Dull End to Arsene Wenger's Once-Vitriolic Rivalry with Man Utd Proves Sadly Apt

With the good-mannered and achingly dull air of a Parisian dinner party, it proved to be the type of occasion Arsene Wenger may struggle to excuse himself from when the summer comes and he has more time on his hands than at any other point in his life.

Losing in "Fergie time" would not have been how he would have dreamed of concluding the 22-year-old rivalry he has overseen between Arsenal and Manchester United, which in the past was often vitriolic to the point of being violent.

Yet as he helplessly watched Marouane Fellaini flick in a late winner on Sunday to conclude a game played at testimonial pace pretty much throughout, it felt like a sadly apt way to pull the plug on a battle that in truth has been on life support now for well over a decade. 

A measure of the game's lack of intensity, compared to bygone meetings between the two teams, could be found in the second half when television cameras panned to United legend Bryan Robson in the crowd. Yawning so hard, there's a danger he would have swallowed a whale had he been swimming in the sea. 

The farewell tour has only a few dates left to run, and as Arsenal's defeat leaves them as the only side in English football's top four divisions without a solitary away point in 2018, Wenger wears the look of the ageing rock star who should have hung the leather trousers up well before now. One suspects, like Mick Jagger, he just can't get no satisfaction other than by doing what he does.

Arsenal's sixth successive away defeat marks a nadir not matched, for wont of a better word, since Billy Wright was their manager in 1966. Doom-mongers will also have noted that as the Gunners finished the day with 57 points from 35 games, they are now guaranteed to finish the campaign with the worst points tally of Wenger's stewardship.

Still, it would be churlish to rake over recriminations now he has acquiesced to the wishes of the majority of Arsenal supporters, along with seemingly a significant number of his board, to exit stage left with a little dignity just about intact.

Dull but dignified seemed to be the dress code sent out to all involved at Old Trafford on Sunday. At least on the field; off it, there was a welcome reminder of how statesmen should conduct themselves.

A historic week in which North Korean leader Kim Jong-un and South Korea President Moon Jae-in sat down together and symbolically stepped into each other's country at the border had nothing on what went down in Manchester.

Wenger stepped beyond Old Trafford's own military demarcation line as he made his way out of the tunnel and was greeted by a rousing reception. It was telling how he was afforded a warmer welcome by United's supporters than his own last weekend, when in the home game against West Ham United—in the immediate aftermath of his forthcoming departure becoming public knowledge—the atmosphere was more tepid than a baby's bath.

Then just before kick-off, Sir Alex Ferguson made his way down from the director's box to present his one-time nemesis with a commemorative metal vase. It was a genuinely touching gesture between two men who, in their halcyon days, tended to exchange only the speckle from their spit when touchline dust-ups boiled over.

Wenger initially appeared taken aback as he took his memento encased in a wooden box. He probably feared it contained the severed leg from one of his former players, as provided by Roy Keane from when relations weren't quite so cordial.

Such was the feeling of camaraderie and nostalgia, or perhaps sensing an opportunity for mischief one final time, Ferguson even went as far as to call over Jose Mourinho for an impromptu photo.

With all the gauche awkwardness of a teenager asked to pose with their mother and her new boyfriend, the United manager shuffled over and offered the weakest of smiles, before practically sprinting to the sanctuary of his dugout. To his credit, it was his suggestion for Ferguson to be part of the ceremony, ahead of the fixture United's iconic former manager believes "made the Premier League," per United Review.

There's no doubt this was a moment for forefathers of the Premier League. Not the younger man who still has ambitions to be top dog again. Wenger, desperately swimming against the cruel tide of time, will have known just as much as he accepted his gift from a man, who, in the Frenchman's own words, "has other interests in life," where he does not.

Wenger's line post-match to Sky Sports about the reception he received from United's supporters was typically erudite, not to mention heartbreakingly self-aware: "It shows once you're not a danger any more people love you."

There was a sense of the inevitable about proceedings from the moment the teamsheets were handed in. Wenger was chasing just a fourth win in 22 Premier League matches at Old Trafford with a scratch side. Arsenal's last league success at United was in 2006 when Emmanuel Adebayor scored the game's only goal.

In fairness, given Arsenal clearly had their heads more in Madrid for Thursday's Europa League semi-final second leg against Atletico, those who started gave a fair account of themselves. If nothing else, next season's Carabao Cup team looks pretty healthy.

At an average age of just over 24, Wenger's starting XI was their youngest for a Premier League game since, ominously, the 8-2 defeat to United back in 2008.

