now what?

Then there’s the issue of the alleged rift between the Ghana coach Milovan Rajevac and Sulley Muntari. This isn’t big enough to merit a revolution status but then again it’s equally destructive to team morale. Once again the Black Stars team officials are being cagey about the issue but from what I’m gathering, Sulley Muntari reacted angrily and in a manner that was offensive to the team's code of conduct in the aftermath of Ghana's game against Australia. Why does it feel like a déjà vu? It is? Oh ok that explains why?

Enough of the ‘off the pitch’ squabbles, lets get ‘on the pitch’. In the first round of matches, we had fewer goals, fewer cards and fewer bad refereeing decisions. In the second round of group games, the increase in goals came with an increase in cards, bad refereeing and “Oscar award winning” theatrics.
The refereeing in this round of matches has been horrible to say the least. Let’s take it back to the beginning, the ref in the South Africa-Mexico game, then fast forward to the ref in the USA-Algeria game and then the worst culprit of all is the ref in the Brazil-Cote D’Ivoire game. His performance was just too inconsistent. The worst part is, it’s not as if he was cheating for one side, he was just messing up the beauty of the game.

The standard of refereeing should improve in the subsequent games or else I won’t be too surprised if we see players beating up the refs for wrong calls particularly with so much at stake in the coming matches. Obviously we don’t want that to happen so the refs should wake up.
As I did with the first round of matches, I’ll take you through the second round of matches but this time I’ll look at the games group by group. Also I’ll give you my best eleven for the second round and then I’ll take your questions and suggestions. Lets starts with group A

GROUP A: The South Africa-Uruguay game set the tone for the second round of matches. The South Africans had to win that game to improve their chances of qualifying but even the cry of the vuvuzelas didn’t give the Bafana Bafana enough impetus to win the match. Their next game is against France and even though a win is not far fetched, I don’t expect South Africa to make it out of the group stage. But football has a way of surprising us, maybe the Bafana Bafana can pull off a miracle. In any case, I’m hopeful rather than expectant.

The Mexicans defeated France in the second round of matches and now all they need is a draw against Uruguay to seal qualification. If the lose to Mexico and France draw with South Africa, both Uruguay and Mexico will qualify from group A. As for the French, personally I’ve written them off. I don’t expect much from them.

GROUP B: Argentina’s produced an impressive 4-1 win over South Korea in their second group game. Messi finally showed glimpses of his Barcelona form. Gonzalo Higuain scored a hat trick, the first hat trick at this year’s World Cup and the 48th hat-trick in the history of the FIFA World Cup. If Argentina avoids defeat against Greece they’ll qualify in first place.

Nigeria should have won that game against the Greeks but you can’t blame them, what do you expect when humans come against gods. Did you see “Apollo, Athena, Poseidon, and Hades? What’s happening to the African teams? I’m tempted to talk about the Sani Kaita’s moment of madness but I’ll let it pass. He has suffered enough already. Nigeria’s qualification is not in their hands anymore, to qualify, they must beat South Korea and hope that Greece loses to Argentina. That’s the only way out for them.

GROUP C: The Americans did very well against Slovenia and if not for the wrong call by the ref they would have snatched “a win from the jaws of defeat”. After going down 2-0 earlier in the game, the Yankees rallied back to level the scores at 2-2 before the final whistle. Michael Bradley’s equalizer is the first FIFA World Cup goal to be scored by a player for a team coached by his father. Interesting trivia. Their next game is against Algeria and they’ll need to win that game to improve their chances of qualifying.

The English team has done it again. Two draws in a row. What is wrong with those “Three Lions”. Maybe we’ll have to send them back to the zoo. Let’s not take anything away from the Algerians though, they played very well against England. To me, Algeria should have even won that game. Gerard and his boys were just bland. No wonder their fans were booing them. The Algerians can qualify if they win against USA. As for England, they need a win badly. Their chances are slim but they still can qualify.

GROUP D: Serbia produced a shock win over Germany and Ghana drew with Australia. A win for Germany and Ghana would have decided the group but as it stands, Group D is very open, in fact too open. Germany and Ghana will qualify if both group matches end in a draw. There are so many other scenarios and that’s what makes this group a difficult one. If Ghana beat Germany and Australia beat Serbia then Germany will have to board the next flight to Munich. Come what may, I expect Ghana to qualify.

GROUP E: Holland secured a 1-0 win over Japan and Cameroon’s loss to Denmark means that they are now out of the World Cup. The Dutch have sealed their qualification so Japan and Denmark will have to fight for the next available slot. But then again Japan or Denmark can qualify in pole position if they record a better goal difference than Holland. I don’t expect that to happen though. I see Holland qualifying as group leaders. I’m tipping Japan to take the second slot, I hope they don’t disappoint. The Japanese might just be the surprise package at this World Cup.

GROUP F: The Italians are yet to win a match at this World Cup with their match against New Zealand ending in a draw. To their credit, the All Whites produced a “back against the wall” performance and that is something they should be commended for. It’ll surprise you to know that the Italians are yet to win a match in the year 2010. Italy will need a win to be sure of qualification. If they draw against Slovakia then they’ll have to pray that New Zealand loses to Paraguay. I expect them to qualify but I don’t think they’ll top the group.

GROUP G: Brazil’s win against Ivory Coast has effectively handed them passage into the next round. Kaka saw red, Fabiano used his hand and Kader Keita landed a Hollywood contract. The summary of it is that, the ref was just awful.

Portugal recorded the highest scoreline so far with a 7-0 drubbing of Korea DPR. Group G has been decided but the only issue left is the battle for the top spot. That will be decided in the clash between Brazil and Portugal. A draw will be enough to settle this one but trust the Portuguese to put up a fight against Brazil. I won’t miss this match for nothing.

