Steroids in Baseball: Does It Really Matter?

It’s the bottom of the ninth, with two outs and the home team is at the plate. The score is tied and the runner on first, Andy Amphetamine, has taken a wide lead off of the bag.

The pitcher, Henry (HGH) Humphries, glances over his left shoulder, decides his heat is enough to negate the runner’s big lead and fires a rocket toward the plate.

The batter, Sammy Steroid, anticipating the star pitcher would be offering his famous, flaming fastball, begins swinging as the ball is leaving the hurler’s hand. An explosive transfer of weight occurs as he pushes off of his back leg and begins his swing.

Both dugouts feel the air from the pumped-up behemoth’s tremendous swing as he connects with the ball, launching it down the left field line over the leaping third baseman, Andy Alcoholic.

Left fielder Craig Cocaine, realizing he won’t quite make it to the ball, lets it whiz by, preferring to play the ricochet off of the wall. He gallops at breakneck speed toward the wall, fields the carom on the fly, pivots and rifles a one-hopper toward the plate. It’s going to be a close play.

Wesley Workout, the gym rat catcher, senses the potential game-winning runner streaking toward him, just feet away from the plate, as he snaps up the one-hopper. The muscle-bound masked man braces himself for the inevitable collision, his body easily absorbing the brutal shock as he holds onto the ball.

Out number three. The game moves onto extra innings ...

My apologies to baseball "purists," but as a fan of the game of baseball, I can’t imagine a more exciting play than the one illustrated above. I don’t care what these guys have done to get themselves into the shape they are in. I am only interested in seeing riveting action.

From the time that the first ball was thrown, players of the game of baseball (and all other walks of life be it other sports, academia, politics, or the business world) have been doing whatever they could to be at the top.

If a "magic pill" that could make a person jump higher, run faster, and react quicker existed 50 years ago, I guarantee you that players would have been lining up to take it.

We have no idea what players were doing in the "golden era of the game" because the media, both professional and amateur, was not the same as it is today.

"But steroids are illegal," the purists say, conveniently forgetting that their hero, Babe Ruth, was downing more alcohol during prohibition than a body should be able to endure.

"It’s cheating the players who do it the right way," they continue, and this is a valid point! I can’t help but wonder, however, where to draw the line.

Is it "natural" to spend hours in the gym, sculpting each muscle of one’s body? Is it "natural" to take supplements that have not made it onto the banned list? How many cups of coffee or energy drinks constitute crossing that line between natural and artificial performance?

Each player must make his own decision. Does he have enough natural ability to keep up with other players? Does he have the work ethic to spend the hours in the gym necessary to keep each muscle at its peak?

How many extra hours beyond the already countless road trip time is he willing to spend away from his family? Is it worth risking his reputation? Is it worth risking being caught by the law?

These are undoubtedly tough decisions to make. Decisions made tougher still, when a player sees the benefits that are being derived from players who are not "doing it the right way." When a starting roster spot is on the line, how much is he willing to risk for that spot?

This is a game. It is entertainment. I find it so unbelievably offensive that 20 million dollars of taxpayers’ hard-earned money was spent on the Mitchell Report. I find it incomprehensible that our government officials felt that there were not things in this country that the money could not have been better spent on.

I realize that there are those who believe that our impressionable youth look at some of the record-breaking players of today’s era of baseball and think, "if it worked for them, it may work for me!"

I also believe that if the higher-and-mightier-than-thou media and government officials did not focus so much effort on exposing those players, the youth of America might not even be looking at steroids as a potential performance booster.

As is the situation with many of these "role model" cases, it is up to each parent to raise their own kids. It is up to them to instill the moral values that will shape the decisions their children make as they leave the nest and face the tough decisions in life.

It is far too convenient in today’s society to always pass the buck, blaming others for the problems that each individual is surely responsible for.

I, myself, choose free will. I have the power to make my own decisions and the responsibility of dealing with the consequences of those decisions.

Should I watch another re-run of Seinfeld or the game tonight? If it’s as exciting as the fictitious game referenced above, I’ll take the baseball game every time!