WWE RAW Review for 5/2/11 (The Rock's Birthday Celebration)

Eric Kanes@EricKanesContributor IIIMay 4, 2011

What's up, ladies and gentlemen? My name is Eric Kanes and I am here to welcome you to my weekly RAW Review, which just so happens to be the most electrifying RAW Review on the net.

Now, this week's RAW has gotten a very interesting response. Some people like it while some people hate it. Some people enjoyed having The Rock on for over an hour while others thought it was mostly a waste of time.

Personally, I'm on the fence. This RAW Review will take an extensive look at The Rock's presence on RAW and whether it did more help or harm to the program.

And without any further ado, from Miami, Fla., this is the RAW Review.

-The show kicked off with a video package that highlighted George Bush on 9/11 and the edition of SmackDown two days later. We then cut to Lilian Garcia who sang the national anthem. The announcers welcomed us to RAW and out came to The Rock to a huge pop. He got into the ring and said that before he moves on, he has one thing to say. "We got him." From there, he recited the Pledge of Allegiance. At this point, we were 15 minutes into the show. Later on, a video package of John Cena's post-PPV address was shown. So about 18 minutes of the show was dedicated to Osama Bin Laden's death.

I'm perfectly fine with addressing it as it is a huge deal but...18 minutes?! You've got to be kidding me. The video package and the national anthem would've been enough. Those extra 12 minutes could've been used for a #1 contender match for the next PPV, added to the Cena/Miz match to make it seem more important, used to build up a PPV match, or something. Wasting this much time was probably not the best idea.

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-The Rock went on to reminisce about his life and talk about how he was ready to party. Cue the anonymous RAW GM who buzzed in. Michael Cole was just about to quote him when The Rock told him to come into the ring and read it to his face like a man. The line of the night was when he called Cole a "drunk hobbit jack bag bitch."

Cole said that he only associates himself with winners and took off his suit and shirt, unveiling a Kevin Garnett jersey. The heat for this was incredible.

Cole eventually got into the ring and demanded an apology for both himself and the RAW GM. The Rock apologized and shook hands with Cole and then dropped him with a Rock Bottom. Pitbull then came out to sing which was pretty random.

I actually really enjoyed this segment. Cole is one of the best heel acts in the company and The Rock feeds off him perfectly, so it made for a really fun segment.

-Dwyane Wade and LeBron James wished The Rock a happy birthday at this point. There were at least a dozen more celebrities. The only memorable one was Steve Carell.

-I'm really loving heel Truth. His heel mannerisms and facial expressions easily make him one of the best right now. As I wrote last night, John Cena needs to be utilized in a feud against R-Truth for the next several PPVs while Truth still has a lot of momentum. This is just what he needs to take him to the next level.

-For the second night in a row, Kharma came out to kick some ass. This time, Maryse was her victim although Kelly Kelly was sitting in the corner, frightened. That's a brilliant strategy. If somebody ever tries to attack me, I'll just take a seat and wait for them. Either way, I'm glad that Kharma is here and I'm looking forward to seeing her crush the other divas.

-Backstage, there was a party for The Rock with Zack Ryder in the background. Vladimir Kozlov presented a masterpiece film idea for him with Santino dressed up as Luke Hobbs from Fast Five, Hornswoggle dressed up as The Scorpion King, and Khali dressed up as The Tooth Fairy. This was fine. It's pretty much what you'd expect for something like this.

-John Cena vs. The Miz was a solid 12-minute TV match. I'd even say that it was better than the one they had at WrestleMania. The fast pace and all the near falls had the crowd in the palm of their hands.

However, the only problem I have is with the way the ending was booked. Not only was The Miz made to look like a complete idiot when he held onto the title after knocking Cena out but Cena just jumped up in 10 seconds like nothing happened and took The Miz out.

What is the point of this? You spend two years building this guy up and crush all of his momentum in two days.

The worst part is that he will now be back to being a mid-carder since he will take a backseat to Del Rio. This is the problem with having all of the heels on RAW. The Miz needs to be sent back to SmackDown.

-Rey Mysterio & Kofi Kingston vs. Jack Swagger & Drew McIntyre was next. Del Rio was brought out to "scout new competition" even though all four guys were drafted from SmackDown along with him. Of course, we have to pretend that he's never seen any of them before.

-It seems like WWE is leaning towards another Del Rio vs. Mysterio program. A lot of people don't like it but what other option is there? Again, there's the problem with having all the heels on one show. Besides, their last program didn't really finish. They're building Del Rio up for his eventual program with John Cena so I'd have him go over clean here.

-There was more backstage stuff with Dolph Ziggler and Vickie Guerrero presenting a cake with Mae Young in it to The Rock. The Rock ended up making out with Mae Young and told Dolph that he gets more pie than him in a day than he does in a lifetime.

John Cena showed up backstage with the WWE title and said that he'd bring it to WrestleMania. That was pretty much the entire confrontation. They definitely needed to have a longer confrontation. The Rock was on for an hour and got only 30 seconds with John Cena. This entire show's booking was just strange.

-It looks like Mason Ryan might be getting a push with him being featured prominently here. He took out Kane with a uranage and Big Show with a spear. He left on his own while CM Punk was telling him to come back. It's waaaaaay too early for this.

With such a stacked roster, Mason Ryan wouldn't make it on his own. If they do plan on breaking him up with Punk, at least wait for a bond to grow between them. Breaking them up right after they've been paired up won't have much of an effect.

-To end the show, we got more Rock as he came out to thank everyone for coming and to say that next year's WrestleMania will be the greatest one ever. Vince McMahon, who inexplicably gets out of his coma every couple months, came out and played a video package dedicated to Rock as The Rock got emotional.

A singer named Mya came out to sing "Happy Birthday" to The Rock in the third musical performance of the night. To end the show, Rock thanked everyone for the birthday party and did his "Can you smell what The Rock is cooking?" Confetti and balloons dropped from the ceiling as the show went off air.

Final Thoughts

Wow, where do I even begin with this show? I guess I'll start off by saying that there were some good parts such as The Rock's opening promo and the John Cena/Miz match but A LOT of time was wasted.

I don't know the exact number but at least 60 percent of the show was dedicated to either The Rock's birthday party or Osama Bin Laden's death. There was also a bunch of singing and there was only about 20 total minutes of wrestling on the show. It was just an overall clusterf*ck.

Is it a good idea to have a show like this when you have only three weeks to build up a PPV? Probably not. They now have only two more weeks to build up the PPV which means that we'll either get a bunch of recycled matches or we'll get a bunch of thrown together matches. It's a lose-lose situation. Featuring The Rock for an hour isn't going to draw PPV buys.

All of the stuff on the show still could've been done. The Rock's entire birthday celebration should've been for the last 30 minutes of the show in the ring. John Cena should have come out to end it.

Cutting from the in-ring action to the celebration every five minutes and having the entire thing last an hour wasn't a very good idea.

Due to the poor streaming of the show, it gets a 5/10 from me.

I will be right back here this Saturday with my weekly review of SmackDown entitled "Smack Talk" but until then, I'm out!


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