As one of eight changes, Konstantinos Mavropanos, the 20-year-old Greek defender signed in January with a view to being loaned out immediately, became the 200th Arsenal player to be handed his debut under Wenger. The inclusion of fellow starlets Ainsley Maitland-Niles, 20, and Reiss Nelson, 18, had many a learned member of the press nodding earnestly and mouthing "good young player" while surreptitiously Googling each of their names.

While it was fitting the manager who, over the past 20 years or so, has been responsible for blooding more young talent than any other, did so again on his last trip to Old Trafford as Gunners boss, it also brought to mind an old line from the English writer Ian McEwan: "And though you think the world is at your feet, it can rise up and tread on you." 

Fears of an embarrassing evisceration proved unfounded. This current Manchester United side could be armed with meat cleavers and still struggle to carve up an opponent. Arsenal's young players were neat and precise, clearly au fait with the ideals Wenger tries to indoctrinate into all that play under him.

It made for a performance of quiet applause rather than chest-beating bravado, but there were occasional shoots of promise that will enthuse Wenger's successor, whoever he may be.

Even those of us who spent much of the match daydreaming about the spit-and-sawdust battles of Emmanuel Petit and Patrick Vieira vs. Keane and Paul Scholes, or the infamous 1990 brawl between the sides, by the end had realised Arsenal potentially have a real player on their hands in Maitland-Niles.

The England under-20 World Cup winner played with a needle and swagger to his game that suggested it's probably a good thing Wenger won't be around to smooth out those rough edges. He not only played the right pass at the right time more often than not, but he also did so early. And that's one of the hardest things to teach.

United's own ponderous rotation of the ball in midfield could do with someone of a similar ilk. Mavropanos barely put a foot wrong, either.

Granit Xhaka was given the captain's armband for the day. Like the Swiss Army knife of his homeland, he seemingly has plenty of useful parts. Alas, when you put any one of them into practice, it quickly becomes apparent it would have been better to have bought either a proper knife or a proper tin-opener. Or a proper holding midfielder or a proper playmaker.

His attempt to slide tackle Paul Pogba in the buildup to the Frenchman's opener for United was one-part mistimed to two-parts misjudged, while he was lucky to make half-time after committing a clear deliberate handball having already been booked for a trademark scything tackle on Jesse Lingard.

In keeping with the mood of the day, aptly named referee Kevin Friend contented himself with mouthing "think about it" to Xhaka rather than be a killjoy and apply the rules.

In the Sky Sports studio, Graeme Souness was less forgiving, to the point he went positively ballistic. After coining the phrase "kid-on football," he then launched himself into a diatribe about the midfielder that eventually morphed into his favourite topic of why Arsenal need "more men."

Pogba's goal had the home crowd chanting, "Arsene Wenger, we want you to stay," which in turn prompted a half-hearted response from the Arsenal fans of, "Arsene Wenger, he won the league here [16 years ago]." It was hardly "Souness stripped to the waist" stuff.

The atmosphere went up an octave when Henrikh Mkhitaryan restored parity shortly after the half-time interval.

Having been treated like a doormat by Mourinho throughout his time at Old Trafford before being sent to Arsenal as a makeweight in the deal that brought Alexis Sanchez to Manchester, the Armenian would have been within his rights to enjoy his revenge more than his non-celebration suggested he did.  

When United brought on Mr. Muscle in the 64th minute—Fellaini really does love the jobs the rest of us hate—that they were going to go direct was almost as inevitable as the fact Arsenal would not be able to cope. The soon-to-be-out-of-contract Belgian gave his chances of getting the deal he wants to stay in Manchester the proverbial shot in the arm, by proving to be the proverbial pain in the arse(nal). It's not as though he didn't give Wenger's side due warning.

With two minutes remaining, he hit the post from Anthony Martial's left-wing cross, with Marcus Rashford's follow-up correctly ruled out for offside. All three had been brought on by Mourinho, who again demonstrated he knows how to change the course of a game, ugly or otherwise, where Wenger does not.

Fellaini would be the required inches more precise with his next effort. The again-excellent Ashley Young whipped in a deep cross, and despite facing the ball as it came towards him, Fellaini managed to get enough purchase on it with a flicked header to beat the shaky David Ospina via the slightest of touches off Xhaka.

For United, it was a win just about deserved, albeit only via the referee's scorecard by virtue of throwing slightly more punches in a fight where few landed. Mourinho would never cede as much, but there's an argument his side are as far from Manchester City as Arsenal are from United.

For now, and perhaps forever, Wenger's record against Mourinho reads two victories from 19 attempts. If they meet again as opposing managers, he will not expect, nor receive, the niceties he was afforded on a strange but apt day at Old Trafford.

And that's no bad thing, for it will mean he is relevant again.