GROUP H: Chile struggled against Switzerland but they eventually scored and that win puts them in good stead to qualify to the next stage. Elsewhere, Spain finally turned their swag on and though they should have scored more goals, a win is a win and that is what they needed to put their World Cup dreams back on track. Nothing has been decided though, Spain and Switzerland are equal on points and anyone could qualify. Chile, Spain, and Switzerland all have a good chance of qualifying. It’s too close to call especially when Spain will have to play Chile. The Chileans only need a draw and that shouldn’t be too difficult for them.

MY TEAM OF THE ROUND: Today I’m selecting my team based on a 4-3-3 formation.

GOALKEEPER:

Before I get to the “Goalkeeper of the round” award, please allow me to introduce to you my “Jabulani Hall of Shame”. This hall is for all those who have fallen victim to the perceived “curse of the Jabulani”. Let me make this clear, to me, the chorus of people complaining about the Jabulani ball is more irritating than the supposed deficiency of the ball itself. Nonetheless, I’ve decided to look at the funny side of it and hence my “Jabulani Hall of Shame”. So far I’ve inducted four members and as the tournament goes on I hope to induct more. Currently I have Robert Green (England), Fawzi Chaouchi (Algeria), Eiji Kawashima from Japan, and Richard Kingson.

Where was I? Okay, moving on to the “Keeper of the round” award. This goalkeeper had to face almighty Italy in that Group F match between New Zealand and Italy. Despite the constant bombardment by the Italians Mark Paston produced outstanding saves to keep the Italians at bay. He frustrated that Italians so much so that I’m sure the Italians thought they were up against Buffon himself. He’s my goalkeeper for the round. Mark Shwarzer was close but Paston nicked it.

RIGHT BACK: Jonas Gutierrez from Argentina. He handled the right side of defence for Argentina very well. It could have been Gregory Van der Wiel from Holland or Maurizio Isla from Chile but I choose Gutierrez for something more than running forward and getting crosses into the box. He played like a modern day right wing back but was by no means ineffective when it came to defending. Gutierrez is my right back for the second round. He plays his club football for Newcastle.

CENTRE BACK: Personally I’ve tipped Lucio to make FIFA’s “dream team” at the end of the tournament so I’m very pleased he’s justifying my faith in him. His performance against Ivory Coast has further enhanced his reputation as a world class centre back. The Ivorians didn’t give him much of a scare but anytime they did, the Brazilian captain was on hand to sniff out their attacks. Good game by Lucio.

CENTRE BACK (2): I’ve always been an admirer of Gerard Pique and hence he doesn’t have to do a lot to impress me. In the game against Honduras, he was a rock in the heart of the Spanish defence. I was particularly impressed by the way he kept supporting the attack in search of goals. His aerial ability was superb. It’s no wonder that at this age he’s an integral part of the Spanish team.

LEFT BACK: I gave this position to Carlos Salcidos without thinking. Michel Bastos caught my eye in the first round but this time, it’s Carlos Salcidos for me. His performance against France was outstanding. He kept running forward and was always on hand to support the Mexican attack. Nothing “French” went through his side, nothing!!!

DEFENSIVE MIDFIELD: Raphael Marquez. Honestly I don’t feel like explaining myself because the France Mexico game said it all. Marquez always performs for country and his game against France was just business as usual. He shielded the Mexican defence from the French and his assist to Javier Hernandez was superbly executed. He played his captain’s role to perfection.

CENTRAL MIDFIELD: Karim Ziani. He is a French born Algerian who plays for Wolfsburg in the German Bundesliga. Did very well against England. I like his work rate and his range of passing. He fits in perfectly here.

CENTRAL MIDFIELD (2): Landon Donovan. I’m one of the people who believe that Landon Donovan shouldn’t be playing in Major League Soccer (MLS). This guy is a fantastic midfielder and he’s always prepared to put in 200% for any side he plays for. His commitment to the course of the team is always remarkable. In that game he covered almost every area of the pitch. His goal was well taken and that sparked USA’s comeback. He’s a rarity and I hope he gets a big club to sign him very soon. Let’s face it, MLS is too low for him.

RIGHT WING: He’s a number seven’s number seven. Alexi Sanchez is slowly emerging as a real revelation at this tournament. The Chile-Switzerland was never a bore thanks to Sanchez and his partners in crime. He was a joy to watch. For those of you who were watching Wimbledon tennis instead of Chile versus Switzerland, well, you’ve missed a lot. I believe Alexis Sanchez would possibly be the next big thing out of Chile.

LEFT WING: Lionel Messi. Need I say more? Yes I’ll say more, this little Argentine was just “Messiless” in his assault of the South Korean defence. He had an average game against Nigeria and that was because the rest of the team left everything on his young (but able) shoulders. This time with the help of Di Maria and Higuain, Messi finally came alive. Andre Ayew could have owned this spot but sorry Dede Ayew “El Mesias” deserves it more.

STRIKER: Diego Forlan, Gonzalo Higuain, Luis Fabiano, and David Villa. All these four strikers had good
games in the second round and honestly any one of them will do. Having said that, I think I’ll go for Diego Forlan. Goals aside, he impressed me with his link up play and his movement on the ball. His strength and aerial ability made him a living hell for the South African defence. Forlan is my striker for the second round despite Gonzalo Higuain’s hat trick.

Line up:

Mark Paston

Jonas Gutierrez, Lucio, Gerard Pique Salcidos

Landon Donovan, Raphael Marquez, Karim Ziani

Alexis Sanchez, Diego Forlan, Lionel Messi.

I’m through with this one. Hope to catch you again on the next edition of ZAKUMI’S DIARY. Take care of your self and remember to keep waving the African flag. Peace out!!!

JUDE ANIM