Nebraska Football 2011: 7 Pieces of Advice for Bo Pelini

Dear Coach Pelini:

I know you're not really much of an "advice" guy. I'm guessing you don't spend a lot of time reading Dear Abby and listening to Delilah on evening drive-time radio. You're a confident, self-assured, successful guy, and doing things your way have gotten you where you are. Frank Sinatra's "My Way" really could have been written for you.

But I've watched you for awhile, and I have a few suggestions that might help things out. Take them for what they're worth. Remember, I care about you, and I'm only trying to help.

Make Some Friends

I know you’re a focused guy and that you’re really locked in on what’s best for your football team. I know the media types aren’t your favorite people in the world. I know that sometimes—OK, a lot of the times—they ask dumb questions and are looking for ways to cause you trouble.

But it doesn’t do you any favors to make their lives more difficult. Sure, you’ve got to take care of your guys first and foremost, but it would do you and your team some good if you build up some goodwill with the media. If…let’s be honest, when…there’s another story about an angry blowup on the sidelines, if you’ve taken some time to build goodwill with some of the local and national media, you might take some of the sting out of the “crazy Nebraska guy” stories that will be written. That lessens the distractions for you and for your team.

Go with What You Know

The new guy calling your offensive plays seems very nice. He knows you pretty well, he doesn’t seem to use a lot of hair care product and (most importantly) he wasn’t hired by Bill Callahan. All of those things seem to speak well for Mr. Beck.

But he’s still a rookie offensive coordinator, so he might need some help. It would be a good idea if your Blackshirts were as stout this year as they have been in the past. I know you have a lot of faith in Beck, but you could make his job a lot easier if his offense only had to score 17-20 points per game to win. 

Keep the Hook Handy

He’s fast. Really fast. He can run away from bad defenses like Kansas State and Idaho. He can throw the ball pretty well, especially when teams are loading up to stop him running like Oklahoma State did.

But Taylor Martinez has his warts. We’ve seen a few of them before. Last year, you kept rolling him out even when he was injured and ineffective. It didn’t work out very well against Texas A&M. Or Oklahoma in the Big XII Championship. Or Washington in the Holiday Bowl.

I know, I know, Zac Lee and Cody Green weren’t setting the world on fire with their performance. But this Brion Carnes kid looks like he might be able to play a little bit. And if Martinez knows that he’s got to compete for his spot, maybe that will help his development.

Spend Time with the Kids

Kids can be exasperating, I know. They make mistakes. They have to learn the rules. They listen to strange music sometimes.

But you’ve got a lot of kids that could be playing for you next year, especially on offense. Brion Carnes, a redshirt freshman, will be backing up Taylor Martinez. Jamal Turner, a true freshman, looks like he will be important on special teams and a playmaking threat on offense. The three freshman running backs (Aaron Green, Braylon Heard, and Ameer Abdullah) will likely be your primary backups, being “The Burkheads” of the “Rex and the Burkheads” running back group.

So, yeah, sometimes kids can be trying. But the more time you spend with them, the more payoff you’ll get in the long run.

Stop Flirting

When the Miami job opened up, and you were linked with it, you weren’t exactly quick off the mark to say you were staying in Lincoln. When Les Miles looked like he was on his way out of Baton Rouge, you could have been a little more definitive about whether you wanted the gig.

I’m sure you’ve heard, but Nebraska fans are a little possessive about the Cornhuskers. They’re called the Children of the Corn, named after a Steven King horror story about a group of crazed kids, for a good reason. And in this case, it means that internet rumors will burn like this, and this, and this and this.

We all suspect that Ohio State, your alma mater, might be looking for a football coach after this season. The Children of the Corn would very much appreciate you letting them know, one way or the other, what your intentions are if that happens.

Stop Complaining

“The BCS! That’s why they made that call!”

Remember last year? The one where Nebraska fans lost their collective minds and spent an entire season convinced there was a conspiracy put together to give the Huskers a raw deal? The one where message boards and talk radio were dominated by talk of Dan Beebe and DeLoss Dodds and crooked referees?

OK, you probably don’t remember that bit, as I suspect you don’t listen to a lot of talk radio. But the rest of us do, and we’re pretty much all sick to the teeth of it. Your “that’s why they made that call” shout after the 2009 Big XII Championship against Texas kind of started that ball rolling, though. Please, please, don’t make us go through that again.

Lay off the Twitter

Social media can be a fun way to express yourself. But somehow talking about nudity, cat abuse and making fun of Gerry DiNardo’s bald head doesn’t seem like a smart thing to do for the face of the Nebraska program.

Whoops! That wasn’t you! That was @FauxPelini, a parody Twitter account. But if I were you, I’d be following that account. Not a great role model for you, but you’ll get some laughs out of it. 

Relax a Little

I get it, you’re an intense, emotional guy. I know it’s part of who you are, and part of what makes you successful.

But the red-faced, crazy-man sideline rants and referee abuse have a downside. They generate bad press for the program. They make it easier for a perception of Nebraska as a dirty team to get built up, rightly or wrongly. That perception, in part, cost Eric Martin a one-game suspension last year.

Look, no one expects you to put on a Tibetan monk’s robe and start chanting on the sidelines. But dialing the intensity down from 11 to 10 on the sideline will let you be true to yourself without having to deal with some of the negative side effects.

Like what you read? Follow me on Twitter @patrickrunge to track my thoughts and observations about college football—and one or two other topics —throughout the year!

And if you would like to contact me directly to schedule an interview, ask a question or to get my recipe for a killer peach cobbler, you can send an e-mail to [e-mail]. (DISCLAIMER: Peach cobbler recipe might not be all that killer.)